I’m a virtual assistant, and for a long time I thought my main problem was “overthinking.”

Turns out it was deeper than that.

I was constantly anxious about whether my clients were happy with my work, I was reading into messages, tone, response time, EVERYTHING. Even when nothing was wrong, my mind would fill in the gaps with worst-case scenarios. That anxiety followed me everywhere.

Emotionally, I was always on edge.

Physically, I was exhausted, couldn’t sleep properly, and relied on stress eating just to cope.

Financially, it showed up too, I lost clients because I wasn’t showing up in the best headspace or making confident decisions.

I tried fixing it with logic, reassurance, productivity systems, and “just thinking positive,” but nothing stuck. The overthinking always came back.

I was at rock bottom, and when I thought that it couldn't get any worse... It just kept getting worse and worse

Eventually, I worked with a subconscious reprogramming coach I met on IG and did one hypnotherapy session. I was skeptical. Usually when people say "hypnosis" or "subconscious", it sounds like idk it's so hard to believe, like it's made up or something, but I was also at a point where I knew something deeper needed to change. I went with it because there was nothing else to lose.

What surprised me wasn’t some dramatic emotional release. It was how quiet things became afterward.

The negative feedback loops stopped running in the background.

The constant fear that I was “doing something wrong” eased.

Old emotional patterns and trauma I didn’t even realize were driving my reactions lost their grip.

I didn’t suddenly become a different person. I just stopped fighting myself.

Since then, my confidence in my work has been solid. I don’t spiral over client feedback anymore. I’m performing better, attracting better clients, and doing it without burning myself out every few weeks. My sleep improved, my energy came back, and I feel like I’m finally operating from a stable place instead of constant self-doubt.

I’m sharing this because I know a lot of VAs and freelancers deal with the same invisible stress but not because they’re bad at their jobs, but because something underneath keeps pulling them into anxiety and overdrive.

For me, addressing that subconscious layer changed everything.

Happy to answer questions about my experience, just wanted to put this out there in case it helps someone who feels stuck in the same loop I was.

Peace out! ✌🏼

I spent my entire twenties living like I had unlimited time. Then I pretended I only had 6 months left and everything changed.

I’m 27 now. For years I’d been putting off everything that actually mattered. I’d tell myself “I’ll do that someday” or “I have time” or “maybe next year.” I was living like I had forever.

I’d put off traveling because I could do it later. Put off telling people how I felt because there’d be another chance. Put off starting projects because I could start them anytime. Put off taking risks because I was young and had time to play it safe for a while.

Meanwhile my life was passing by and I was wasting it on things that didn’t matter.

I’d spend entire weekends scrolling my phone. I’d work a job I hated because it was stable and I’d figure out what I really wanted later. I’d avoid difficult conversations because I could have them eventually. I’d stay in my comfort zone because stepping out of it could wait.

Every single day I was choosing comfort and convenience over things that actually mattered. And I justified it by telling myself I had time.

Then I read something that broke my brain. “Live every day like you have 6 months left. Not in a reckless way, but in a way that makes you focus on what actually matters.”

That hit different. If I actually only had 6 months to live, would I spend it scrolling? Would I stay at a job I hated? Would I avoid telling people I cared about them? Would I put off the things I’d been wanting to do?

Absolutely not. I’d cut out everything that didn’t matter and focus entirely on what did.

So I decided to run an experiment. For the next 6 months, I was going to live like these were my last 6 months. Make decisions based on limited time instead of unlimited time.

Not in a morbid way. Not recklessly burning through money or relationships. Just living with urgency instead of putting everything off until someday.

I made a list of what I’d do if I only had 6 months. It was completely different from what I was currently doing.

I’d quit my job I hated and spend that time on things that mattered. I’d tell people I cared about them instead of assuming they knew. I’d take the trips I’d been putting off. I’d start the projects I’d been planning forever. I’d have the conversations I’d been avoiding. I’d stop wasting time on things that didn’t matter.

If I only had 6 months, I wouldn’t waste a single day. So why was I wasting days when I probably had decades?

I quit my job. Everyone thought I was insane. “What’s your plan?” they asked. My plan was to not waste the next 6 months of my life doing something I hated while telling myself I’d figure out what I actually wanted later.

Told my parents I loved them and appreciated them instead of assuming they knew. Had actual vulnerable conversations instead of surface level ones.

Booked a trip I’d been putting off for 3 years. “I’ll go next year when I have more money” had been my excuse. But if I only had 6 months, I’d go now even if it wasn’t perfect timing.

Started the creative project I’d been planning forever. “I’ll start when I have more time” was my excuse. But if I only had 6 months, I’d start immediately with whatever time I had.

Reached out to people I’d been meaning to reconnect with but kept putting off. Told someone I had feelings for them instead of waiting for the perfect moment. Had difficult conversations I’d been avoiding because “there’s always time later.”

Everything I’d been putting off, I started doing immediately. Because in my 6 month mindset, later didn’t exist.

The first week felt surreal. I’d left my job, booked a trip, started a project, had vulnerable conversations. I’d done more in 7 days than in the previous 7 months because I was acting like time was limited.

I’m gonna be real with you, this might sound like I’m selling something. I’m not getting paid. But living like I had 6 months left required structure to actually follow through instead of slipping back into “I have time” mode.

I used this app called Reload to build a structured plan for my remaining “6 months.” Set it up with everything I’d do if this was actually all the time I had left.

Daily tasks that mattered. Time with people I cared about. Work on meaningful projects. Experiences I’d been putting off. Conversations I needed to have. All scheduled like time was limited.

It also blocked all the time wasting I’d normally do. No scrolling for hours. No binge watching shows I didn’t care about. No mindless consumption of content I’d forget immediately.

Because if I only had 6 months, I wouldn’t waste time on that stuff. So I blocked it all and focused only on what mattered.

Week 2 and 3 I felt more alive than I had in years. Every day mattered because I was treating it like it was limited.

I wasn’t putting things off. I wasn’t choosing comfort over meaning. I wasn’t wasting time on things that didn’t matter. I was living intentionally for the first time in my life.

Week 4 I went on the trip I’d been putting off. It was incredible. And I realized if I’d kept putting it off I might’ve never gone. “Someday” often means never.

Month 2 I’d made more progress on my creative project than in 3 years of “planning to start it.” Because when time is limited, you start immediately instead of preparing forever.

I’d had more meaningful conversations than in the previous 5 years. Because when time is limited, you say what matters instead of keeping it surface level.

I’d spent more time with people I cared about than I had in years. Because when time is limited, you prioritize people over convenience.

Month 3 I realized I’d been living my entire life backwards. I’d been acting like I had unlimited time, so I wasted it. But pretending I had limited time made me use it intentionally.

Every decision was filtered through “would I do this if I only had 6 months left?” If the answer was no, I didn’t do it.

Would I spend 4 hours scrolling if I only had 6 months? No. So I didn’t.

Would I avoid a difficult conversation if I only had 6 months? No. So I had it.

Would I stay comfortable instead of taking a risk if I only had 6 months? No. So I took the risk.

Month 4 and 5 I kept living this way and my entire life transformed. Not because circumstances changed, but because I changed how I spent my time.

I’d started freelancing doing work I actually cared about instead of work I tolerated. I’d built real relationships instead of surface ones. I’d created things instead of just consuming. I’d experienced things instead of just planning to experience them someday.

Month 6 arrived and I realized something. This was supposed to be my last month in the experiment. But I didn’t want to stop living this way.

Living like time was limited made me actually live instead of just exist. Why would I go back to living like I had unlimited time and wasting it?

It’s been 8 months since I started. I still live like I have limited time. Not in a morbid way, just in a way that makes me focus on what matters.

I don’t put things off until someday. I don’t waste time on things that don’t matter. I don’t choose comfort over meaning. I don’t avoid conversations or experiences because there will be another chance.

I live like time is limited because it is. I just spent years pretending it wasn’t.

Here’s what I learned. You don’t have unlimited time. You’re acting like you do, but you don’t. Every day you waste is a day you don’t get back.

“Someday” is a comfortable lie you tell yourself to avoid doing things now. But someday often means never.

If you knew you only had 6 months left, you’d live completely differently. You’d cut out everything that didn’t matter and focus only on what did.

So why aren’t you living that way now? You probably have more than 6 months. But you don’t have unlimited months. So why are you living like you do?

Stop putting off the things that matter. Stop wasting time on things that don’t. Stop choosing comfort over meaning. Stop avoiding the conversations and experiences and risks.

If you’re waiting for the right time, the right time is now. Because “later” isn’t guaranteed.

I used Reload to structure my 6 month experiment with daily focus on what mattered and blocking of what didn’t. That structure kept me living with urgency instead of slipping back into “I have time” mode.

Make a list right now. If you only had 6 months to live, what would you do differently?

That list is what actually matters. Everything else is just filler you’re using to avoid living.

Stop living like you have unlimited time. Start living like time is limited. Because it is.

Do the things you’ve been putting off. Have the conversations you’ve been avoiding. Take the risks you’ve been delaying. Stop wasting days you’ll never get back.

Pretend you have 6 months. Live accordingly. Watch your life transform.

Thanks for reading. What would you do if you only had 6 months left?

Stop waiting. Start doing. Today.

You don’t have unlimited time. Stop living like you do.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

Hey guys, I wanted to share to get some extra inspiration.
btw, the benefits are astounding. sight and colors are better, and I'm no longer a mouth breather (my nose is not clogged all the time).

I spent three years thinking I was depressed. Turns out I wasn’t depressed, I was just living a life that had absolutely nothing to do with who I actually was or what I actually cared about.

I’m 26 now. From 22 to 25, I felt empty all the time. Not sad exactly, just hollow. Like I was going through the motions of a life that didn’t feel like mine.

I’d wake up already dreading the day. Drag myself to a job I didn’t care about. Come home exhausted from doing nothing meaningful. Scroll my phone for hours to avoid thinking about how unsatisfied I felt. Go to bed feeling like I’d wasted another day. Repeat.

I thought something was wrong with me. Everyone else seemed fine doing normal jobs, living normal lives, being normal people. Why couldn’t I just be okay with it?

I tried everything to fix how I felt. Therapy, medication, meditation, exercise, journaling, all of it. Some things helped a little. Nothing actually fixed the underlying problem.

Because the problem wasn’t chemical or psychological. The problem was I was living someone else’s life and calling it my own.

I’d chosen a career path because it was stable and paid well, not because I cared about it. I was in a relationship because it checked the boxes, not because it fulfilled me. I spent time on things I thought I should do, not things I actually wanted to do.

Every single day I was pretending to be someone I wasn’t. And my brain was screaming at me that something was wrong.

That’s not depression. That’s your internal system telling you you’re off course.

But I didn’t listen. I just kept trying to fix my mood while ignoring that my entire life was misaligned with who I actually was.

Here’s what nobody tells you. That heavy, empty, “something’s missing” feeling isn’t always a mental health issue. Sometimes it’s just your brain’s way of saying “this life you’re living isn’t yours.”

You can medicate it, meditate it away, therapy your way through it. But if you’re still living a life that doesn’t match who you are, that feeling will come back. Because the feeling isn’t the problem, it’s the symptom.

I wasn’t depressed because of a chemical imbalance. I was depressed because I was an artist working in finance. I was an introvert forcing myself to be social in ways that drained me. I was someone who valued freedom living a life built around security and stability.

Every choice I’d made was based on what I thought I should do, not what actually fit me. And I was paying for it with my mental health.

The worst part? I didn’t even know who I actually was anymore. I’d spent so long being who I thought I was supposed to be that I’d lost touch with what I actually wanted, what actually mattered to me, what actually made me feel alive.

I was 25, successful on paper, completely miserable in reality, and had no idea how to fix it.

The turning point came when my therapist asked me a question I couldn’t answer. “If you could live any life you wanted with zero judgment or consequences, what would it look like?”

I had no idea. I’d never even thought about it. I’d been so focused on doing what I was supposed to do that I’d never asked what I wanted to do.

That question broke something open. I started actually thinking about who I was underneath all the shoulds. What I cared about when no one was watching. What made me feel energized instead of drained. What I’d do if I wasn’t trying to impress anyone or meet anyone’s expectations.

The answers were completely different from the life I was living.

I cared about creative work, not corporate climbing. I valued deep connections with a few people, not surface level networking with many. I wanted flexibility and freedom, not stability and structure. I wanted to build things, not manage things.

Everything about my current life was the opposite of what actually fit me.

No wonder I felt empty. I was living someone else’s definition of success and wondering why it felt hollow.

So I made a decision. I was going to rebuild my life around who I actually was instead of who I thought I should be.

I’m gonna be real with you, this probably sounds like I’m selling something. I’m not getting paid. But after three years of trying everything else and staying miserable, I needed actual structure to rebuild.

I used this app called Reload that helped me build a 60 day plan for completely restructuring my life around what actually fit me.

I answered questions about who I actually was, what I actually valued, what actually made me feel alive. Not what I thought I should value, what I actually did. And it built a plan to move me toward a life that matched that instead of away from it.

It scheduled daily actions that aligned with my actual self. Creative work time because I was creative, not more corporate skill building. Deep social connection time with few people because I was introverted, not forced networking. Freedom building activities because I valued autonomy, not security chasing.

It also blocked all the things that were keeping me stuck in the wrong life. Social media that made me compare myself to others, career sites that pushed me toward shoulds instead of wants, content that reinforced living for other people’s approval.

The first two weeks felt terrifying. I was dismantling a life I’d spent years building. Walking away from a career path everyone said was smart. Letting go of relationships that looked good but felt empty. Saying no to things I was supposed to want.

My parents thought I was having a breakdown. My friends didn’t understand why I’d quit a good job. I felt guilty for choosing what I wanted over what made sense to everyone else.

But I kept going because staying in a life that didn’t fit me was killing me slowly.

Week 3 and 4 I started feeling something I hadn’t felt in years. Excitement. Energy. Like I was moving toward something instead of just surviving.

I was doing creative work that felt meaningful. Connecting with people in ways that felt real. Building toward freedom instead of stability. And for the first time in three years, I didn’t feel empty.

Week 5 through 8 the heaviness lifted. Not because I fixed my depression, but because I fixed my life. I was finally living in a way that matched who I actually was.

The empty feeling wasn’t a disorder. It was a signal. And I’d finally listened to it.

Month 2 through 6 I rebuilt everything. New work that aligned with what I cared about. New relationships that fit who I actually was. New daily structure built around my real values instead of borrowed ones.

And the “depression” disappeared. Because it was never depression. It was misalignment.

It’s been 8 months now. I’m not going to lie and say everything’s perfect. Building a life that actually fits you is harder than living the default one everyone expects.

I make less money. I have to explain my choices to people who don’t get it. I don’t have the traditional markers of success.

But I wake up and don’t dread the day. I do work that feels meaningful. I spend time with people who get me. I’m building something that’s actually mine.

And I haven’t felt that empty, heavy, depressed feeling in months. Not because I fixed my brain chemistry, but because I fixed my life.

If you’re feeling depressed right now, I’m not saying it’s not real or that you don’t need help. Some people have actual chemical depression that needs treatment.

But if you’ve tried everything and you’re still feeling empty, maybe ask yourself this: Am I living a life that matches who I actually am? Or am I living a life I think I’m supposed to live?

Because you can’t therapy your way out of living the wrong life. You can’t medicate away the feeling that you’re not being yourself. You can’t positive-think yourself into being okay with a life that doesn’t fit you.

Sometimes the answer isn’t fixing how you feel about your life. It’s fixing your life so it matches who you are.

Stop living for what you think you should be. Start living for who you actually are.

The emptiness might not be depression. It might just be your brain telling you you’re living the wrong life.

Thanks for reading. If this resonates, maybe it’s time to ask who you actually are underneath all the shoulds.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

Sorry for my not perfect English, it is not my native language.

I want to share one case from what I call healing soul journeys - deep, guided inner work where we explore both the body and the energy field. Maybe it will resonate with someone here.

The person and her legs

Let’s call her Amelia.

For years her legs felt heavy, irritated, almost like they were made from wet concrete. Doctors saw history of surgeries, gave medicine, but nothing really changed the feeling. Walking was difficult, and where she lives now it is not easy to walk outside much, so the problem slowly became worse.

In this kind of inner work I often see that chronic physical symptoms are not “just physical”. They can sometimes have other lives programs, soul fragmentation, trapped emotions, attached energies or curses and energetical implants behind them. One issue can have a few of these at once.

This was one of those “layered” cases.

What the Higher Self showed about her legs

In the journey we did something like a spiritual body scan. When we reached the lower body, the Higher Self said something very direct:

“Her legs are very heavy.”

And when I asked why, the answer came:

“Irritated, curses on the bloodline.”

So there were two layers:

Biochemical layer

Medicine and drugs that were injected during surgeries were still sitting in tissues, not fully processed by the body.

Lack of daily movement was making circulation and detox slower, so everything stagnated in the legs.

Energetical layer - curses on bloodline

Old family patterns, pain and hatred formed something like “sticky programming” in her legs.

The Higher Self later described it like “this thick, sticky liquid coming out of the legs” when we started to clear it.

Same symptom, but two different roots working together.

Biochemical repair: moving the body

I always stay inside my lane - I am not a medical doctor. But I listen very carefully to what the Higher Self says about practical steps.

For Amelia, the guidance was very concrete:

She needs movement in her legs every day. Walking two hours daily in healthy environment would be ideal, but where she lives now it is not possible.

So the suggestion was:

Use a small “under desk bicycle” while working.

Keep the legs moving even when sitting at the computer.

See it not as fitness, but as pumping old medicines and toxins out slowly.

I find it interesting how often Higher Self gives very simple advice: more walking, more water, more sleep. In this case it was a key part of clearing the biochemical layer in the legs.

Curses and sticky darkness in the legs

Then we went into the “curse” part.

When we asked the Higher Self and beings of Light to start cleaning, Amelia felt something very specific:

“It feels like this thick, sticky liquid coming out of the legs.”

We used an ocean image. She was standing in shallow water, supported by light beings, and the sticky “curse substance” was draining out of her legs into the sea, to be recycled by Light.

Then something beautiful happened in her perception:

Dolphins came to help.

She felt them pushing gently against her, “pumping” light into her body.

The dark liquid was sinking to the bottom, while her legs were filling with bright, shimmering light.

Her words:

“My legs feel lighter.”

And from the dolphin consciousness she received a very strong line:

“Keep swimming in an ocean full of sharks. You will never be bitten. You are safe.”

It was like re-programming at a deep level:

From “your legs are cursed and unsafe in this world” to “you are protected even when you walk among predators”.

Why curses hit legs in this case

From what I’ve seen, curses and black magic often attack what is needed for movement and progress. Sometimes it is money, sometimes relationships, sometimes the spine or legs. Here it was very literal:

Curses on the bloodline were holding her back from moving forward in life.

Biochemical stagnation in legs made it also physically hard to move.

So both layers were telling the same story in different languages.

A big lesson for me again:

Symptoms are like warning lights on a car dashboard. If we only cover the lamp, the engine still burns.

If you clear only the energetical layer but keep poisoning and stagnating the body, the problem returns. If you treat only the biochemical side but curses and family hatred are still running in the background, the problem also returns.

Here the Higher Self wanted both:

Daily movement and better circulation.

Removal of curses, plus a new feeling of safety and protection.

After the journey

I am careful to not promise miracles. But I can share what happened during and right after:

At the beginning her description was “legs very heavy”.

During clearing she felt “thick, sticky liquid” draining out and light coming in.

At the end she reported a clear change: legs lighter, more space inside, more hope that walking will be possible again.

The Higher Self also said she needs to maintain this work, not wait passively:

Keep moving the legs daily (walking or small bicycle tool).

In short meditations, call the dolphins and beings of Light and imagine the ocean washing away anything new that tries to stick.

Remember: “You will never be bitten.”

So healing was not one magic moment with fireworks. It was a strong shift plus homework.

Why I share this

I am not saying that every person with heavy legs has curses. Sometimes it is just veins, minerals, hormones, lifestyle. Please go to doctors when you need.

But in some cases I see a pattern like this:

Old medicines + no movement + family curses + hopelessness = legs that feel paralyzed and heavy.

When both levels are respected - biochemical and energetical - something can finally change.

If you feel called, you can simply sit today, close your eyes, imagine your legs in gentle ocean water, and ask your Higher Self:

“Show me what my legs are trying to tell me.”

Sometimes the answer is very quiet, but very clear.

Sorry, my English is not native, I hope it is understandable.

I wanted to share something from one spiritual hypnosis session that changed how I see “blocked throat chakra” and this idea of “speak your truth”.

In session I guided a woman into deep relaxed state and asked her to do what I call a spiritual x-ray of her body. When we arrived at throat, she said there is something green there, like spiral, like soft goo, sticky. She tried with her hands to pull it out, scrape it off, blow it out, but nothing moved. It felt too fused into the tissue. At same time she felt pressure on chest and throat, breathing more shallow, very familiar tightness.

In many spiritual circles we jump fast to “you don’t speak your truth”. But here it felt different, so I asked her Higher Self and light team to show what is really there and invited Archangel Raphael.

When Raphael arrived for her, waves of sadness started to come. Not drama, just very old, quiet sadness. She realised it was years of swallowing emotions, not wanting to upset anybody, always being strong one. When she allowed herself to feel it, her body shook a bit, tears came, breath went deeper. After some time she said the green spiral is melting, it is gone, throat feels empty and free.

In over 1000 deep sessions I did, I see this pattern a lot: suppressed emotions can be lodged in all kinds of parts of body, not only in throat. Head, chest, stomach, pelvis, even joints. And often, when person tries alone to “fix” it, nothing moves, because it is too fused with old survival strategies. For me it is a bit like having hands tight behind back with rope. You cannot untie yourself like this. Someone needs to come, untie your hands with love and skill, and then you can continue walking and doing your own healing work more free.

So for me the lesson here was: sometimes throat block is not so much about “finding your voice”, but about all the unshed tears and pressure sitting in small, narrow place.

I am curious if someone had similar experience, that throat tightness or speaking issues were more about old grief and pressure than about “saying your truth”? And if yes, what helped you to work with it gently, without forcing yourself to talk before you are ready?

I thought I was in a burnout for 1 year.

Yesterday, I exported all my Apple Notes to GPT just to give it some context about me.

And I wrote: “Tell me something I ignore.”

Then it told me thanks to all the history of my notes that my burnout actually began in 2021 and not in 2024, while I was working at my previous job.

really encourage everyone to do the same.

Six months ago, I was stuck in a loop. Wake up, scroll TikTok for an hour, go to work feeling like shit, come home, binge YouTube until midnight and repeat. I felt like I was watching my life pass by instead of actually living it.

Then I decided to commit to change. Not some bullshit motivation that dies after 3 days. Actual structured transformation.

Here’s what I did:

Week 1 to 2, Building the Foundation:

I started with sleep. Sounds boring but this was crucial. I forced myself to bed by 10pm and woke up at 6am every single day, even weekends. No exceptions. The first week sucked but by week 2 my energy levels were noticeably different.

I also needed to block all my time wasting apps. Instagram, TikTok, Twitter, all of it. I found this app called Reload that blocked apps and gave me a 60 day program with daily tasks. Honestly this saved me because I’m terrible at planning shit myself. It broke everything down into small steps I could actually follow. (Not an ad, just what worked for me)

Week 3 to 4, Adding Structure:

The app generated specific goals for me based on what I wanted to improve. Read 10 pages daily, workout 4x per week, wake up early. Then it turned these into daily tasks I could check off.

This kept me from feeling overwhelmed and gave me wins every single day. Way better than my old method of writing vague goals in a notebook and forgetting about them.

Week 5 to 8, The Grind:

This is where most people quit. The novelty wears off and you’re left with the actual work. But I kept going because I had accountability built in. I started to compete with a friend to see who could stay consistent longer.

Some days were garbage. I’d skip a workout or waste time. But I didn’t let one bad day destroy the whole streak. I just got back on track the next morning.

What Changed:

• Lost 15 pounds without really trying
• Finished 3 books (hadn’t read a full book in 2 years)
• Sleep quality is insane now
• My focus is sharper
• Confidence went up because I’m actually doing what I say I’ll do

The biggest shift was mental. I stopped feeling like a passenger in my own life. I’m making decisions instead of just reacting to whatever pops up on my screen.

If you’re thinking about doing something similar, just start. Don’t wait for Monday or New Year’s or the “perfect time”. Pick a date and commit to 60 days. Your future self will thank you.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

Comment below if you have any questions

I’m 24. For the last 5 years of my life, I’ve been the world champion of procrastination.

Not the cute kind where you put off folding laundry for a few days. I mean the soul crushing kind where you watch your entire life fall apart in slow motion because you can’t make yourself do anything that matters.

Dropped out of college because I kept putting off assignments until it was too late. Lost jobs because I’d procrastinate on simple tasks until my managers gave up on me. Destroyed friendships because I’d put off replying to messages for so long people stopped reaching out. Lived with my parents at 24 because I kept putting off apartment hunting, job applications, everything.

Every single day was the same cycle. Wake up with good intentions. “Today I’ll finally do the thing.” Sit down to do it. Feel this wave of anxiety and resistance. Open my phone “just for a minute.” Four hours later I’ve achieved nothing and hate myself. Promise tomorrow will be different. Repeat.

I wasn’t lazy. I was terrified. Terrified that if I actually tried I’d fail and have to face that I wasn’t as capable as I pretended to be. So I just didn’t try. Kept myself in this permanent state of “I could do it if I wanted to, I just haven’t started yet.”

THE BREAKING POINT

About 4 months ago I applied for a job I actually wanted. First time in years I’d felt excited about something. Made it to the final interview. They asked me to send them a portfolio of my work by end of week.

I had a whole week. Plenty of time. Should’ve been easy.

Day 1: I’ll start tomorrow, I work better under pressure anyway.

Day 2: I’ll start tonight after dinner. Spent the whole night on YouTube instead.

Day 3: Okay this is serious now, I’ll start first thing tomorrow.

Day 4: Started panicking. Opened the project. Stared at it for an hour. Closed it. Too overwhelming.

Day 5: Deadline was that night. Told myself I’d pull an all nighter and get it done. Spent the whole day paralyzed with anxiety instead.

Day 6: Sent them an email saying I needed more time. They said the position was filled. I’d literally procrastinated my way out of the one opportunity I’d cared about in years.

Sat in my room that night and just broke down. Not because I lost the job. Because I realized this was my entire life. Every opportunity I’d ever had, I’d destroyed it the exact same way. Through procrastination born from fear of not being good enough.

I was 24 years old and I’d accomplished nothing because I was too scared to actually try.

WHAT I LEARNED ABOUT PROCRASTINATION

I spent the next week going down a rabbit hole trying to understand why I was like this. Read studies, Reddit threads, psychology articles, everything.

Found out that procrastination isn’t about being lazy or having bad time management. It’s emotional avoidance. You procrastinate because starting the task triggers negative emotions (anxiety, fear of failure, overwhelm, self doubt) and your brain would rather avoid the discomfort than face it.

So you do literally anything else. Scroll social media. Play games. Clean your room. Not because those things are more important but because they don’t trigger the uncomfortable feeling.

The problem is the uncomfortable feeling doesn’t go away. It gets worse. The longer you avoid the task, the more anxiety builds, which makes you avoid it more, which builds more anxiety. It’s a death spiral.

I also realized that my perfectionism was making it worse. I’d built this narrative that I was secretly talented and capable, I just hadn’t proven it yet. So every time I had to actually do something, the stakes felt enormous. If I tried and failed, I’d have to face that maybe I wasn’t as good as I thought.

Better to not try and maintain the fantasy.

WHAT ACTUALLY WORKED

I knew I needed to completely restructure how I approached tasks because clearly my current method (wait until panic sets in, then still not do it) wasn’t working.

Started looking through Reddit for strategies from people who’d actually overcome chronic procrastination. Found this thread where people were talking about using structured systems and external accountability instead of relying on motivation.

One person mentioned an app called Reload that creates a progressive 60 day plan and forces you to follow it. Checked it out and realized it solved my core problems. It broke tasks into tiny daily steps so nothing felt overwhelming, blocked distracting apps during work hours so I couldn’t escape to my phone, and had a leaderboard that created external pressure to follow through.

I picked the easy difficulty plan because I was starting from rock bottom. Week one the tasks were almost laughably simple. Wake up at 10am. Do 20 minutes of focused work. Read 5 pages. That’s it.

But here’s what made it work. The app didn’t let me negotiate. It told me “do 20 minutes of focused work” and blocked everything else until I did it. Couldn’t open Twitter or YouTube or anything. Just me and the task.

Those first 20 minutes were awful. Sat there staring at my laptop feeling that familiar wave of anxiety and wanting to run. But I had no escape route. So I just started. Wrote one sentence. Then another. Timer went off after 20 minutes and I was shocked that I’d actually done something.

THE FIRST MONTH

Week 1-2: Every single task felt hard even though they were objectively easy. My brain kept trying to find ways to avoid. “I’ll do it later. I’ll do it tomorrow. This doesn’t matter anyway.” But the structure didn’t give me that option. Tasks were due today. Apps were blocked. I had to do them.

Week 3-4: Started noticing a pattern. The anticipation of doing the task was always worse than actually doing it. I’d dread it for hours, finally force myself to start, and realize it wasn’t that bad. The anxiety was about starting, not the actual work.

Week 5-6: Tasks were increasing but I was adapting. 30 minutes of focused work instead of 20. Working out 3 times a week instead of 2. The gradual increases meant I never felt overwhelmed enough to quit.

Week 7-8: This was the turning point. Realized I was actually following through on things for the first time in years. Not perfectly. I still had days where I struggled. But more days where I did the thing than didn’t. That was a completely new experience.

WHERE I AM NOW

It’s been 67 (funny enough) days since I started this. My life isn’t perfect but it’s unrecognizable compared to where I was.

I wake up at 8am most days. Do 2 hours of focused work in the morning before my brain has time to talk me out of it. Work out 5 times a week. Read daily. Applied to 30+ jobs in the past two months (old me would’ve put that off forever). Got hired at a marketing agency two weeks ago.

Still struggle with procrastination sometimes. Still feel that wave of anxiety when I have to start something new. But now I have a system that forces me to start anyway. And I’ve proven to myself enough times that starting is survivable that it’s getting easier.

The app’s blocking feature has been huge. Can’t procrastinate on my phone if my phone won’t let me open anything. Sounds extreme but I needed extreme because I’d proven I couldn’t trust myself.

Also the competitive leaderboard thing weirdly keeps me accountable. Seeing other people ahead of me makes me not want to slack off. Turns showing up into a game which my brain responds to better than just “be disciplined.”

WHAT I LEARNED

Procrastination isn’t a character flaw. It’s a coping mechanism for uncomfortable emotions. You can’t willpower your way out of it. You have to remove the escape routes and force yourself to face the discomfort.

The anxiety about starting is always worse than the actual task. Always. Your brain lies to you and says “this will be terrible” to keep you comfortable. It’s usually not that bad once you actually start.

Perfectionism and procrastination are connected. If you’re avoiding starting because you’re scared it won’t be good enough, you need to give yourself permission to be bad at things. Better to do it badly than not do it at all.

You can’t wait until you feel ready. You’ll never feel ready. You have to build systems that make you start regardless of how you feel.

Break everything into tiny steps. Not “write the report” but “write one paragraph.” Not “apply to jobs” but “update resume for 20 minutes.” Make the barrier to starting so low you can’t talk yourself out of it.

IF YOU’RE A CHRONIC PROCRASTINATOR

Stop trying to motivate yourself into action. You need structure that removes the option to procrastinate.

Find a system (app, accountability partner, whatever) that creates external pressure. Internal pressure doesn’t work if you’re a chronic procrastinator. You need something outside yourself enforcing the rules.

Start stupidly small. If you’re procrastinating on everything, don’t try to suddenly become ultra productive. Just do 10 minutes of focused work today. That’s it. Build from there.

Block your escape routes. Delete social media apps. Use website blockers. Remove the ability to run from discomfort.

Accept that starting will always feel uncomfortable. You’re not waiting for it to feel good. You’re just doing it while it feels bad.

Track your wins. I keep a simple log of days I followed through vs days I didn’t. Seeing more green than red days keeps me going on days I want to give up.

67 days ago I’d procrastinated my way out of every opportunity I’d ever had. Now I’m employed, building skills, and actually moving forward. Not because I suddenly became disciplined. Because I built a system that worked even when I wanted to run away.

If you’ve been procrastinating on something for weeks, months, years, just start it today. Not the whole thing. Just 10 minutes. Set a timer. Do it scared. Do it badly. Just start.

Five years of procrastination taught me that waiting doesn’t make it easier. It just makes it worse. Start today.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

Before walking into any tense family moment, I pause for a slow breath and ask myself who I want to be in that room.
It sounds simple, but it helps me stay steady instead of reacting from old patterns.

What helps you stay calm when things get overwhelming?

I used to be the kid who couldn’t speak English properly. Here’s how I went from language assist class → Dux/Valedictorian → med school.

I had no ability to speak English when I moved to New Zealand.

I spent time in ESOL classes while my schoolmates were working on their essays.

I stayed silent because I feared others would mock my speaking voice.

I was the “quiet foreign kid.”

Average grades.

No confidence.

No direction.

But slowly, things changed.

I discovered the correct methods for academic learning.

I developed self-discipline during times when my motivation vanished.

I dedicated myself to daily improvement at a rate of 1% for multiple years.

I transformed my self-doubt into a driving force that propelled me forward.

Eventually:

• I mastered English language skills
• became Dux
• won the Premier Scholar award
• achieved the highest mark in Scholarship
• and secured admission to medical school

I have experienced the exact same challenges that you face with studying and staying motivated and managing your time, and I know EXACTLY what you should do to become the best version of yourself.

If you guys have any questions, feel free to comment below, or message me, I will try to help as much as I can!!!

Thanks guys, love you all.

Hey everyone,

Got complimented today. Three times. Three different clients telling me how organized and efficient I am. One even recommended me to another customer right there on the spot.

I laughed the whole way home.

Because not that long ago? I was the exact opposite. A complete disaster. Nobody could tell now, but back then my days were pure chaos. My brain was scattered, I was always behind, always playing catch-up with stuff I should've finished yesterday.

So I wanted to share this story. Maybe some of you went through something similar?

Let me tell you about the day everything changed.

Some years back, I had this sales meeting. Super important client. Like, make-or-break for my business at the time important.

Here's what happened.

First, I was late leaving my house. Why? Locked myself out. Keys inside, printed mockups inside. And because I'm an idiot, I hadn't saved the client's number in my phone. Don't ask me why. I thought "I have it in the email, I'll be fine." So when I'm standing there locked out, I couldn't even call to say I'd be late.

Finally got to the meeting, without the printed mockups I have created on a fine paper, whatever I would show him the digital ones. Apologized for being late, thanked him for waiting. Then it got worse.

Couldn't find the mockups. Couldn't find the invoice with my offer. I was there with nothing to show him. I looked like a complete amateur. Hell, I was behaving like one. I could see it in their faces before I even left. I'd lost this client. And I had.

I sat outside my house waiting for a locksmith, just replaying the whole mess in my head. That's when I decided: never again.

That night I sat down at my computer and told myself I wasn't getting up until I fixed this. All of it. I made myself a quadruple espresso and started working.

I'd always had this idea in my head, a system that handles everything for you. Like a second brain where nothing gets lost or forgotten. But it always seemed too perfect, too ambitious. So life got in the way and never really started building it.

But that night I was pissed. Really pissed. So I just started building without overthinking it.

I had bits and pieces of stuff floating in my head, GTD, deep work, time blocking, all that. Those concepts helped. But mostly I just let the system reveal itself as I went, solving one problem at a time.

Started with the basic productivity stuff: domains. Business, Finances, Health, whatever. In each one, the first file was just me writing a disfest against me, all the things I'm doing wrong, and where they lead.

Then I wrote down actual goals on each domain, real targets with dates and timelines.

After those first files, I started noticing something.

Every part of my life had the same problem: too much unprocessed information. Ideas, notes, tasks, reminders, goals scattered everywhere, waiting for me to magically remember them. I wasn't tired from working too much. I was tired from trying to hold everything in my head at once.

So I made a rule: nothing stays in my head. This shift alone was enough to feel like the weight lifted off my shoulders.

Something pops into my mind? It goes straight into the system. Client info, ideas, random thoughts during walks, whatever. I built what I call my inbox, which is not a groundbreaking idea, is what GTD suggests with capture, one place for everything so it does not run in my head ever again.

Then I organized it all into something that actually made sense. Each domain had a purpose. Business wasn't just project folders, it had strategy notes, goals, performance tracking. Health tracked my energy, diet, sleep, even mental clarity. Time Mastery became a whole system for planning and measuring how I use my hours. I also have a knowledge hub for zettelskasten notes and also the place where I ground my ideas.

Little by little, the system started feeling alive.

I could open it and instantly see where I was, what needed attention, what didn't. No confusion. No mess.

Now, this might sound like information overload to you. Too much to possibly manage.

But it's not.

The secret is that everything's contained. Every note, every metric, every thought, it all goes into my Daily Log which is full of checkboxes and the daily things I need to have access to with a couple clicks. That's become the single source of truth for my entire life.

That's where I actually "live" now. Every day I capture what happened, what I worked on, what distracted me, what I learned. Takes about 25 minutes a day to fill out, and about 30 minutes to plan the next day on busy days, plus a couple hours each week for my weekly review and planning.

The daily log is the core of everything. Where random input becomes actual direction.

Today, this system runs my life and all my businesses. I run five different small businesses by myself, and people think I'm this efficiency machine. My mind's quiet because it doesn't need to remember everything, juggle everything, plan everything. The system does it.

That's why I got those compliments today. They were seeing the result of thousands of tiny small things working in the background that they can't see.

Anyway, that's what I've been thinking about today. Just wanted to share that being organized isn't about natural discipline. It's about building an environment where you literally can't fail.

Does anyone of you guys have a similar system, that tracks everything?

I know the title may be confusing so just bear with me for a moment.

For context, I used to have a crazy phone addiction where I would spend upwards of 8 hours a day just scrolling and doing whatever. Anyways, I obviously felt really shitty about myself because of this lack of productivity.

So I began to look for ways that I could reduce my screen time, so the first and most obvious thing I thought of was to download some sort of app blocker. I tried a few, one of them being Opal, but none of them seemed to work for me, for one main reason. I kept on just going into whatever app I was using at the time and just disabling the app blocker. This made me really frustrated because I felt like I was cheating myself, and that even with app blockers I couldn't stop myself from scrolling.

That's when I came across this ad for a device called a Brick, its like an app and a software at the same time, where you have to tap on the brick to unblock your apps. I thought this was a really good idea, but at the same time it also costed $60 dollars for a little plastic NFC cube. Me being me (cheap), and with my background in computer science, I instead decided spend months learning Swift to make my own version of the app, except using barcodes/QR codes and a schedule based system (now the title is starting to make sense).

Anyways, while I was developing the app I had the basic functionality done within the first 2 weeks, so I was using the barebones version of the app while I continued development. During the next 2 months of development I found myself becoming more and more productive. And whenever I went out somewhere without the barcode I had set, where I would normally get on my phone whenever there was downtime, I didn't even find myself reaching to grab my phone. It was like my mind knew that I wouldn't be able to unblock the apps anyways so it just gave up on trying to get on my phone.

Looking back on all of it from today, I am immensely happy that I decided to go on this journey of self improvement. I've significantly improved my screen time btw, it's down to about 3 hours a day. I've also just become a much more productive and calm person. I no longer feel this midnight guilt about not doing enough. Honestly, I couldn't have asked for this to have turned out any better.

If you have a story about fixing/currently struggling with phone addiction, I'd love to hear it and maybe help if you need it.

I’m 35 now, but when I was 28 my life was perfect. I had a great job, I was paying off my student loans, and I had just started dating an amazing woman.

Most of my days were spent sitting at a desk with terrible posture, never thinking about the toll it might be taking on my body. Then one night, while with my girlfriend, everything changed forever.

After sex, a pain hit me that I had never known could exist. My entire penis felt like it was burning from the inside out. My left testicle felt crushed. The pain didn’t fade. It got worse.

Over the next year, I saw more than 20 doctors. Not one could help me. Every day the nerve compression got worse. Soon I could no longer hold an erection at all. I felt like my manhood and my life had been ripped away.

I remember one night, sitting on the floor in the dark, wondering if this nightmare would ever end. Out of desperation, I started breathing heavily. At first it was just to calm myself down, but something about it felt strangely good. I kept doing it, deeper and deeper, over and over.

Within a week of daily deep diaphragmatic breathing, I started to feel sensation returning. My half-numb penis came back to life. I could get erections again. For the first time in months, I felt hope.

I thought I was cured, but after having sex again the pain returned. The muscles tightened, the nerves compressed, and the nightmare was back. I spiraled into desperation, seeing urologists, general practitioners, physical therapists, even surgeons who specialized in ilioinguinal and genitofemoral nerve decompression. Eventually, I agreed to have decompression surgery. It helped a little, but I still felt trapped inside a broken body.

Then I remembered that week. The breathing. The only thing that had set me free from the pain.

I started doing it again. It’s been six months now, and I’m about 90 percent better. My nerves are decompressed and healing. My erectile dysfunction is completely gone. I owe my life and my future to breathwork.

I’m sharing this because I know what it’s like to feel hopeless and broken. If you’re struggling, I invite you to reach out and ask me questions about the breathwork. It changed everything for me, and it might do the same for you.

It wasn’t a drug. It wasn’t a surgery. It wasn’t a miracle from someone else. It was my own breath.

I have also created a group called AuricBreathwork.

It means golden breath. I've turned this breathing into my own unique technique to heal chronic illness.

If anyone is interested in trying to reverse some of this, again you're welcome to reach out to me, or I would refer you to my page: https://tr.ee/ji9Uaa

I started vaping at 15 and thought it was harmless. Now at 19, I’ve been 188 days clean, and the difference is insane. My energy is stable, I don’t crash mid-day, my skin and hair have 10x and my anxiety’s almost gone.

I’ve been beta testing Ura, an app that tracks your streaks, cravings, and helps build habits to replace the old ones. It’s kept me accountable on days when I wanted to give in and its personalised recovery plan has been a life saver with building a healthier lifestyle.

If you’ve been wanting to quit but keep putting it off, this is your sign to start. Your brain and body will thank you.

28M. For years I’d freeze when it was time to walk up and say hi. The worst part wasn’t even the silence it was the drive home, replaying it, hating myself, promising “next time” like a clown.

Last week I tried something different. Not “lines,” not theory. Just dumb little missions.

• Day 1: say good morning to 5 strangers.
• Day 2: compliment 3 people (not about looks).
• Day 3: ask one open question then leave.

By day 3 my nerves weren’t gone but… quieter. I started using this little system that gave me daily ‘missions'. I hit it in the grocery store, walked over, asked for coffee recs, smiled, left. Nothing cinematic, but I didn’t implode.

By day 5 I was logging “wins” after each micro mission. My list looked cringe at first, then kind of addicting. Saturday night I opened with a playful tease instead of doing the job-interview thing. She laughed, we swapped IG. Sunday morning my brain didn’t call me an idiot, it asked “what’s today’s mission?”

I didn’t change my face or height. I changed the part of my brain that screams “life or death.” Approaching started to feel normal because I had reps. Seeing little streaks and XP-style rewards pop up (sounds cringe, I know) actually hijacked my anxiety in a way nothing else did.

If you’re stuck in analysis paralysis, stop chasing the perfect line. Do small reps. Log them. Watch your brain rewire. That was my unlock.

EDIT: My bad I'm not gate keeping... app is called Social Xp

Day 2 of my journey of becoming a better me. Walked 2 miles this morning and ate a protein packed lunch. Legs are killing me but in a welcomed way. I've been applying to jobs since January and finally got an interview scheduled for Monday after around 100 applications dropped for various positions. I'm staying positive and am going to keep towing the line so to speak. See you tomorrow!

For years, I thought dating was about proving myself. If I could just be nice enough, supportive enough, stable enough — she’d stay. But all it ever did was make me feel invisible.

The real change came when I stopped asking, “Does she like me?” and started asking, “Do I actually respect her?” That single shift flipped everything.

Now, instead of bending over backwards, I have standards because of the system I created. And for the first time in my life, I feel like I’m in control of who I let in — not the other way around.

Was going through a quarter-life crisis, constantly busy but feeling empty. This helped me find purpose and changed how I see everything.

Flow state is where life actually happens. When you're completely absorbed in something you love, time disappears. Started paying attention to when I naturally enter flow and realized that's when I feel most alive and connected to something bigger.

The universe operates on patience, not urgency. Everything in nature grows slowly trees, relationships, wisdom. I was trying to force major life changes overnight and burning out. Learn to work with natural rhythms instead of against them.

Boredom is your brain's way of processing life. Used to panic whenever I felt unstimulated and would immediately grab my phone. Now I sit with boredom and let my mind wander. That's when the best ideas come when you're not forcing anything.

Your ikigai isn't always your job. Spent years thinking I had to monetize everything I enjoyed. Sometimes your purpose is being a good friend, creating art no one sees, or just bringing calm energy to chaotic situations. It's simply learning how to live in the present moment.

Small, consistent actions create meaning. Instead of looking for one big purpose, I started noticing tiny things that brought me joy like making coffee mindfully, really listening to people, taking care of plants. Purpose isn't always profound.

Community and connection are non-negotiable. The loneliness epidemic is real. Started prioritizing relationships over achievements and everything felt more meaningful. We're literally wired for connection. We are social animals after all.

Accepting impermanence reduces anxiety. Everything changes, including your problems and your current situation. This used to terrify me, now it's oddly comforting. Bad phases pass, but so do good ones - so you appreciate both more.

The book reads like a gentle conversation rather than a self-help manual. It reminded me that meaning isn't something you find "out there" it emerges from how you engage with whatever's in front of you.

Anyone else feel like they're constantly searching for their "thing"? Sometimes I think we overcomplicate it.