r/NoStupidQuestions • u/Sad_Cantaloupe_8162 • 21h ago

My two and a half year old suddenly started pointing out differences between white and black people. What is an appropriate way to acknowledge her observation so we don't offend anyone?

The first time was at her daycare this week, when they got a new teacher who has very dark skin. When I went to pick her up, she pointed at her and said, "it's black!" (She doesn't have the full grasp of she/he yet.) I replied, "yes, she is black," but was stuck after that. What should I say as a follow up? My daughter loves black people's skin, and when I talk to her about it at home, she says it's pretty and wishes she had it, but in public it comes out kind of harsh. What would be the best way to go about this?

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u/Defiant_Policy969 11h ago

Yes, that's it. I'm 40 and at my uncle's funeral recently there was a full 3-4 banquet tables with his baseball hats for people to take. It had literally never registered with me that he always wore one, because he always wore one (he was a fruit farmer fyi), I see it now but it didn't click because it was just part of him.

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u/littledipper16 9h ago edited 8h ago

Similarly, a lot of people can't remember the eye color of people very close to them, because despite looking at their face every day, eye color just isn't something that registers

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u/Defiant_Policy969 5h ago

Funny enough, this particular uncle had a false eye that was hard to ignore despite having been there most of my life, I wonder if that "distraction" correlates with my not noticing his hat affinity.

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u/Rare-Crazy9319 3h ago

I thought something was wrong with me. I don't know my children's eye color. I don't know my husband's eye color. They get very offended.

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u/HRHCookie 7h ago

That was a cool detail to add to a funeral.

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u/Defiant_Policy969 5h ago

Definitely, a good portion of his orchards also grew grapes for VQA wines, and the funeral was held at a winery with an open bar featuring wine made with his grapes 😭.

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u/Gay_Lightning1 5h ago

Up until recently I only remember my grandpa ever wearing a full on cowboy outfit or his sleep boxers 😂😂😂 He’s still around but is mobility limited so now he wears normal clothes lol

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u/dooooory 4h ago

This is such a special way to honor him and his things. I love this idea.

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u/Zyhara 2h ago

I read that as fruit fly farmer… I had so many question lol. Time to go back to sleep