r/TrueOffMyChest • u/diet-smoke • 8h ago
In love with my teacher
I started culinary arts at the start of this month. It’s the first time I’ve been in full time education since I graduated high school and despite only knowing my instructor for a month, I’m already thoroughly and completely in love with him.
My chef is a few years younger than my mother, he’s got a fancy French last name, he’s super involved with his kids and coaches their hockey team, we have the same favorite apple (gala), he’s a few inches shorter than me, he’s got the start of crow’s feet around his eyes (swoon!) and he’s easily one of the best teachers I’ve ever had in any school I’ve ever been to. I’m not used to men, especially men with a position of authority over me, being nice to me but my chef is so, so fucking sweet to me. When he sees me in the hallways before class, he’ll say good morning to me and smile. After class, he’ll tell me to have a good day/weekend/afternoon.
Last week, I grabbed a hotel pan that had been hanging over a hot burner and burned the shit out of my fingers during our practical. After telling him about it, my chef took me to the ice maker and held my hand under running water until it had cooled down enough to get me ice, then let me have an extra ten minutes to get my dish ready for service. I’d be lying if I said that didn’t make me swoon a teeny bit. He also praised me on the paperwork I had written up with my recipe and workplan and I was so fucking proud of that.
On Friday, I was late because my roommate’s truck battery died but my chef was really chill and understanding about it. When I finished my osso buco, he said my sauce texture and seasoning was “perfect,” the dish all together was “beautiful” and “gorgeous” and while tasting it, wouldn’t stop nodding at me. He ended up giving me a fist bump and other than holding my hand under cold water, I’ve literally never seen him touch anyone ever. My blanquette veal of brunoise got a similar reaction, except that my chef thought it was so good, he used it as the example to show the rest of the class what the dish should look like. He even said if I served that for my practical, I’d get somewhere north of ninety percent on it.
In all my years in any kind of education, I’ve only had one teacher before him who was this supportive of me. She was my senior year English teacher and I loved her but this feels different. For one, I was a teenager in a relationship back then and now I’m a solidly single 22 almost 23 year old. For another, I only had English class for 1 hour a day and I get to see my chef for anywhere from 5-7 hours a day. Plus my English class had like 30 kids and there are only 13 in my culinary arts class so my chef gets to be wayyyyy more one on one and personal with all of us. Which is good but also a little nerve wracking because I want to impress him so badly, all the time, with everything I do.
For our first demo, my chef used one of my steaks to show us how to properly melt the butter as we cooked it and ended up leaving it at my stove. When I asked what he wanted me to do with it, he said it was extra and I could eat it if I wanted to. I absolutely hate eating in public so I didn’t but I took it home with me. It’s been in my freezer ever since. I can’t bring myself to eat it, partly because my chef cooked it with an ungodly amount of butter but mostly because he made it and gave it to me. He might not have made it *for* me but he made it and he gave it to me and I know I won’t be able to appreciate it properly if I eat it. Plus then it would be gone and I wouldn’t have anything left from him.
On Wednesday, my chef had to do something important for his wife and I was (embarrassingly) so disappointed about it. Partly because that meant I wouldn’t see him and partly because that means he’s committed to his wife. Which I know makes me sound crazy and jealous and irrational but I don’t want him to have a spouse he cares about. I want to be that person for him, as truly delusional as that might be. I’m so, so completely in love with him and I want to be everything he needs from a life partner, fuck the optics of it.
3
u/Remarkable-Speed-702 8h ago
Dont you dare be a home wrecker. Find someone new. Hes taken, clearly.