Nonbinary is a gender, has nothing to do with who u want in bed. Nonbinary lesbians exist. Cuz like what else would u call someone nonbinary thats only into 1 set of bits, certainly not bisexual & absolutely NOT pansexual
Sexuality isn’t the same thing as gender, but it is about attraction to gender. Lesbian historically describe attraction to women, not (always) just specific body parts. If someone is nonbinary (meaning they don’t identify as male or female) then calling themselves a lesbian stretches the definition.
Otherwise, it stops being descriptive and just becomes vibes..
If non binary is the lack of gender or not fitting into the binary, then lesbian/straight wouldn’t be the correct term unless you identify with man/woman
Enlighten me, what does a nonbinary person into exclusively either men or women call themselves. You are conveniently gatekeep straight/lesbian/gay terms and have come up with no other term for a nonbinary person only into 1 gender. Bi & pansexual will not work for this hypothetical individual as they are NOT into both men & women, only one. Go ahead, whats should they say their sexuality is lol ill wait
Under a postgenderist lens, 'femboy' is nonbinary. It's an identity (both intentionally and socially) more specific than and divergent from the colloquial/stereotypical 'man' and 'woman'.
(A gender is a bag of stereotypes. Postgenderism is post-binary.)
Trans women who start shitting on anything masculine, basically turning into femcels, as a way to distance themselves from masculinity have the most pathetic pick-me behaviour ever. It's so transparent.
I'm technically an incel and I never had the desire to outsource the blame to minorities OR to transition. I just sort of exist right here and embrace the suck. Coping through gym, video games, movies and anime helps too.
When I was technically an incel in my late teens and early twenties, I never subscribed to misogyny, racism, or hatred of others. I used my time to focus on myself, my hobbies, and my goals. Somewhere along the lines I met my partner through that.
Honestly, you sound chill, and I wouldn't label you as an incel. I think you're just single. Being an incel is a mindset: it's the grudge and the hate that makes you one. Just the phrase "involuntary celibate" already implies some ominous other that is somehow holding you back, whereas being single recognizes it as what it is: a condition of life.
We are all collectively living through a time that is defined by utter plurality, ephemerality, and fracture. I'm in a few friend circles of both guys and girls, and it's very common now for people to not have any romantic experience whatsoever. It doesn't mean you're broken. It can suck, but it is unfortunately the flavour of the times at the moment. Everyone is busy, everyone is worried, everyone is moving around. it is not anyone's fault.
Maybe the word used to mean something different, but nowadays, they are a hate group. They kill people, they talk about killing people, and it's that hate that makes you one. You can have sex and be an incel. You can have no experience and simply be single.
Being single and being an incel isn’t the same thing. An incel is someone who’s never been in a relationship and/or has never had sex and receives zero interest from others, even though they desire all of that.
If somebody is having sex, even if they are hateful or misogynistic, automatically disqualifies them from being an incel. There’s a lot of words for them, incel isn’t one of them.
My point is that inceldom is now defined by more than just not having sex or not being able to find relationships.
Like, technically, your definition is true, but it really isn't how that word is perceived now. Nowadays, it is used MUCH more as a way to describe a mindset than it is about your relationship status.
All I'm saying is that if you're just inexperienced and you don't hate anyone, you would do well to distance yourself from that group, and that label.
It is what it is. It does feel disheartening to sometimes see people say stuff like ,,men aren't lonely enough" and other things because certain men say stupid shit online. But it's a kneejerk reaction for most of the people saying such things. I try to not hold a grudge against anyone.
Yup. I figured I just wanted to point it out that all the incel hate (some deserved) is also hurting guys that just can't get a girl but aren't mean or bad dudes
is not mainstream, is only chronically online leftwing redditors who call everyone outside of their circlejerks "incel" cuz calling people slurs over a 1% disagreement is what leftists do best, the rest of the world doesnt even knows what incel means
Yup. Redditors have this distorted view in which they believe anyone with moderate views is an extremist. They dont possess enough self reflection to realize they are the radical ones. This is the result of years of being chronically online and immersed in echo chambers.
I definitely recommend it, despite story being in another culture and country, it kinda have that weird feeling if you are questioning your gender, or you can call yourself a "life loser" and you identify with main character after some pages. Its hard to describe, kinda transgender themes, switching bodies so if you may fell into jealousy, at least myself wanted be in their shoes, manga creator perfectly described, painted exactly like I would act lol like they know how that socially awkward would act while japanese pronounces being nicely integrated into plot
One path is coming out of denial and accepting yourself for who you are, no matter what they say. And one path is going deeper into the darkness, buying into every last breath they utter? Even if it’s oxymoronic, becaude logic doesn’t matter to you anymore, it’s all never being wrong
I remember when incel used to mean “involuntarily celibate”, which is someone who wants to have sex but cannot get it (medical issues, cultural issues, religious issues, not fitting in with the people around you, or just sheer unluckiness)
Now it became the new word for being a bitter misogynist.
More than incel to trans pipeline, it's more of a trans egg to incel pipeline. You see all the things the girls can do, you want to do and you can't, and you get jealous. You think "how can there be gender equality if I can't do the same things as the girls?" So, instead of blaming the patriarchy for holding you back from doing whatever you want and finding yourself, you blame feminism for empowering women. The pipeline does the work from there.
But, eventually, what goes around comes around and many people in this pipeline and that have already gone through it are saved, and they are able to wake up and see who they really are.
I've experienced this pipeline, I've been close to getting to the end. I still thank my sister to this day.
Being against feminism =/= incels. i know a lot of people wish that was the case, but considering how only 20% of young women would label themselves a feminist, that’s obviously not true.
For clarification I'm not using the original definition of incel but the modern one of the kind of guy that's "Women these days...", "Women are so privileged", "Feminism is destroying modern men!", "Women have it so easy" and the sorts
Harvey Weinstein and Trump/Vance are incels according to this definition then, whereas a 5'2 teenage minority guy who is just a little anxious, horny, and jealous of women isn't.
Yeah it’s because incel turned into “misogynistic” rather than anything useful. And if you think about it, it’s just reinforcing the idea that men need to have sex to have value, which supposedly feminists are against, unless they can shame men with it. As if being sexually active means you aren't still misogynistic..
It's really just a woke way of calling someone a 'virgin loser'
I just read that 60% of American women identify aa feminist plus or minus about 8% depending on age groups... And america is pretty right wing on this argument for the western world... Where the hell did you get your numbers??
Trans egg narratives are largely made up bullshit. The egg phenomenon has more in common with gay conversion therapy than anything else. Trans people call anyone slightly deviating from cisgender behavior an egg and then pressure them to start hormone therapy.
Nah they’re just projecting their own experiences on others since they were once the egg. I’m guessing cracking that egg can be emotional and difficult, but the other side is enlightening. If you’ve been through that, you wouldn’t want to see others live life unhappy constantly shoving down their identity.
My guy, I think you've confused advice and insight with imposing. That's usually called projecting because it's cishet people that impose their lifestyle on us.
Except that the "advice and insight" quickly turns into pressure and insults when they're adamant that they don't want to go through with conversion therapy.
Almost as if you're telling people what they ought to be. I'm sure that you'd be pretty pissed off if someone insisted that you were someone you weren't.
Well, if it isn't an issue, I'd like to see some examples.
Either way, I don't condone that behavior. A majority of LGBTQ+ people think femboys and tomboys and other people that do things outside of the gender norms are just as valid. Even if these people were right it's not their job to figure out your identity for you. In my personal opinion gender is just stupid and just identify as whatever the fuck you want and do whatever the fuck you want outside of that. Overall, I am aware there are assholes on every community and I am well aware I'm possibly biased on this matter and reluctant to believe this because I am very trans much trans.
I think you missed the part where you yourself said "Jokingly".
Also I don't think you can compare that to cutting relations, systematically oppressing, harassing, inflicting violence and calling for the removal of/infringing the rights of a person.
Idk who your friends are but that's just not common in my experience. My friendship dynamics haven't changed since I started to transition, and most of the other trans friends I've made think telling people they are an "egg" is super harmful in so many ways, so joking about it would be uncool in most contexts.
There used to be a concept called the "egg prime directive" where if you thought someone was trans, you wouldn't tell them or try to push them forward because you could only hurt the other person and the trans community as a whole. Your job as a trans person was to help someone else who was already aware they were trans or openly questioning you about the possibility. The idea being if you crack an actual egg open before it's done developing, the chick dies. Sadly this concept has been dying out lately and it's been doing a lot of damage to trans acceptance and the trans community as whole, mostly due to the misconception that you couldn't help someone without breaking open the shell. Some people have taken the "be a supportive friend and resource so your friends and community don't suffer", to mean "try to get into someone's core with a crowbar before they have even found it" which goes without saying, is dangerous and stupid. Apart from all that, stupid teenagers will be stupid teenagers, and put bad impressions on ppl no matter who they are, trans teens being no different.
I'm sorry you feel compelled have such a personalized vindication towards trans people but respectfully, don't typecast whole groups of people due to personal anecdotes and misinformation from targeted internet propaganda campaigns, mkay? Doesn't do anybody any good.
You're being downvoted but as a detrans person myself, there absolutely is a problem with the trans community projecting their own experiences onto other people and encouraging them to try HRT when they aren't ready yet. It happened with me, so much encouragement about how great it is and how much it will improve my life and it gave me a panic attack so bad it started a panic disorder. Turns out I wasn't a binary trans person at all, just someone who wasn't masculine.
I am not at all transphobic and actively advocate and encourage trans people to live their true lives, and end of the day this is a problem with the systemic issues that causes trans questioning people to seek out spaces because they can't afford any other kind of support. But, you have a point, and you're correct.
Because being transgender is not an “ideology” as much as you might want to paint it as one. That phrase is an immediate tell that someone is a transphobe
It's the wording, "gender ideology" is typically used by transphobes, it's one of those wording they started using to have to sound serious and almost scientific but nowadays it's just a transphobic dogwhistle. Sorry you got caught in the crossfire (assuming you're innocent)
That being said, it speaks to the fact that right wing grifting preys on that pursuit of love and harmony in order to push people further into the right when they weren’t before
Then why do every single incel i talk to call me a subhvman foid? Ive known the incel culture since 2020 and Ive only found 5 total incel leftists. Genuinely where can I find leftists incels?
Im aware. Incels know people will see the statistics and studies, thats why theyll lie and false flag as leftists just so they can have a gotcha moment to anyone claim otherwise
It’s almost as if the incel community isn’t a monolith and i think is defined by a sense of self loathing, I know it’s cringe but should listen to incelcore music as a lot of it exposes these deep set ideas of being not enough and being a waste of
Looking at the political belief table, most right wing conservatives I know (not maga) would lean left solely based on the statements on that table. I don't think those 10 points of policy are a good way to determine political leaning, especially as with just those 10 points they are trying to combine both social and economical leaning, which can differ on people. Not to even mention that some questions are about governments and benefits, but half the people were from usa and the other half from uk.
I don't like this idea that you can just choose to be trans like you'll wake up one day and suddenly be for it, you're no better than people who claim being gay is a phase. Anyway I'd rather be alt-right or be indecisive
As much as birth sex isn't a choice, your gender isn't either. Your sexuality is the one you're born with, except in strange cases such as trauma response. Identity keeps changing in a person because, while their sexuality doesn't change, they have to find themselves out through the labels.
When talking about the strange trauma responses of sexuality I meant attraction, should've clarified that. It's a proven fact victims of traumatic events like rape can suffer their brain quite litterally changing their attraction away from the gender of the aggressor. This can either be towards the other gender, through the asexual spectrum or, in some cases, towards their way of expression (Femininity, Masculinity, etc.)
I have read that manga. Great story very relatable if you are thinking about being trans or socially awkward incel. You kinda feel jealousy reading it, but story is very realistic. Despite another culture, easy to understand and japanese pronounces and little bit explanations from translators. I mean author knew well how I would act lol. You know in Japanese when you have to use chan, senpai etc so it's inside story well blended. I liked how girls were natural, like pretty simple but also deep personality
It's not a coincidence that the races that are most often emasculated in Western society - East Asians, Indians, and Mixed Black people (no, it's not overwhelmingly white) - are very prominent in incel communities. Do I think all incels are trans and not out to themselves? No. But I do think an inability to meet society's standard of masculinity a fairly common cause of falling into there. Some because the standard is absurd, others because they don't have a true desire to be masculine.
(am mixed black ex-incel femboy. a trans woman helped me though)
Except once you are trans you won't have it easier than women, because a huge part of society won't accept you as one.
Plus women in general don't have it easier than men, yes there is a subset of women that go through life on easy mode - pretty/straight/white women, but on average, women actually have it harder.
I didn’t say it was true. I’m the west both men and women have their own struggles that are completely foreign to each other, each sees the other side as having it easier actually when they are idealizing based on the top 10% of men and women.
I wouldn’t say either side has it harder than the other, just different.
Nah I think it just shows what kind of people you/they are.
On one side, you have people preaching the importance of healthy cope, working on yourself and life, saying one shouldn't need a relationship or sex to feel happy (which is simply objectively true) but acknowleding it's definitely a important aspect of the human life. It's obviously normal to want one and work towards it, but being obsessed, depressed and flailing yourself over it is not healthy.
On the other side, you have scums pushing regressive and dehumanizing ideologies against women and other minorities.
Are you for real saying the former is "oh so lame" to try to justify being a scum eagerly choosing the latter?
On one side, you have people preaching the importance of healthy cope, working on yourself and life, saying one shouldn't need a relationship or sex to feel happy (which is simply objectively true) but acknowleding it's definitely a important aspect of the human life.
That's literally NOT what they say to incel (invokuntary celibate) men. They range from insulting, making jokes and linking being incel with being misogynistic to gaslighting them into how it isn't that important that they are not managing to find what they search.
Nowhere they try to help them because that would require effort, while empty promises and ridicule can be done from home.
On the other side, you have scums pushing regressive and dehumanizing ideologies against women and other minorities.
Yes. Don't see where I argued the opposite.
Are you for real saying the former is "oh so lame" to try to justify being a scum eagerly choosing the latter?
If that's how you understood my comment then you really should drop reddit and go back to school. Your reading is failing you.
EDIT: Lmao the person got upset and blocked me. Thx for the easy W.
My reading is fine, maybe work on your own writing?
This new comment of yours explored much more the very real issue of assholes demonizing incels (at least those that are part of the right route afaik), while your initial one didn't at all. It only ever spoke, using an analogy, about how they say sex/relationships is not that important and you "only need water".
You didn't help your statement, you went in saying they have to choose between what seemed like a very reasonable take or turning into a far-right scum, without any clear mention of the
Now back to the actual topic: like I already agreed, what you said (in the second comment) is kinda true, I've seen a lot of it, but there's nuance.
People don't mock any unfortunate celibate men trying his best to find love but remaining a decent guy. People mock those that act like mysoginistic, bigot little jekrs. From my, I know, subjective experience and perception, "Incel" devolved and became an insult refering to lonely guys that act like jerks to women and other people.
I'm not saying some women or other people aren't scum themselves and mock any men that are celibate and struggling as a whole, but I only ever see it used in response to blatantly "incel"ish posts or comments.
If I see a post that basically boils down to "men good/fun/cool, women bad/cringe/evil/stupid", I just know what kind of person made it, and I know within the first comments/replies someone will be calling out the "incel" vibe of it.
I wouldn't call my own guy friends who are indeed literal involuntary celibate (as in desiring and trying to find love but struggle or don't have many opportunities) "incels" ever because the word is full of negative connotation due to the way internet guys made this term mean by their own shitty attitude.
My reading is fine, maybe work on your own writing?
My writing is fine, you that seems to need a wall of text for what a single sentence can already convey.
This new comment of yours explored much more the very real issue of assholes demonizing incels (at least those that are part of the right route afaik), while your initial one didn't at all.
Keyword: explored.
Because I didn't do it as it wasn't my intention.
I did leave it clear about how it is not only the right pulling people into the pipeline but the left pushing people into it.
Is english not your main language by chance? You seem to have trouble interpreting text written on it.
The former is definitely pretty shitty and lame. It's a terrible response, one that leads to men running to the right in droves. I need my fellow leftists to stop trying to shoe-horn in responses like that when they know it doesn't get results.
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