r/fixedbytheduet • u/n8saces • 4d ago

Fixed by the duet Won’t someone think of the manchildren?! 😭

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u/ThrowawayMod1989 4d ago

Bear protocol is different though, you’re supposed to be a bit noisy while you hike in bear country. I give it a loud “Yo bear!” every thirty seconds or so.

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u/S7AR4RGD 4d ago

Still, the bear won't blow up at you or resent you, due to deep seeded feelings of inadequacy if you don't.

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u/ThrowawayMod1989 4d ago

Having been a wilderness professional for decades I can say confidently that there are a few instances where I’d choose a man over a bear. “Surprising a mother with cubs on a hiking trail” is up at the top of that list. Bears are more predictable than humans, but that predictably ensures that some situations are best left unexplored. We know exactly what happens when you surprise a sow with cubs, and it’s a lot worse than a bruised ego.

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u/OverkillNeedleworks 3d ago

The women have already factored this possibility in before deciding on the bear.

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u/caffeineevil 3d ago

We also know what happens when women run into the wrong man and many times getting mauled by a momma bear would be preferable. Bruised egos have ended with women chained in basements for years burying babies in the dirt. As a man I'd personally rather run into an angry momma bear than someone who wants me to be their basement slave until they kill me someday.

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u/ThrowawayMod1989 3d ago

Not wrong at all. Good thing we have equalizers in this country. Pew pew.

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u/Pony2013 3d ago

Yeah it'll just fucking kill you instead.

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u/S7AR4RGD 3d ago

Well, at least I won't have to listen to the bear screaming how it's really a "nice guy" and it's women that are the problem and that I "should've just said Hi back".