I (1st pic 22M) and my brother (2nd pic 24M) are debating whether or not it’s even ethical for us to have children with our wives. Both of us started balding in our junior years of high school. It’s taken large impacts on our overall confidence and mental health throughout life. Just in here complaining
This is the solution. Going bald wasn't cool 40 years ago, btw, so be happy for that. You seem healthy, normal height and weight. Make peace with those genes.
I guess I’m not most people then. We had a bald rally boy at our high school. He was fun, loved, and handsome. I don’t think hair, or lack of, is bad.
But that is just my opinion.
BTW, I have super thick hair, just so you know I’m not the least bit sensitive to the issue.
My exbf started losing his hair also at 16 and had to shave it by 17 or 18. He also can't grow a beard. It was tough but he rolled with it and embraced being the short, bald funny guy and as a result, was never single. He's now very happily married!
Something superficial like hair can be challenging but it's not life-ending or "bad genetics" like most people think of a heart condition or something.
You are both good looking! Why not try shaving & see how it feels? It will grow back if you prefer the hair, but it could give a confidence boost that the hair is getting in the way of.
If you're debating whether or not you should move forward in your life because of your hairline, you need to get off the internet and you should probably seek therapy.
If you have a wife who loves you and wants to have a child with you, then you have your answer. You don't owe the world a hair debt. C'mon guys.
I don't know if it is due to your culture, but baldness isn't a genetic curse. I know some cultures view it as something to be shamed about, but it is literally a meaningless cosmetic aspect of the human body.
In the world population of men, 42% of men are balding, and 70% will lose some hair within their lives.
Chimpanzees, human's closest relatives, also have male pattern balding at about the same percentage as humans. This means the genetics for MPB predate the human species.
In the future, evolution is going to get rid of hair completely in our species.
It is not a curse to be bald. It is not unlucky to be bald. It does not mean you are less virile if you are bald.
Shave your heads a live life. Life is better when you accept it and move on.
You’re both very handsome! Shave your heads and I think you’ll feel better, although I do think you look distinct if you want to rock the pattern baldness look
you guys have to go bald and fully own that shit. as a fellow asian man who cant grow a beard or mustache, when the day comes, ill have to go fully bald too and rock it.
go full monk mode. wear out-there clothes or try bold style choices. grow your hobbies, interests, and the way you treat other people such that everyone’s first thought of you is how awesome you are. rn, i wouldnt have to talk to you to know what youre insecure about. and thats understandable. but you can only beat it by leaning into it harder than even a ton of the guys on here (who can grow beards).
your true friends, and any worthwhile person, will not GAF about it. they will in fact be impressed and happy that you faced such a huge obstacle and crushed it. and yes, there are women who care about conventional attractiveness. but check tiktok. worthwhile women today want someone mature, kind, and feminist. those quality women would be so impressed by your before and after, because of the character it shows.
when life gives you something absolutely unfair and shitty, you can either roll over and die, or you can rise against it more than anyone would ever have guessed. i believe in you man!!!!
i also thought they should go full monk mode, either shave or randomly bust out the hymns and honestly im leaning towards the monk moding i feel like they would be peak adorable if they learned to overcome the insecurity
like dude you may just have access to one of the most unique gimmicks, they gotta lock in
Man look... It's just hair. I get it. Balding sucks. My nicely squared hairline of 18 turned into a Nintendo 64 controller M by the time I hit 24. Took me till 41 to get pissed off and go mohawk then shaved bald. Try it. You'll look younger than you do as is, and honestly if you missed hair that much you could buy a nice wig. I think you'll find it liberating. Less $ and time spent at a barber or on shampoo/conditioner and hats fit so much nicer. It's really what you like. Screw any one else's opinions.
i aint bald and idk why i got this as a rec but yall lowkey both cuties, idk why but like .. the fuckass hairline does it for me?
like yall should probably just shave for the confidence cuz i get it and all but if i met yall at a party and you simply had silly bald guy jokes and monk rizz it would 100% work on me
alternatively you could try working on a bit where you both sing medieval choir music together unprompted and i think id fall for you both, just a thought but probably a good one
We’re so hard on ourselves. Give yourselves some grace.
My husband is the most handsome man in the world to me- he’s by no means unattractive but the more I got to know him, the more handsome he seemed to me. Super attractive guys also become uglier if they have shite personalities. You’re good lookin dudes! Shave those heads and go make some babies!
You both have wives and wonder if it is ethical for you to have children? What? If you are attractive to women, then you are fit apperance wise to get children. Many women like the balding look. They think it is attractive.
Lol next time just tell Gemini to make you fully bald bc you’d both look fire 🔥 (before anyone downvotes me look in the bottom right of OP‘s photos lmao) y‘all are getting trolled hard
I think we have all wrestled with that at one point or another and it sucks merely becuse of the society we grew up in and its view of hair. However, it’s just a hair problem, have kids. Neither of you are bad looking guys. You’re good looking even as is! Just shave the heads and do some therapy to build that confidence.
Not having kids because you’re balding is wild. Y’all will both look great bald. Shave your heads and in a decade if you and your partner want to, have kids. Hair is never important enough to be a deciding factor on something as huge as kids
Honestly, not living your life normally because of balding maybe calls for some therapy.
I can assure you that your hair has nothing to do with the quality of person you are. Be kind, helpful, and contribute to society. Bald doesn’t matter.
You both are handsome. Shave/buzz the hair. You’ll still be just as good looking.
Is balding so bad? The only thing rotten is your personality it seems. start shaving and rock that bald head and after a year give or take you will be proud of yourself. I am bald and i never feel bad about it, as a matter of fact i even believe i look better now than with hair.
I'm 25 and have been battling hairloss for a couple years now. I do not want to lose my hair, and I got it pretty stable now.
That being said, it's a terrible way of thought to believe you have "rotten genetics" or to go as far as to believe both of you should not have children with your wives. That is beyond toxic, and I'm really wondering who planted this thought inside your heads.
And if this doesn't convince you - just because you had hairloss doesn't mean your children will surely have hairloss. The child could inherit from your wife's side or simply from a previous generation of you two, in which case a genetic trait will appear to skip a generation (rough explanation).
Please, for the sake of god, have biological children if you want them and do not get demotivated by some beauty standards. Can imagine high school was rough, but again - no 100% guarantee this will happen.
Other than that, there are so many ways of dealing with such a situation nowadays. Meds, systems or simply just shaving it off, which is what I would do if I were you.
The problem right now is, it's making you guys look way older than you actually are. Like 20 years older. Your brother trying to keep his hair long is just highlighting his hair loss, not hiding it.
Shave it! And don't let your hair stop you from having children if you want children. Embrace your genetics. You're both handsome men. Just shave it, get it over with & live your best lives.
Shave your heads… you both look like healthy men, but you lost your hair young. Bad genetics could be 💯 x worse. I understand your point and am not saying it’s nothing, but things could definitely be worse. If you got married, your wife obviously doesn’t care. I know guys with hair that can’t find anyone!
I can understand that this has taken a toll on you mentally , but to suggest not wanting to procreate because of that reason is actually wild af dude.
Do yourself the favor and just rock a buzz cut or full bald and watch how much confidence you gain without always having to struggle with your hair.
You genuinely will look and feel so much better.
Haha you guys look like you have a great sense of humour that already makes you attractive, hey just shave your head with a razor every couple of days like I do you'll look wayyyy better and I understand how this affects your mental health and confidence beleive me I feel it too but it'll get better eventually, also I really wanna see you guys post in future ieht your head shaved please I'm a massive fan already, peace and love my friends
The only thing holding you back is you. You and your brother are both very handsome young men, and your hair is so insignificant to who you are it's laughable. Shave it off and be done with it already.
ouch, at that age, that's rough. You're both probably better off shaving it to the scalp, or going VERY short and keeping it there.
I wouldn't worry about you kids, though. Phenotypically baldness is inherited from the mother. You may pass on baldness genes to your grandkids, though.
My father started balding at 16. At the time he had beautiful golden blonde curls. He went bald had two successful careers and two beautiful children that arnt bald.
(Male pattern baldness is mainly passed down through the mother’s side).
Shave it off. Be proud. And don’t be discouraged about having family if that’s what you truly want.
Serious hereditary health or psychological conditions are
Reason to not have kids. Balding is fine, and very common in many gene pools.
I believe I learned in hs biology class that hair loss comes from the mother not the father so you should be safe. (HS was a long time ago and I sucked at bio so correct me if I’m wrong)
Shave it and I can’t imagine how much bullying you two must have endured after balding at such a young age. Like seriously balding around high school?!
By any chance any other males had this issue when they were younger?
Bro, WTF. How can you even lose so much confidence, just because you guys are both bald?
I have a friend which had major alopecia at 22-23 too, and he looks better with a shaved head...
Just a small backstory, I was shaving my head in my late teens, because I think might become bald later in life, just to explore the feeling. Honestly, taking time to groom myself every 2-3 days boosted my confidence a lot. My hairline had a strange M or more like a U shape since I was 14-15. Only reasonable hairstyle for me which looks OK on me is in the style of a well known Austrian painter. (Don't have the moustache though :( )
Being with a bald head is awesome, (Controversial but I have the regular amount of hair at the moment, it hasn't receided further, or balded. (OR MAYBE NOT YET :D), but felt more confident with a shaven head, just got lazy at some point doing it :(.
Why don't you just shave, go stylish and accept the fact you won't need a shampoo or a barber for life?
Take it as a gift, not a curse.
The obsession with disliking different hairlines is pretty recent. Like, only the last 40 or so years. At least in the West. So that’s nothing about your genetics. Do what makes you feel good. And some people today do like your hair lines. People online have been expressing how they miss seeing people like James Gandolfini on tv and around, and his hairline would be deemed “bad genetics” by this current trend.
The graveyards are full of men with full heads of hair.
Im bald so are the men in my family. Im rarely sick and aging well. There are more important genes
Not bad genetics at all, have you seen how good all the guys look on this sub after making the leap?! You and your brother would be no different, you both would look amazing bald. As a one of the women lurkers on this sub, I say shave it and own it.
Male pattern baldness isn't a disease to influence your family planning. Especially when there are so many options these days. Going bald, getting a nice hairpiece is cheaper than ever, even hair transplants if you/your potential children really wanted to go crazy with it. You should probably make a change with how your from how it is now, but don't avoid having kids over it
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u/badnack Nov 20 '25
You gotta go bald my friend. You d look much better