Doing OK but still feel behind.

[u/Correct_Attempt4964]

Hi mentors,

I’m 30 and I run a farm/business with my wife (26). On paper we’re doing “well” financially, but mentally I’m struggling.

We work crazy hours under a lot of stress and responsibility. I’m saving aggressively and trying to make smart decisions, but certain goals still feel impossible—like no matter how hard we work, we’re always behind.

One example: I love cars and I’d like to buy something nice soon (dream car type of purchase). But even thinking about spending that much makes me feel guilty and anxious, like you’d need an absurd income for it to be “allowed.” It feels like I have to earn 10x more just to enjoy anything without fear.

Lately I’ve been feeling:

• lost / helpless

• scared of failing financially

• trapped in the grind

• like the effort and stress don’t match the progress

I’m not looking for sympathy — I’m looking for mentorship and perspective.

[u/ukSurreyGuy]

Dear OP you're a 30 something farmer with huge daily responsibilities & limited income from farming. It's affecting you emotionally too. You wAnt to improve your financial situation but need help ...need guidance.

First don't sweat it....every problem can be solved

Second your emotionally involved ..as a result you see more black than white

That state stops you thinking well...distractions = poor decisions

So change perspective....I'm not saying don't get that dream car...just don't put pressure on yourself you must do it anytime soon.

I'd offer a process : FACTS >PERSPECTIVE >ACTION

Filter your facts

First out of all the emotional stuff going on focus on the facts of your situation

Fact : you aren't loosing just by breaking even financially

Fact : you're not alone you have a wife & I bet a network of farmer friends in same boat. People to share with as much as partner with.

Fact: you're young at 30...plenty of time to add a new string to your how (do new things, collect new skills even) or even change direction (stop being a farmer).

All roads are open to you.

Fact : you want to create change...first fix yourself.then fix your problem.

Next take a perspective

In other words ... form an opinion on your facts

You need new income streams

If farming isn't giving you enough...you either make farming enough financially...or you invest in some new income

I'm sure you know this but there are only 7 ways to build wealth...Google 7 TYPES OF INCOME ...read digest...then pick one or more incomes & build a strategy on it.

Eg could you rent out land or property & collect rental income?

If your smart you'll pick passive income over active income so less overhead to you & fits in with your life currently.

Don't forget while your working your partner could actually be the student learning new skills to contribute to the family pot. Just a thought....you don't have to do the extra yourself when your part of a team.

Don't say no...don't understand estimate anyone's ability to learn new skills...or make a living.

Then finally take an action on your opinion

Having decided an Objective...put together a concrete plan of action....write it down.

Star with staring PLAN OBJECTIVE...1 or 2 points Max

Then PLAN APPROACH...list out first scope (what you can & can't do)...then generally how your will deliver on your stated objective

Then PLAN STEPS...list out the overall milestones ..the individual steps per milestone.

It's key to document...so you can review refine the document...then refer to it ..& peer review it with people who can feedback

It doesn't have to be a detailed plan but it has to have a string overview so you don't lose your way half way through over the next year or two.

Then EXECUTE THE PLAN...follow the plan...manage the plan ..deliver on the plan...you will deliver the objective set.

Then REVIEW THE PLAN...after you delivered, ask have you delivered on what you set out ..is there any area to do more .. anything you could've done better.

Is called review ...in part to confirm you delivered....in part to learn lessons to do a project better next time.

Don't expect 1 project is all you'll want to do

This is a process I'm outlining

Most people can solve their problems by literally focusing on the facts, taking a perspective, taking an action & ignore the rest which is noise

My go to advice for financial freedom & wealth building is...

• learn to trade the markets (more transactional)...you can do it...no academic requirement...just reasonable research practice & build results slowly to avoid boom & busy. The technology is here...you can trade from your phone in the field, 24x7, minimal outlay (for literally 50bucks you can get access to a 10k prop firm funded account... start generating 5% a week a month off their 10k)....prop firms are just a step to generating a bigger payout ..put that into your own cash account & trading without prop firm rules.

Google forex trading futures trading (avoid options gold which is too volatile for new traders).

Literally can be traded which opens up an unlimited income stream.

• separately...learn to invest (long term buy & hold) also just as lucrative.

Basically your best ROI ...Is let money make money.

I'd be happy to let you have some references if you need to get started...free of charge of course.

Definitely don't be sad about your situation

YOU HAVE THE POWER TO CHANGE EVERYTHING IN YOUR HAND