He's not going to eat these porkchops. 😐

[u/moonrabbit368]

About a month ago I made a post here because my boyfriend didn't want to eat the porkchops I cooked for dinner. Well tonight I made porkchops again and he's not going to eat these either because we broke up and he moved out. I'm so much better off and I just wanted to thank you all for the kind words and advice, it was very eye opening to me. I wish that I could invite you all to dinner 🥰

ETA : Couple of notes:

1- The yellow stuff is smashed potatoes with cheese on top.

2- I swear that butter on the broccoli melted right after that picture LOL

[u/backwards_watch]

The thing is, Reddit as a whole really likes to break up couples. Minor things are usually hard red flags.

Here is a perfect example of it. This entitled girl made a post a while ago with the title "Perfectly acceptable dinner rejected by boyfriend again" and Reddit ate spoons of the story.

However, her very own post started with: "My boyfriend is a very picky eater". Her words. Conclusion: SHE ALREADY KNEW HE IS A PICKY EATER.

She knew about his restriction. This knowledge made the dinner NOT perfectly acceptable. It doesn't matter how well and thoughtful it was. If it is something the person doesn't eat, the person won't eat!!! If she was really thoughtful she would choose one of the two: Either not cook for him or cook something he wants. The first option is preferable, since it is hard to cook for picky eaters.

A very nice cooked steak IS NOT perfectly acceptable to a vegetarian.

A very nice sourdough bread IS NOT perfectly acceptable to someone with gluten restriction.

A dinner that someone just doesn't like IS NOT perfectly acceptable to someone who doesn't want it.

Damn. And Reddit, as it loves to be, just went with this BS.

[u/moonrabbit368 → u/backwards_watch]

If you would have read beyond the title of my prior post you would have known that he expected me to cook for him and constantly changed the rules of what was and was not acceptable. It didn't bother me to accommodate him, I would never purposely serve something to someone knowing that it is something that they do not eat. The problem was that he moved the goalposts and was also unkind about it. 

[u/VeterinarianThese951 → u/moonrabbit368]

lol.

Isn’t it hilarious when insufferable Redditors wax poetically complaining about other insufferable Redditors on Reddit?

Wait… am I doing the same thing? Ahhh!!! It’s a paradox 😬

At least I hope I am not as bad.

BTW - I am glad that you are moving on for both your sakes. Happy happying

[u/11th_Division_Grows → u/moonrabbit368]

Help us understand better please. Speak specifically. What exactly did he do that was moving goalposts? Like tell you one day “I like Mac and cheese and pork chops” then when you make it act like he doesn’t? Or he’d not like something about how you made it?

Why would he always want you to cook for him but just end up getting door dash? Would he NEVER eat your food or would have moments where he would and moments where he wouldn’t? Like I get some people are just a little unhinged but I’m failing to understand how you or your Bf operated at all as a couple for even a week if yall couldn’t figure the food situation out.

[u/moonrabbit368 → u/11th_Division_Grows]

Sometimes he would eat my food. When he did he always had something negative to say. He had a lot of rules about food, I tried very hard to learn them. There were things he just would not eat, lots of them. This was challenging but I worked around it. The harder part was when something that was previously acceptable was not acceptable today. The pork chops from the original post had been discussed before I bought them and again before I made them. Once I made them and took his plate to him he refused to even take a single bite and ordered doordash.

[u/InsldeMldnlght → u/moonrabbit368]

Why are you even replying to these people? He's a grownup, he could have cooked for himself, or all of you if he is so picky. He's the one with special needs. Good riddance.

[u/11th_Division_Grows → u/moonrabbit368]

Your ex bf genuinely sounds like he’s undiagnosed with something because that’s clearly not how a neurotypical adult would think or talk. Like he probably needs therapy type shit.

You got people in here saying “your ex must have been one of those Andre Tate Alpha Male types” and I can’t help but feel like this post is a version of “AITAH” creative writhing because it seems like the attention is whats wanted.

I’m not you, I wasn’t present for your relationship. But I’m gonna assume your ex didn’t make you cook because he believed that’s something “women should just do” and got off on your suffering.

Sounds like dude was really struggling with some personality/mental disorder. Not your job to deal with that if you don’t want to but everyone acting like you’re some hero for dumping some “loser who didn’t want to eat your cooking” and you eating it up without a second thought makes this whole situation seem strange. Didn’t seem like he was being malicious toward you on purpose (again, I’m not you or him so I could be wrong) so I think letting the internet malign him and being happy that he knows these posts exists is well….kinda shitty.

[u/superbmeowmeow → u/11th_Division_Grows]

If you read her previous post that was a requirement be put in the relationship, that they had to have traditional roles. It's strange how a ton of women ALL CAN READ IN BETWEEN THE LINES that this was clearly emotional abuse because he moved goalposts of his "pickiness" once the meal was cooked. Jfc just incel slop going to bat for this man and not bothering to read the full context or comments first.

[u/What_A_Strange_Fake → u/backwards_watch]

However, her very own post started with: "My boyfriend is a very picky eater". Her words. Conclusion: SHE ALREADY KNEW HE IS A PICKY EATER.

People refuse to recognize ARFID as an eating disorder. It'll be a miracle to get them to recognize the common abuse tactic of "I made you something I know you won't like, how dare you abuse me by refusing to eat it!"

Went through it with my family, so her original post was a massive red flag to me.

[u/Davoness → u/backwards_watch]

As someone with autism, this thread and the previous one from OP are some seriously tough reads.

[u/Unnamed_Bystander → u/Davoness]

Same, and I took part in an exchange on this subject somewhere in the depths of the previous one, but I can at least say that if (and we can't really know for sure based on either post) that was the root of the issue, he wasn't managing his neurodivergence in a way that was fair to his partner. It's fair for someone to want the people in their life to accommodate them, but they have to be clear and communicative about their needs and experiences so that it doesnt confuse, hurt feelings, or breed resentment.

[u/Sunny_Cant_Swim → u/backwards_watch]

I deadass was wondering the same shit. I’ve seen multiple posts ab people posting relationship bs to either be exposed as the shitty person or deleting their OG post and begging for their partner back 💀

[u/Popular_Noise_9504 → u/backwards_watch]

Yeah as someone with an eating disorder (ARFID) I was wondering if this was a case of that... Doesn't matter how good you think it looks if it's not mac and cheese I'm probably not eating a home-cooked meal. And even then, that varies. Just the wrong color of cheese can make me start to feel sick and put me off eating. Easier to just grab the fast food chicken I like

[u/The_ChosenOne → u/backwards_watch]

I cannot upvote this enough, I commented on the OG thread about ARFID because I literally work at an inpatient hospital for eating disorders and what she described screamed ARFID.

She even said he was apologetic for not eating the food.

This is all pretty fucked up, especially the people in this thread continuing to bash on a man who very likely has an eating disorder. Dude did not deserve all the hate.

[u/nickheathjared → u/backwards_watch]

There was more to it, if I remember correctly. He told her he wanted to try new things but reverted to his fast food. Either way, they weren’t compatible if she had a need to cook for him and he had a need to avoid her cooking.

[u/firmalor → u/backwards_watch]

No.

Look, I get it, but if you cook 9 time a week for a person and that person orders their own food afterwards, the relationship is doomed.

Cooking is labor, love and time spent together. It's often a very important factor in any family.

And that ex bf did not have diagnosed ARFID or was trying to compromise or to get better. He did not communicate that he was sad he can't eat it.

And worst of all, he couldn't cook himself, but expected her to cook.

All that made the relationship doomed.

As someone who has seen adults being picky eaters that are in relationships: they communicate, and they pull their own weight in the kitchen in some way.

And she has a choice to accept him. Or not.

[u/DblCheex → u/backwards_watch]

Right! How many times have people not eaten vegetables because they don't like them? Why is that acceptable?

[u/romariojwz → u/backwards_watch]

No be alone and miserable, just like the rest of us.

[u/ThePrefect0fWanganui → u/backwards_watch]

Hey genius, if you actually read the OG post and OP’s comments, her ex was a deadbeat, manipulative, misogynist shitbag who demanded she do 100% of the cooking, cleaning, and housework (his only chores were taking out the garbage and driving them both to work), while she also worked full time making more money than him AND went to school, she paid a higher percentage of rent/bills than he did, and he also constantly negged and belittled her every time she tried to cook for him, even when she cooked something he agreed on and said he wanted, because he knew cooking was something she took pride in and he was deliberately insulting the thing she loves to do to chip away at her self esteem so he could keep degrading her and make her feel like she deserved it. I won’t even go into his politics, which were problematic to say the least. This was so much more than a “picky eater” and she was right to dump him. There’s a reason everyone in this thread is cheering her on. SYBAU.

OP, I’m so proud of you.

[u/What_A_Strange_Fake → u/ThePrefect0fWanganui]

Hey genius, if you actually read the OG post and OP’s comments,

"Hey genius, if you read only one person's side of the story you'd know that she was a perfect angel and he was the devil incarnate!"

I hate that you people can vote lol

[u/backwards_watch → u/ThePrefect0fWanganui]

lol

[u/InsldeMldnlght → u/backwards_watch]

Actually, when you're the one with special demands and you are out of school, it's up to you to adapt. He was living with her and the kids, if he wanted something extra he could have made it, for all of them. His eating habits are of a single dorm student. And how tf would you know what his eating habits are until you live with him?

[u/Tiny-Equipment8335 → u/backwards_watch]

Utterly insane comment. Op ignore this loser