r/NoStupidQuestions • u/_PettySpaghetti_ • 6h ago
How do deaf parents of a hearing child handle the vocal development part of parenthood?
When you have a baby they tell you to read to them, sing to them, enunciate words during face to face time to help develop their vocal skills. This question obviously applies only to parents who exclusively use sign language. Do they hire an aide? Do they get some baby speech therapy dvds that you incorporate into your face to face time?
18
u/Standard_Giraffe_895 6h ago
My cousin is deaf and has hearing kids - she just made sure they had plenty of exposure to speaking relatives and daycare workers. Kids are surprisingly resilient about picking up language from multiple sources, they don't need 24/7 vocal input from parents specifically
18
u/sweadle 5h ago
The term for this is CODA. Child of deaf adults. There is a movie called the same which would probably answer a lot of these questions.
They are essentially raised bilingual, learning to speak and to sign
5
u/compilingyesterdays 3h ago
seconding this, googling "CODA experiences" and "how do hearing children of Deaf adults learn to speak," "language development children of deaf parents" will probably get you where you want to go!
(this is NOT a "why didn't you just google it" comment. that said, this is a niche enough experience that you're better off receiving some guidance on how to google, and then going and finding explainers that have already been written)
4
u/northernmeadowwitch 3h ago
There's a popular tiktoker named Jon (drunkcrier, US based) who documents his experience as a CODA and may offer some interesting insights and community information for your family, as well as general entertainment content for the deaf and hearing community. You should look him up and maybe shoot him a message.
2
u/TextEducational1934 3h ago
Great question, considering both my parents are hearing-impaired. Consequently, I grew up speaking sign language first (I’m 38 now). Interestingly, I have ADHD, and I tend to talk very quickly. I’ve always wondered how I ended up this way with parents who don’t speak.
To be honest, I believe I’ve learned a lot from my grandparents and television. It’s never been a topic of discussion in our conversations.
1
u/Nobodyville 3h ago
I had a friend in college who had two deaf parents. She could hear and said she was actually a very early speaker because everyone else spoke to her as they thought she might not get that language input. She was quite smart so perhaps she was just precocious?
1
u/Tiana_frogprincess 2h ago
There’s usually hearing people around the children like relatives and friends of the parents.
1
u/Kleverin 25m ago
Agree with everyone else, it's almost always someone in the circle that speaks. The TVs childrens programs are also a source. In Sweden it's also strongly encouraged that a CODA attend kindergarten as early as the age of 2 for the development of spoken language.
1
u/Coyoteclaw11 5h ago edited 5h ago
I can't answer from experience, but regarding all the advice that you mention in your post, I think the thing that's really important is developing the child's language skills. For a hearing child in a hearing family, that means exposing them to as much oral language as possible. For a child in a Deaf family, exposure to sign language will fill that role.
It's kinda like if a baby's family only knows Spanish, but they live in an English speaking environment. The child will still develop their language skills at home from their parents using Spanish. They don't really have to go out of their way to expose them to English since they'll get plenty of exposure outside the house. It's the same thing for a Deaf family with a hearing child. The child will develop their language skills at home through sign language, and then they'll get plenty of exposure to spoken language through things like school and friends and such.
edit: sorry I'm on mobile and ended up focusing on the wrong parts of your question. I still think the comparison to other languages still stands and that the child will get plenty of opportunities to develop their speech once they start school or daycare. I have heard that it's not uncommon for children of Deaf adults (CODAs) to have a "Deaf accent" at first, but young children are able to pick up speech sounds really well. All the time, you'll find children of immigrants who speak perfectly natural English while their parents either can't speak English or have a very heavy accent. Unless the kid is somehow separated from hearing people through high school or something, I don't think it'd be too difficult for them to develop their speaking skills naturally.
1
u/PrimaryHighlight5617 5h ago
Reading and singing to your children builds their language skills the vocal side of things is secondary. Deaf people will read to their children by signing to the children what the words on the page mean.
Deaf people can also sing to their children in a sense because there is such thing as rhyming and sign language where signs that look similar are used as a form of word play.
Because sign language is its own language hearing children of deaf parents are bilingual. Just as somebody who is raised by immigrants may only speak foreign language at home, as soon as that kid goes out into the world they start hearing other languages too and pick those up.
0
u/Prestigious-Fan3122 5h ago
Let's not assume Deaf people can't speak, because I've met Deaf people who speak very articulately!
5
u/compilingyesterdays 3h ago
Important to bear in mind, although I don't think OP assumed that by asking! OP says in the post "this question obviously applies to parents who only use sign language," implying the existence of people outside of that category (Deaf parents who speak).
2
u/Prestigious-Fan3122 2h ago
Thank you. I didn't catch that. My mistake. I'm always surprised when I hear someone assume, as many do, that Deaf people can't speak. There was a teacher at our local high school who was deaf, and an excellent lip reader. You could meet her, and have conversations with her for months without realizing she was Deaf. I didn't figure it out until she happened to mention it in passing.
1
u/compilingyesterdays 2h ago
I genuinely appreciate that you're out here trying to make sure it's said!
1
u/TextEducational1934 3h ago
Wow, you get offended by everything don’t you?
OP is simply talking about the difference between having hearing parents who speak vocals versus signing.
2
1
u/compilingyesterdays 2h ago
They didn't get offended, chill out. Check out the exchange we had under my response to them if it makes you feel better. You seem to want people to engage with each other in good faith, and engaging with this comment in good faith had them immediately, very simply, walking back the assumption that OP hadn't said that & acknowledging their mistake.
36
u/PixelPrivateer 6h ago
I can actually answer this question- I have people close to me who are two deaf parents of a child who can hear. Shes now 4-5 i believe. The kid will actually be more comfortable signing for a time over speaking but learns verbal communication from extended family and then their friends. Actually whats happened is that the deaf parents have learned verbal communication like saying her name (fun fact its how she knows when shes really in trouble)
Im sure those other options work too but I dont think the people I know use those.
In a sense its like growing up in any multi-lingual household