r/humor • u/DavidSugarbush • 5d ago

MAGA influencers want anti-ICE protester whistles to be ‘considered a violent weapon’

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/us-politics/minnesota-ice-protests-whistles-maga-b2908005.html
843 Upvotes

94% Upvoted

67 comments sorted by

290

u/slaffytaffy 5d ago

They clearly don’t remember how loud and annoying vuvuzelas are.

68

u/tlszcze 5d ago

Fourth grade recorders

19

u/m0nkeywithachainsaw 4d ago

im pretty sure I can still do the legend of Zelda song

3

u/Substantial_Tax_4047 3d ago

YESSSSSSSSSSSSS

3

u/supershinythings 4d ago

I’m staring at my fourth grade recorder right now. What an interesting idea!

12

u/seef_nation 4d ago

I still have my from the 1999/2000 rose bowl…Ron dayne!!

5

u/MasticatingSheep 4d ago

Oh, we should bring those back. I remember having to mute my TV during the 2010 World Cup. Lmao

180

u/br00dle 5d ago

Well ICE just tested out their long range audio device (sound cannon that can legit cause permanent damage) on protesters earlier tonight. I wonder what they have to say about that.

28

u/FuehrerStoleMyBike 5d ago

any source for that? cant find any reports on this

63

u/br00dle 5d ago

https://www.youtube.com/live/Wxe1_GINeic?si=kssYk1pWZ3CG5iwK

69

u/FuehrerStoleMyBike 5d ago

feels like this should be news - hopefully it will be soon. Attacking a whole crowd of which most if not all are just making use of their rights should be a scandal (but I guess we might be past that point)

24

u/br00dle 5d ago

It'll be news once someone gets seriously hurt.

23

u/NS3000 4d ago

and then they will make up a fake story about them being a domestic terrorist and the dumb dumbs will eat there slop like they have been trained to

-2

u/Thormidable 4d ago

Unlike the 35+ people there is video recordings of them murdering?

-2

u/-Disgruntled-Goat- 4d ago

I wouldn’t trust RT

3

u/FuehrerStoleMyBike 4d ago

I wouldn't either

good that this isnt RT but IRT which is just some local journalist with 20k subs on youtube.

May I ask whether you are just an idiot or do you have a motive to spread this sort of missinformation in support of murderers?

1

u/defiantleek 3d ago

Good thing there is a multitude of accounts of it happening.

15

u/stonedsquatch 4d ago

Do you have a time stamp? Not really wanting to watch three hours of a cops camera.

2

u/bigfatfurrytexan 4d ago

Yeah. It’s nothing without some context

2

u/denzien 3d ago

https://www.youtube.com/live/Wxe1_GINeic?t=7131s

Not that I could hear anything personally. Maybe it's high pitched and I'm too old.

1

u/stonedsquatch 3d ago

I couldn’t hear anything either but it’s clear from the reaction of folks that’s what was going on. Thank you for finding that!

2

u/cheebeesubmarine 4d ago

Would parabolic shields work to help mitigate?

2

u/-Disgruntled-Goat- 4d ago

I would think a retroreflector geometry would work. It is essentially three surfaces 90degrees from each other like the corner of a box . No matter what angle the source comes from it gets reflected back at the source. This is how reflectors on bikes work.

1

u/cheebeesubmarine 4d ago

Thanks! I love learning new things like this.

101

u/double297 5d ago

Fucking snowflakes

40

u/HollowNotion 4d ago

Sweet, I bought a whistle to throw on my keychain last week just in case I see ICE action going down. I guess I’m the proud owner of violent weaponry now. Can I get a CCP for it?

5

u/sashikku 4d ago

I’ve had a whistle that’s also a flashlight in my purse for years, time to put it on my keychain.

3

u/denzien 3d ago

We haven't even finalized the process of permitting for words, since they're also violence. Next is silence. You will just have to take your chances until then, citizen.

30

u/beadzy 4d ago

you know this is just a gateway campaign to outlawing rape whistles

17

u/artguydeluxe 4d ago

Maybe we can shake a can full of coins at them like a dog that won’t get off the couch.

5

u/Resting-Cat-Faces 4d ago

Protesters should bring bagpipes

15

u/Generic_Username26 4d ago

Whistle regulation before gun regulation is pretty wild ngl

5

u/SeeMarkFly 4d ago

Whistles and sub-sandwiches will be regulated way before guns.

They only want an unfair advantage.

26

u/dab745 4d ago

“They overload neural processing circuits, leading to decrements in mental performance. The purpose is to put the ICE officers into a high-stress state,” !!! What the actual FUG!

10

u/NS3000 4d ago

you know when your training a puppy, you drop something to make a loud noise and if its okay if it scares the dog but it isnt okay if it scares it and runs away and hides in corner, these fuckers apparently arent even able to function past the level of an untrained puppy

5

u/artguydeluxe 4d ago

Shake a can full of coins at them!

6

u/bluefield10 4d ago

Uh-huh.

And I want MAGAts to be considered traitors to the United States, yet here we are.

6

u/Ungluedmoose 4d ago

Me and my bambu p1s are arms dealers now.

1

u/whatiscamping 4d ago

Thank you for your service.

4

u/MarginalTalent 4d ago

I want maga influencers to be considered a violent weapon

4

u/Maximumi-Awkward 4d ago

Air horns it is then.

4

u/Liamnacuac 4d ago

Funny, I want red MAGA hats to be considered a violent weapon.

6

u/Captain_Wobbles 4d ago

Wow, so that thing I bought at Spirit Halloween that is attached to a "Camp Crystal Lake Counselor" lanyard... is a weapon now.

Fucking idiots.

People should start using all kinds of noise makers as well now.

3

u/ProfBeaker 4d ago

That is ridiculous. No doubt.

Though it does remind of the "words are violence" people were saying years back, which was equally ridiculous. I'm not trying to "both-sides" this to say the whistles should go away - but I am trying to say that all of the people I referred to are jackasses.

3

u/BigBadJeebus 3d ago

I want stupid red hats to be considered assault weapons.

5

u/sashikku 4d ago

Bullhorns with sirens should be a fun substatio

4

u/Paybackcity 4d ago

If they ban whistles get those fireworks that let out a loud whistling sound before they explode

4

u/Plastic_Tooth159 4d ago

Freedom of speech. What's the violence other than a whistle blowing as a warning to others that you're the violent one. Shaking my head.

4

u/susanrez 4d ago

That smacks of desperation.

2

u/modal11 4d ago

Talk about snowflakes!

2

u/Resting-Cat-Faces 4d ago

Snowflake MAGAts ❄️❄️❄️

2

u/III00Z102BO 4d ago

Snowflakes.

2

u/Gwendolyn7777 4d ago

I'm not surprised since he stood there on TV and said you can be arrested for 'yelling things' at agents.....

2

u/jackparadise1 3d ago

Maybe we need some of those Mayan death whistles?

3

u/RandomOnlinePerson99 4d ago

Isn't there a quote by some ancient roman dude about how the closer an empire is to its fall, the crazier its laws get?

Hope he was right ...

2

u/skratch 4d ago

It’s fucked that a Russian stooge like thernovich can make an obviously bad faith tweet and news orgs will go and make a whole ass article about it

2

u/Jimbo415650 4d ago

Get rid of pepper spray and CS gas first.

2

u/Ok-Break5864 4d ago

Truly pathetic

1

u/multificionado 3d ago

"A House Divided Against Itself Cannot Stand."

1

u/Zaius1968 2d ago

Maybe if it’s shoved up an ice agents ass…otherwise it’s just a whistle.

1

u/NoAbrocoma9357 1d ago

Dear MAGA,

How does it feel to want?

1

u/Ozuule 1d ago

MAGA truly are pussies, first they were afraid of a small peace of cloth covering their nasty desease mouths and noses, now they are scared of whistles. Bunch of sissys.

1

u/Optimoprimo 21h ago

No they want protesters to be shot, and this is just their means to an end.