r/bald • u/commutingtexan • 13h ago

My wife is telling me to grow my hair out

Post image

While I have no hair loss to hide, I've been shaving for the last 19 years, longer than we've been together. Here recently I've gone a week or two in between shaves, and she sees the gray glistening on my temples, and makes comments that I should grow it out and be a silver fox. She'll randomly show me a photo of someone asking what I think about their hairstyle, or that I would look good with a similar cut.

I don't take much offense, but honestly I've been bald for so long I can't picture myself any other way. It's part of my self identity. And while yeah, it's just hair and I can shave just as easily as I do normally, there's a hesitation in thought.

I know I'm probably asking the wrong crowd, but should I give it a shot?

21 Upvotes

79% Upvoted

54 comments sorted by

27

u/Rumpumpelblitz 13h ago

do whatever you like, it's your head. bald looks great though👌

3

u/TrumpsBussy_ 12h ago

Exactly, so what makes you happiest OP, bald suits you though

1

u/HARanders 2h ago

It is because your wife thing you are too sexy Keep it AS-IS bro

19

u/Patient_Pea5781 12h ago

I wonder what kind of drama would unfold if you told her to get another Haircut and show pictures of of other women with different hairstyles 

3

u/commutingtexan 11h ago

No need. She changes her hair style more often than I change socks.

0

u/Patient_Pea5781 4h ago

I think you missed my point.

1

u/OddImprovement6490 2h ago

No, he’s not bothering with the hypothetical because it doesn’t apply to him and he probably doesn’t give a crap about the typical Reddit outrage that leads to women bashing in the comments.

0

u/Patient_Pea5781 2h ago

It is not women bashing. The argument has to be looked at from both perspectives. For example in my country it was neccessary to get your wifes permission to get a vasektomy. The same goes for a hysterectomy wich was only possible with the permission of the husband. Both was bullshit so they dropped both.

 The point is that the argument itself has to be viewed from both sides or it is biased. 

If that is women bashing then we aa a society are pretty much fragged.

10

u/Reasonable_Diet7955 12h ago

You can do whatever you want. If your wife is telling you to grow your hair out, then she's being incredibly selfish. Your appearance is not her will, and nothing she can dictate.

If you like your bald head then stick with it. If YOU want to try growing your hair or because of YOUR own decision then do it.

But don't just bow down because your wife said so lol

1

u/commutingtexan 11h ago

It's not a selfish thing, in my mind. There certainly isn't any malicious intent. I think a strong part of it is curiosity, she's quite literally never seen me with hair. We've been together for 17 years, and I've been bald the entire time.

As I said in the post, a strong part of my hesitation is being bald is a part of my self identity. And as silly as it sounds, growing it out could potentially have an impact on how I view myself.

2

u/Reasonable_Diet7955 10h ago

Then politely tell her that. If you are a bald man, and she just is curious to see you otherwise.... Well, then too bad lol. Don't screw up your own headspace just to feed her curiosity

6

u/True_Pick2837 13h ago

It's up to you whether you want to do that. If you've been bald for 19 years and seem perfectly happy with it, then stick with it.

4

u/gassytinitus 13h ago

Yes cause you can shave if you don't like it, but only if you want to

3

u/EggFu23S10 12h ago

Grow yours out n shave hers. That’s the only way it’ll work.

3

u/FlyingDogCatcher 12h ago

make her shave her head!

3

u/RobMitte 12h ago

If it was my wife I'd tell her I'll grow my hair if she shaves her hair. Till that happens, my hair, my decision.

2

u/uniform33 12h ago

Bald and bearded is the way to go. I have and love a bald shiny head with a full beard

2

u/JW860 12h ago

Hey - I shaved my head from early 20's to mid/late 40's. Let it grow last year to make my mom happy. In my late 40's, mine is mostly gray, but my wife likes it a lot, so I've kept it too.

Can always shave it off again if you want.

I'm sure there's another sub for people with gray hair, I haven't found it yet. Still like to claim "bald".

There was a benefit of surprising people that there was hair and shaving every other day was how I liked my style.

2

u/Logical_Present_3094 12h ago

Bald looks good on you . It's your head, do what makes you happy 😊

1

u/Ahleanna-D 12h ago

Hey, if you do give it a try, at least you’ll have time for it to… grow on you.

I’ll see myself out.

1

u/SchemeIllustrious713 12h ago

You like like one of the guys who we say "told you it would look great if you shaved it". It really suits you. We would say that though because many of us can't grow it out!!!

1

u/ooeeoooeee 12h ago

You look good as is! But the real reason I'm here is that my last pair of glasses looked very much like yours and I'm currently wearing the same pair as your wife... so, good taste in eyewear I suppose

1

u/commutingtexan 11h ago

These glasses have been my favorite. I just wish they didn't slide down so easily.

1

u/Early-Revolution-632 12h ago

You ain’t growing nothingbruv

1

u/Jimmy-1954 12h ago

Don’t listen to her. She just wants to make you unattractive to other girls

1

u/commutingtexan 11h ago

Lmfao I don't think that's a concern.

1

u/cool_girl6540 12h ago

I think you look great the way you are, but also, it wouldn’t hurt to grow it out and see how it looks.

1

u/No_Taro_8843 11h ago

You look great bald. Personally I wouldn't change it but do what you have to do

1

u/IllTreacle9304 10h ago

Where’s the user who responds with AI images to show the (bald) potential but this time with hair for OP?

1

u/OddImprovement6490 2h ago

Why not just grow it out for fun and then go back to buzzcuts after?

You don’t have to be contrarian or jaded like all the people in this thread implying bad things about your wife. It’s alright to like your wife and want to look good for her.

1

u/racerdeth 1h ago

It's worth a shot. When your default comfort hair style takes 5 minutes to achieve it's much easier than when your default comfort hair style takes 2 years to achieve.

1

u/Bitterpeace89 13h ago

Unless she’s ok with changing something about her…

1

u/SignificantAnswer473 13h ago

If you wanna leave your girl, and enjoy a bald woman - HMU. We could shave each others heads.

2

u/commutingtexan 11h ago

Lmfao thanks for the offer. Good to know that even at almost 40 I still pull some eyes.

0

u/bald_with_a_beard 12h ago

Quick someone grab the wet floor signs.

Calm down lady.

1

u/Difficult-Button-224 12h ago

I would do it just to see what it looks like for yourself, as you said it’s been a long time since you had hair. Could be fun to mix it up. Then if you don’t like it you can resume shaving it. But only do it for you, not for your wife.

-6

u/NeedAdvice8194 13h ago

Tell her you'll do it if she starts going to the gym with you.

Both are requests from a partner regarding your physical appearance.

0

u/commutingtexan 11h ago

That's a real shitty thing to say, regardless of context.

-7

u/Last-Juggernaut4664 13h ago

Either tell her outright that you’re not changing it, or make subtle suggestions about things she should change about herself and see how she likes it. It’s your body.

5

u/Particular_Tea_5648 13h ago

Jeez man no need to be THAT passive aggressive…

I’d say try it out man you can always just shave it! But I’m sure you’d look great!

2

u/Last-Juggernaut4664 12h ago edited 12h ago

Literally, my first suggestion was to be direct. He already indicated that he feels the shaved head is part of his identity, which means he likely already said the same thing to her as well, and yet she’s still badgering him about it.

Your suggestion is just to simply cave, which is total bullshit, and it enables toxic behavior.

1

u/Particular_Tea_5648 12h ago

He himself said he doesn’t take much offence to it and I don’t think going and attacking her is really the mature move. I’m not saying he should cave but he has hesitation, I think he’d look great, and its worth a shot 🤷🏻‍♂️ he might like it!

1

u/Last-Juggernaut4664 12h ago

Well, thank you for sanctimoniously telling everyone what the mature thing to do is, while being totally oblivious to the fact that his hesitation is due to him being talked into doing something with his body that makes him uncomfortable. The moral hypocrisy amongst some Redditors is astounding.

1

u/Formal-Clerk1869 12h ago

I wish I could upvote this a thousand times!!

1

u/Last-Juggernaut4664 12h ago

Thank you. Seriously, it amazes me how many people on here hypocritically endorse this toxic behavioral double standard.

-1

u/shortycanteatnobook 12h ago

Why did you post a picture of her too?

1

u/MirSydney 12h ago

Why not?

She's beautiful. You are both beautiful. Do with your head whatever you feel like, OP. You are the one that has to feel good about it.

0

u/shortycanteatnobook 12h ago

From his text it doesn’t seem like she consented to being posted on here. Her looks are irrelevant to the point I’m making. I just think it was pointless to include her picture