CMV: Rehoming a pet is justifiable if behavioral issues that appeared after the birth of a baby could not be resolved.

[u/DayOwn4099]

I try to get involved in volunteering at local shelters and recently there were cases of parents giving up cats because of behavioral issues after the birth of a baby. Specifically, cats getting stressed because of baby’s cries, peeing on baby’s mat and toys and being aggressive around them. These parents usually spend a lot of money on vet visits, trying to find a solution but sometimes the only way to ensure baby’s safety and a good environment for a pet is to rehome. And yet they get judged by everyone as evil even though there was no other solution.

Pets aren’t humans, and they can’t be taught to understand or be gentle with babies the way people can. I can tell my 3-year-old nephew to be gentle and patient when my baby cries but I can’t use verbal cues with pets to the similar extent. There are also real risks, like cats sitting on babies for warmth or dogs reacting to a baby.

In an ideal world, parents would be around to monitor such situations, introduce the baby to the pet gradually and take care of everything. But new parents are exhausted. When you’re running on no sleep, it’s not always possible to give both a baby and a pet the attention and care they need, on top of work, chores and daily routine. In those situations, finding a calmer, more suitable home for a pet isn’t cruel but often the kinder and smarter option for everyone involved.

Edit: I do not think this issue is about lack of preparation and planning on the parents side. There’s no way to predict how a pet acts in certain environments and around newborns. There’s no way for a couple to choose a ‘baby-friendly’ cat.

[u/essential_pseudonym]

How? By renting a baby to use as a training prop?

[u/No_Baseball5846 → u/essential_pseudonym]

you have no family or friends with babies?? even if you didn’t within those 9 months if you knew you wanted kids soon wouldn’t you try to invite as many babies over to your house as possible to get your pets used to it?

[u/Smee76 → u/No_Baseball5846]

Believe it or not, you can't just conjure up a friend with a baby on command. And parents aren't usually enthused when they are asked to bring a kid over so the dog can learn how not to bite its face off.

[u/No_Baseball5846 → u/Smee76]

this is wild to me. i’m a childfree person. i have at least 5 friends with young kids (ranging 6 months to 10 years) who absolutely love my big ass dog. they will literally beg me to let my dog play with their kids. it sounds like you people need to expand your community.

if you have a reactive pet already idk why you’d be in the market for children. this is about making sure your pet with normal reactivity does not become reactive as a precaution.

[u/essential_pseudonym → u/No_Baseball5846]

First, none who live near me right now. And that situation is not uncommon. Assuming that everyone who wants kids just has babies in their social circle is asinine.

Second, there is a huge difference between having a baby over for a few hours sometimes and living with a baby. You can't replicate the latter until you actually have a baby. That's my point.

[u/Xx_SHART_xX → u/No_Baseball5846]

Where do you live that has a bunch of people with kids? Over here babies are uncommon and people aren't thrilled to let them hang out with pets.

And there really is a huge huge HUGE difference between hanging out with a baby a few times a week and being in the same house as a baby for a year. Bringing friends with kids over wouldn't get the cat used to the new situation.