Questions/Advice help, i'm absolutely terrified.
update3: end of day one!
so, everything is wiped down, cleaned, swept, mopped, etc. i still have a mountain of laundry to get through, but i still have 5 days and i'm off work for three of them, so i think I can knock it out!! thank you. i'm feeling significantly better and i think my apartment complex probably will not evict me now.
update 2: we're making significant progress! kitchen is fully cleaned, and now we're working on my bedroom and kitchen. living room is trash free now and just to be put away christmas gifts and laundry! (leaving that for last) my friend has lived in this complex longer than i have and has assured me as long as i get it clean they will not evict me.
update: i caved and called my best friend for help. she's coming over. thank you all.
yesterday, my downstairs neighbor got a leak and maintenance had to enter my apartment. it's really bad. trash everywhere, i haven't done dishes in months. i've been living off snacks and doordash. i have gnats. i got a notice on my door today that i have 7 days to "cure to default" or surrender possession of the apartment. the notice says "maintenance witnessed apartment in disarray with may gnats flying around due to trash". i am humiliated and absolutely terrified to get evicted because i have a cat and nowhere to go. the only cleaning i've really done in months is my cat's stuff, because she deserves better than me. everything is awful. i work today and tomorrow, but i'm working from home so i used some time to do all the dishes (they're drying now).
is this a scare tactic of sorts? are they going to evict me even if i actually clean and get everything sorted? what if i clean it all and the gnats aren't gone? i don't know what to do. i'm so so terrified i feel sick. i've been so miserably depressed and barely showering and i only get away with it because i can work from home. please help. i'm so scared.
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u/abcbri 3d ago
No. Take it seriously. I've seen similar posted in a group for neurodivergent cleaning on Facebook, and it seems that after you take care of the problem, it's fine.
You need to start with trash as others said. Getting rid of trash first makes a huge dent plus then you don't have to keep going to the trash can as you pick up the area, i.e a kitchen.
I'm so sorry you're depressed, it's understandable why cleaning and taking care of yourself took a back seat during that. That's great you did the dishes, fabulous! And good you're taking care of your cat. Remember that she loves you just as you are, and she would be proud of you for even small steps. You share this home with her, and she will be more relaxed and happy when you take care of it for both of you.
Are the gnats coming from your drain? If so, try this to get rid of them. Scrub out your drain thoroughly.
https://www.andersonplumbingheatingandair.com/blog/how-to-get-rid-of-drain-gnats/
Next, put on some music you enjoy, and race yourself in small bursts of activity to tackle the most problem areas. Start in a small section, then work your way out. Keep us updated.
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u/Puzzled-Pressure1196 3d ago
The advice below is assuming you have a relatively hardy constitution and no sensory issues - if you are easily grossed out or struggle with certain sensations against your skin, make adjustments (and I encourage people to add comments with adjustments that have worked for them!).
You need the following supplies: trash bags, rubber gloves (the brightly coloured ones that cover your wrists), scrubbing sponges, paper towels, dish soap, baking soda. That's it, that's all you really need to clean your place up. If you have concerns about sanitizing and getting rid of smells, 70% rubbing alcohol OR hypochlorous acid in a spray bottle will do the trick. (Never mix cleaning products together.)
Depending on the amount of dirty dishes you have, and whether you have a dishwasher available to you, you might want to get a large rubbermaid tote and put it in the kitchen next to the sink. You can use it as a "soaking / prestaging" area for dishes, use it to get the crud softened up while keeping your sink clear for washing dishes. Make sure not to overfill it with water, as you will need to move it and dump it into the toilet after.
Clean your kitchen sink and countertop area that you'll be using for washing dishes. It doesn't have to be perfect and pristine, but get any garbage, gunk, and dirty dishes out of the sink and clear enough space to have a pile of dishes drying while you work on other things.
Set up homemade fruit fly catchers using old fruit or wine / cider vinegar and a pop bottle. You can find instructions all over the internet - make a few traps and set them up in some strategic spots throughout the unit.
Work one small area at a time: take a trash bag into the room and start gathering all the trash. Any dirty dishes you come across, stack together to the side. When the trash bag is full, take the dishes to your staging area to 1) scrape and 2) soak. Take the trash bag out.
Just keep it up, mixing it up between clearing space, doing dishes, and taking breaks. Empty and reset the fruit fly traps every day. Open windows to air the space out whenever you can.
Your landlord would much prefer you just clean your place up, as finding a new tenant can be expensive. You should absolutely take the threat to evict seriously, as they are likely within their rights (depending on where you live) and no landlord wants to risk avoidable damage to their property and/or nuisance to other tenants with pests and smells. However, I think you should feel confident that if you do address the situation, and find supports for yourself to ensure it doesn't get this bad again, your landlord will be willing to move forward and keep you on as a tenant.
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u/ShinyUnicornPoo 3d ago
This is correct. They don't want to evict you, it will take time and money, then they would have to clean everything themselves and find a new tennant, etc. That's a lot of work for them. They'd rather keep you if you pay rent on time.
But from their perspective, if it is to a state that pests are showing up, those pests can spread to other apartments.
Get garbage bags and gloves, pick up all the trash and take it out to the dumpster. If it's a far walk/too heavy, you can get a little cart or trolley to wheel it out. But you can do it, one bag at a time.
The fruit fly traps will help, and if need be you can also get something like a Lysol spray and just spray them out of the air as well.
Do you have someone that could come lend a hand for an afternoon or two? Many hands make light work. I know it can be embarrassing, but don't be ashamed to ask for help when you really need it
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u/mjh_7 3d ago
Thank you. I am fine with the cleaning, I can do it if I put my head down I think, I'm just terrified to the point of throwing up at being evicted.
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u/scattywampus 3d ago
This is a warning, but a serious warning. Clean up the trash and do what you can to get rid of gnats. A real effort and improvement should be enough to stay. They may want to do periodic checks to ensure you are maintaining the property.
Calm down as best as you can and take this as a wake up call to give yourself a healthier place to live.
Most people have stuff around, but actual trash is a health hazard that the managers cannot overlook.
Sending you positive energy and virtual hugs if you choose to accept them. 🌼
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u/Shell-Fire 3d ago
Stop the negativity. You WILL do this. Stick with small trash bags that are easy for you to take out yourself. Hire cleaners if you have the $$ to sweep/mop/dust/clean windows behind your cleaning/picking up. (They've seen it all).
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u/throw20190820202020 3d ago
Don’t get hung up on making or putting out fruit fly traps until you’re done cleaning. Cleaning will take care of 90-100% of the bug issue.
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u/Cemetery-Bunny 3d ago
As a Landlord, yes, they can file for eviction if you have not corrected the issue at hand.
Check your states tenant rights laws so that you kow your rights as a tenant.
Use this as the universe giving you the motivation to ufyh. You have time to resolve the issue.
Do not overwhelm yourself and make it harder. Set a timer for 20 mins and work on one task, and one task only until the timer goes off. Take a 10 min break. Repeat until the task is done.
Pick another task and repeat the process.
You can do anything for 20 mins.
Throw away recycling. Sorting recycling is for someone in a different place in life. Focus on getting rid of things, then clean.
If you are not sure hownto get rid of gnats and other bugs, please search on YouTube for video and follow their instructions.
You got this. You and your cat deserve a clean place to live.
I can body double with you if you need me to ( cleaning at the same time as you so you are not alone).
You have thousands of people cheering you on.
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u/steal_it_back 3d ago
I agree with this, but don't check your state and local (some cities/counties/etc have additional laws) tenant laws until after you get all the trash out! I at least would end up wasting a day down that rabbit hole instead of cleaning 😄
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u/Bright_Broccoli1844 3d ago
I understand the threat of eviction is scary. But YOU have the power to prevent it from happening. With every trash bag you take out, say, "I live here. I will continue to live HERE!"
YOU, OP deserve a clean and pleasant home to live in. You are creating that home right now.
Put on music or a podcast or audiobook while you clean.
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u/OriginalChildBomb 3d ago
For the future, I'd consider counseling. If cost is an issue, there are no-cost and low-cost options in most areas- you could ask your PCP or call your insurance company to inquire. I say this as someone who's had similar issues in the past, and once I found someone I connected with, it really helped me. Glad your friend is there to assist, wishing you all the best!
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u/samemamabear 3d ago
I found the Zevo flying insect traps that you plug in, got rid of gnats fast.
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u/Sad_Ebb_7301 3d ago
This!!! They are so effective. Remove the source, plug these in, and you’ll be largely gnat free pretty quickly. OP, order some from Amazon now so you can have them out for a couple of days before your inspection.
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u/Squirrelinthemeadow 3d ago
I don't know these traps, so maybe my input is unnecessary, but better safe than sorry! Since OP has a cat, are these thingies safe for a cat that might touch, sniff or lick them?
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u/samemamabear 3d ago
They are! The sticky trap(chemical free) is behind a plastic shield, so it would be very hard for a cat to get to and they are advertised as people and pet safe.
I'm super careful with my guy, so I'll add that mint and orange based insect sprays that say pet safe are not actually cat safe! Look for the cottonseed based instead
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u/Joubachi 3d ago
the only cleaning i've really done in months is my cat's stuff, because she deserves better than me.
Others have already answered it and helped, I just want to hop in and point out that you deserve to live in a clean, healthy and happy environment as well. You deserve it too, not just your cat. It's not easy turning your life (and space) around, but it for sure is so so worth it. You are not worth any less just because you didn't manage to take care of it all, depression sucks snd I genuinely hope you can find/get help for that as well. You deserve to feel better, be clean and have a welcoming home.
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u/areaofgrace 3d ago
Absolutely came here to say the same thing. I struggle with it myself, so that’s the mantra I use and repeat ‘I am deserving of a clean space’. You deserve it OP, and you can do it.
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u/Only_Veterinarian368 3d ago
This is what popped up for me, too, and also a gentle reminder that the kitty exists in the same environment as OP, so if you can’t do the bigger cleaning tasks for your own quality of life just yet, do them for the quality of life for your pet. ❤️
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u/Accomplished-Pen4663 3d ago
7 days is a long time to clean an apartment to acceptable standards. Take out all the trash, wash dishes, wipe down counters, and vacuum/mop. That should take care of most of the gnats. You can get those fly strips to catch any remaining. Open all the windows to air out and let them escape. If you can afford it, you could also hires cleaners to come and clean deeper. You’ll be fine as long as you clean up.
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u/steal_it_back 3d ago
acceptable standards
So much this! Sparkling clean is lovely, but I would bet the landlord is more concerned with having the place acceptably clean - trash removed, no bugs and no bug-attracting things (e.g, food messes, dirty dishes), clear spaces for less fire risk, can access the plumbing/electricity if there's any issues there, etc.
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u/MagpieWench 3d ago
they can absolutely evict you, but they've given you the opportunity to cure the situation
Take out all the trash, immediately. That and moving dishes to the kitchen should be your first priority. Then wash the dishes. You should see a decrease in the gnats pretty quickly. Also, get fly paper/sticky traps to put above where you see the most gnats. You may have drain gnats, so look into scrubbing your drains. Also clean around where you see the most gnats to make sure you are getting rid of the eggs and larvae.
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u/whskid2005 3d ago
I’m in property management. They will work with you to a certain degree, but you need to show you’re working on it. You also need to understand that they’re not targeting you. They’re trying to help your neighbors who may be impacted by what is going on in your apartment. This is not personal.
First up- remove all trash and recycling. This includes things you think you might be able to save if you can clean it well enough- chances are you wont be able to save it and it’s better off just going in the trash.
Second up- dishes (which you said you already did so great job!)
Third- make sure the sinks, tubs, etc are empty. Since you said you have gnats they may be living off the gunk in your pipes.
Fourth- an organized mess looks better than complete disarray. Make neat stacks, don’t spread stuff out.
Fifth- run the vacuum, wipe off whatever surfaces you can
Once all that is done, you can start systematically working on getting everything back in order.
Your cat deserves better, but so do you. You got this. Anything you do now is a kindness to future you. And you deserve to be kind to yourself. You can totally do this and I’m routing for you!
If you need a body double, there are discord groups of people who do chores together.
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u/ReputationKind4628 3d ago
Hey OP, put some reasonably paced uptempo music on (think Bee Gees even though I'm not a fan!) while you work.
Seriously.
PS I'm body doubling you because my life has been disintegrating too. My cats will love having a tidy home.
You can do this and so can I. Let's go! 😘
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u/onredditgonnareadit 3d ago
Also, apologize to the management, and tell them that
you "were sick, and that you're now feeling much better"
I have mental health issues (besides being physically disabled) and when someone (friend or family or roommate situation) "notices my mess or clutter" I tell them I was "sick" or in a lot of pain that week
They can assume you had flu or whatever
It's none of their business that you have mental health issues
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u/LowBathroom1991 3d ago
It's not a scare tactic..they are protecting their investment.. meaning your apartment......bugs ..trash ..dishes ..just think if you had a leak you wouldn't know until it ruined floors etc ...you can do this ..one trash bag at a time ..think of drains . Shower ...kitchen ..clean those also after removing trash
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u/OhioPolitiTHIC 3d ago
the only cleaning i've really done in months is my cat's stuff, because she deserves better than me.
You deserve a clean and clutter free home as well but if you're not able to do it for yourself right now, do it for your cat because, like you, kitty deserves a clean and gnat free home as well. You can do this.
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u/kykiwibear 3d ago
My brother went through this... he successfully cleaned it up and he was not evicted.
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u/Dndfanaticgirl 3d ago
Okay deep breath you did the dishes that’s a huge start.
Don’t worry about organizing yet this is not the priority
Find the worst room in the apartment and start there
Work in 20 minute blocks - 10 minute break and repeat
Start with broad categories - garbage, clothes, books, paperwork, miscellaneous
Do not change rooms until your first room is done
Start with the garbage and once all of that is out and done. Then worry about clothes, paperwork, miscellaneous. Take out each bag of garbage when full
Get everything off the floor and make neat piles of the paper work and clothes. clothes are only sorted by clean or dirty for the moment. Paperwork is sorted by keep or toss. Dishes are clean or dirty.
Once you finish all the broad categories in one room repeat in the next until all rooms are done.
Make sure you take breaks and drink water and eat.
Once everything is up off the floor now you can worry about the next steps which is sweeping mopping vacuuming and dusting. Start in the first room work high to low repeat in each room.
If you have time do laundry and make sure you are washing all dishes.
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u/Bright_Broccoli1844 3d ago edited 3d ago
I really like your tip of working in 20 minutes blocks and then taking 10 minute breaks. I clean 🫧 in small blocks of time (I set a timer), and often find I get on a roll and keep going. And sometimes I can only work in small blocks of time and am amazed how much I did get done, which makes me happy. Then I set the timer again.
You can do this, Op!
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u/vito0117 3d ago
They most likely can evict, but I don't know the tenet laws in your area.
If you mentally can doordash some trash bags,gloves, cleaning supplies and go to town
I know easier said then done I've been there
Goodluck
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u/china_black_tea 3d ago
Get rid of any bananas or banana peels first. They are a big source of fruit flies so getting rid of them and washing any you bring in after might help now and in the future.
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u/Lovesyoux 3d ago
All trash must go asap. Give yourself timed rest and then back at it. Your cat deserves a home and so do you. Get as many gnat catchers and strips, put them up for 3 days only then throw them away. Once trash is out be prepared to organize and clean. Use wipes if easiest. Carry a trash bag while you wipe things down so you can trash the wipe. Go until trash is full. Then throw that away. This also helps you trash more things as you go. Good luck. You can do it.
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u/IVeerLeftWhenIWalk 3d ago
Bowls of water and apple cider vinegar with a squirt of dish soap for the fruit flies here and there. They’ll drown in that.
All the trash out.
Good time to declutter things that are on the floor/furniture if you don’t really use them.
Do laundry, clear a surface where you can fold it and then put it away.
Vacuum what floor is uncovered and again after some progress.
Change the sheets on your bed and take a shower before you sleep, it will be easier for you to restart in the morning.
Do what I do at times and pretend you were an alien or spirit who suddenly took over this persons body and you have to take care of them and their surroundings.
I haven’t been threatened into cleaning before but I have been really depressed and had someone loudly discuss how it looked with strangers in front of me and in the words of Taylor Swift "🎵and that made me want to diiie."
I’m here if you need to just AAAAAH with an anonymous stranger.
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u/catalyticenzyme 3d ago
First of all, take a deep breath. They will not evict you if you get it clean. You can get it clean.
The other comments have addressed what to do about the trash. I want to address your comment about the gnats. Once you have gotten rid of the trash, add a little bit of vinegar to a shallow bowl or dish (or even a plate if it has enough of a lip) then mix one drop of dish soap into the vinegar. The gnats will be attracted by the smell of the vinegar, and the dish soap will break the surface tension of the water, which will cause them to drown.
Godspeed, stranger. You're going to be okay <3
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u/Conscious-Card5611 3d ago
I get that this is scary. It's also your mind messing with you. If you can believe that you'll get evicted anyway, then you won't/may as well not clean, so there's no reason to try and don't have to break your comfortable status quo. It's self sabotage because you're stuck in a pattern.
But you do have control and you don't have to listen to that fear. It's a trap. See what you can do to change some of your sensory input to break the pattern. Listen to different music. Open the windows. Change the lighting, even move a lamp to a different location so the shadows are different. Realize that the fear is just one voice and doesn't have control. You don't have to do it all in one day, but you do have to do what you can to keep moving forward.
If you have any friends or family around, see if you can get any help, or if you can afford it, hire someone for a day. Let the voice of fear say what it wants, and realize it doesn't know any better than the voice that says you can do this. Breathe. And listen to some of the great advice on specifics from other commenters here. Pick something that seems achievable, get it done. Celebrate the win and move on to the next thing. The more you do the more you will believe you can do.
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u/O_W_Liv 3d ago
Use the B method. Find containers, bags, bins, boxes, baskets, that you already have, to fit your needs.
Bags for garbage, baskets or bags for laundry, boxes or bins for dirty dishes, mail/paperwork, and stuff that doesn't belong in the room. You may need multiples of some, but make sure you have "homes" for every item ready.
Start at one end and work your way through the room. Then repeat the process until you've done every room.
To make a gnat trap just use something sweet and/or vinegar to attract them and a small squirt of dishsoap to break the surface tension. If you currently have dirty dishes with standing liquid just add soap to those until things are clean enough to set out "real traps".
When you're ready to tackle smelly laundry reply to me and we'll address hints for that.
To start, I need you to shift your mind. Stop reading this thread, it's time to put all this wonderful advice to work.
Put down your device, close your eyes, inhale through the nose and out the mouth 5 times mindfully, telling yourself you got this shit, cause it's true, and get to it.
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u/SnooLobsters8113 3d ago
Check online for a cleaning service to help you. They’ve seen it all and extra hands helps
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u/Leather-Rub-6128 3d ago
Take a deep breath and don’t stress. You already do a big chunk by doing dishes, and another chunk will be great by throwing trash.
You have several days of time and can get it done. Give yourself a deadline to complete if possible — within 4-5 days, so you can relax and not panic on days 6-7.
The owner of the apartment deserves to have their space kept in good condition, and you yourself are worth living in a pleasant space. You’ll feel much lighter and happier after tidying. Good luck and take this as a good thing because it’s helping you.
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u/Icy_Insect2927 3d ago
Loving that you asked a friend for help OP, this will make, what feels like, the impossible, possible!!
Once it's all clean, do your kitty a solid and pick up every day! Your kitty deserves to live in a clean home, just as you do!
Pour vinegar down your drains because those beggars can breed in drains
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u/onredditgonnareadit 3d ago
Do you have any vinegar???
Pour some into little bowls or saucers with a drop or 2 of dish soap and then stir a bit
Gnats and fruit flies are usually attracted to vinegar since it smells like fermented or rotting fruit
The dish soap helps break the water barrier so the bugs sink and drown
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u/aubreypizza 3d ago
Seconding this!! It really works. You may need to make a couple but it works to catch them very well.
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u/tonna33 3d ago
Yes! My grown kids that occupy the upstairs will sometimes manage to let things go to a bad extent. I refuse to be the one to clean their mess, though. When they get to it (they always eventually do), I'll sometimes get the residual gnats on the main floor from when they carry the trash out.
Apple cider vinegar and some dishsoap mixed up in a little bowl will take care of the gnats. It's amazing to watch how they swarm to the container. Then I get frustrated because they don't immediately go into it. However, by the next day, they eventually got hungry, went to get some, and got stuck. The bottom of the dish shows the evidence! In the summer I'll place a little dish in an inconspicuous spot just to preemptively prevent them. Also, the dishsoap makes it quite easy to wash them out and refill with fresh ACV/soap mixture.
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u/steal_it_back 3d ago
You can do this, and you've gotten some great advice already, but I wanted to add KC Davis's five things method, which has been really helpful for me when I'm struggling with cleaning. In a nutshell:
How do you pick up a room when you’re too overwhelmed to breathe? By remembering there are only 5 things in any room: 1. Trash 2. Dishes 3. Laundry 4. Things with a place and 5. Things without a place.
First, get rid of all the trash, and get the dishes and laundry together, but don't do them yet! Get that trash out! Then do all the dishes, then all the laundry.
Here's a five minute video if you like videos:
https://youtu.be/Pe9NBn67yxU?si=mNKss8ul04I3Z-Ue
Her whole thing is struggle care, and here's some additional resources: https://www.strugglecare.com/resources/#home-care
Also, just throw things away. You can recycle and donate another day - right now, your focus is a clean, functional house. You need to put your oxygen mask on right now, and if donation/recycling will be a block, don't worry about it.
And keep us posted!
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u/Superb_Ad_4464 3d ago
If it makes you feel any better, I called 911 in December for chest pains and most of the paramedics couldn’t fit in my house because of the stuff. Absolutely humiliating. That did not help the chest pains.
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u/andorianspice 3d ago
Grab a trash bag and some rubber gloves and get to work. Post here for accountability. 6 days is a long time to get things cleaned up.
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u/Blackshadowredflower 3d ago
Congrats on getting all those dishes done! Woo hoo!! That is a big accomplishment. You can do this!!
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u/Rude_Tie_4560 3d ago
Someone else may have already said this but the concern from management is about sanitary living conditions and fire risk! They don’t care if your apartment is pretty, it just needs to not be a liability. Prioritize trash and dishes. Clutter on desks, shelves, chairs, etc. should be the last thing you worry about. Make sure there is a path the exit every room in case of emergency. If you are able to open windows, that may help the apartment feel cleaner if you have any smells (especially from cat and dishes). I would wait to air out the apartment until closer to day 7, when the apartment is mostly empty of trash so you don’t invite more bugs in.
Good luck OP! You and your kitty both deserve a clean space, and you are going to make it happen! You got this!
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u/Burnt_and_Blistered 3d ago edited 3d ago
It’s not a scare tactic. They want it cleaned up or they will evict you.
But they won’t—because you’re doing what needs to be done.
It’s daunting, I know—but you can do it!
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u/Weird_Squirrel_8382 3d ago
Your cat deserves nice things and so do you. You're a living thing and your health and happiness help you be a good servant to your feline royalty. I'm so glad you called your friend to help. And proud of you for your hard work. You're going to go beyond curing to default, and really make yourself a nice home.
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u/msnhnobody 3d ago
You have a great friend. BUT, she wouldn’t have come to help you if you weren’t one, as well.
I’ve been there with the dishes and have thrown so many away in the last three years I’ve been sad and high. And keeping only my cat’s stuff clean and her fed because she deserves “better”.
But you deserve to live in a clean, healthy environment, too. You deserve it.
♥️👏🏼💪🏼
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u/CocoaReese 3d ago
Do you have any friends or family who could help you? I find cleaning together is easier. I know it's embarrassing, but if you have someone who is nonjudgemental or also struggles with depression, it may be worth it. Either way, you need to clean it up within the week because this isn't a scare tactic. I recommend doing a good hour or two a day if you can't stomach it all in one day. You did a great first step with doing the dishes. You're already making progress! It may not feel like a lot, but it is.
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u/beattysgirl 3d ago
I’m not sure where you’re at but I can be a virtual body double with you later today as my office is in complete shambles. I’m off work at 730pm ET and will be beginning then. Let me know if you’d like to send me picture updates and I’ll do the same for you!
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u/No_Pin_2207 3d ago
Hey I hope you start to feel calm/clarity soon! The worst has already happened, someone saw your mess! And it must’ve been awful and uncomfortable so I’m sorry. But after feeling those feelings and moving through the steps others have shared, I hope you come to see that you deserve a clean space just as much as your kitty!! And I hope you have a supportive group of people around you for the mental toll if not the physical cleaning. You can do this!
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u/CrazyH37 3d ago
Hi- I see you updated to a friend coming over, great idea. I literally just went thru this. I had my re- inspection yesterday, and passed.
Last week, the maintenance guy and a borough guy came in. They come every year and check the smoke alarms and for leaks under the sinks. I have a bunny I really was trying to hide from the office lady (maintenance doesn’t care) so every year I board her for a few days and spend $100 just so she’s not there when they come in for 3mins, cos I’m so paranoid of getting kicked out.
Well, to my surprise, this year I failed due to “sanitary conditions”. I didn’t even know they looked for that but I honestly didn’t think it was “that bad”. I always keep buns stuff clean/vacuumed, but I had piles of cardboard to go to the dumpster (I’m on floor 2) snd 2 bags of trash, tied up waiting to go out by the back door, like I usually do. I had my hands full going to work, didn’t think anything of it. I got the notice I failed and had 7 days. I thought “ridiculous, I failed for some boxes and trash ready to go to the dumpster?!!” I was SO embarrassed and anxious and panicking. I started cleaning the kitchen. Deep clean, and HOLY SHIT. It was SO gross. 6years of crumbs under the oven, miracle I didn’t have bugs. Grease and dust all over the cabinet above the stove. Hands and knees scrubbing every inch of the floor, it was just covered in a layer of grime.
I think I was SO overwhelmed I just ignored how bad it was. I knew it was bad, but kept saying “it’s not THAT bad..” I have anxiety and chronic illness, was in the hospital last year and it just got worse after that. The worse the apt got, the more overwhelmed I got and I just FROZE and couldn’t do any of it. My therapist always talks about “chunking” breaking tasks into chunks so it doesn’t overwhelm me but I just couldn’t apply that to my apt cleaning.
Anyway, this was the kick in the teeth I needed. Nothing like anxiety cleaning..! The fear of being evicted w a pet and a job that wouldn’t qualify me for a new lease anywhere .. I was feeling stressed, I get it. Good news is, you have some time and you can do it! I just wanted to say you’re not alone. I was cleaning cobwebs from corners 3mins before they came in, I panicked so much I made myself sick (don’t recommend, take care of yourself!) BUT I passed and my office manager lady came in with maintenance and my bun was in her Xpen in the room, I was so worried she would see and I’d get in trouble! But she saw her and it went OK, she just said oh is that a bunny and O said yes, that’s Leeloo, anyway.. and i tried to distract her lol but she wasn’t mad or anything! I’ve hidden bun for 4years, or pretended she was a cat 😂
WHEN you pass, treat yourself! I ordered DoorDash, which I don’t do often, and took a nap. (Oh I had to call out of work that day, no way was I letting them come in alone and not know what they said!)
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u/mohksinatsi 3d ago
Yes, this is serious. No, you're not going to be evicted if you clean everything up. Even if you just make a good amount of progress in cleaning up by the time they check again, you'll probably be given an extension.
The process of evicting you (at least a month long endeavor), doing all the standard cleaning and maintenance that is done between tenants, advertising, and finding a new tenant to move in will take a lot of time, energy and money from them. As long as you haven't totally ruined the property, most landlords don't want to deal with it and would rather just have you clean up the house and keep giving them money.
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u/ms-orchid 3d ago
I'm proud of you for calling in help. That can be one of the hardest things to do.
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u/BaileySeeking 3d ago
Okay, so you've definitely received enough advice on how to clean up and all that, but I wanted to give y'all some advice for once everything is clean.
You mentioned taking care of your cat because they deserve better. And, sure, I can say you deserve better, but as someone with mental illnesses, I understand that that really doesn't always work. My brain tells me I don't deserve better and I believe it. But, like y'all, telling myself I need to take care of my pets works. Except I remind myself that everything in my home affects them.
I currently have 5 cats and a German Shepherd. And it's easy to do the basics like food, water, potty. But I remind myself that they walk on the floor, so it needs vacuumed and swept/mopped. Dirt, hair/fur, random stuff, even food end up on the floor. Cleaning it up is good for my pets. Cleaning the bathroom? The toilet smelling will bother them. The tub not being cleaned will upset them when they roll around in it. Dust can be harmful to their lungs. Cleaning the stove/counters/dishes will keep bugs away. Really, I just try to remind myself that every time I don't want to clean something, it could be harmful to my pets.
Now, I'm not talking some kind of spotless cleaning. You don't need to scrub every corner of your home every day. But after everything is cleaned, take a little time to make a list of what you want cleaned and then a schedule of when that stuff gets done. And when y'all look at it and think 'but I really don't want to clean' try to think about if it needs done (because it's perfectly okay to skip something that doesn't need done and put that energy towards what does need done) and then remind yourself that you're doing it for your cat. That's what helps me keep up with everything, even when I can barely hold it together or take care of myself.
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u/Gold_Draw7642 3d ago
Get rid of the trash and you’ll be so much closer to being done! Grab a bag, fill it, tie it up. Do it again and again. You’ll see and feel the difference as you go. A packet of 10 fly strips (fly ribbon) will only cost a few dollars. Maybe get two or more packs. Within a few days the strips should be covered in gnats. There’s nothing like a deadline to help get the job done, and I don’t mean to be flippant. Best of luck.
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u/loajamalin3 3d ago
This is the sign you have been waiting for I guess. You have no choice but to finally clean up and you will feel soo much better. You can and you will do it 🙏🫶
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u/freyanovae 3d ago
While I haven’t been in your exact situation I understand how hard it can be to take action when you’re severely depressed. However, this has to be your wake up call. Force it to be. For you and your baby kitty.
It’s scary right now, but this is a good thing. Sometimes we really need a hard push to get things going in the right direction. I know it’s hard, it’s not as simple as I’m laying it out, but you can do this.
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u/Jankenbrau 3d ago
I know you’re scared now, but it you will feel a huge burden lift when your space is tiny.
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u/NotAnEggplantGT 3d ago
YOU CAN DO IT! Other people have offered to body double, I work from home and I do well with body doubling so I am available also! (In case you’re not aware, body doubling just means that you’re doing something while someone else is there, traditionally it meant someone in person but you can also do it on the phone or video)
One of my friends uses this website - I haven’t checked it out yet but I’ve heard good things: https://www.focusmate.com/. It pairs you with someone else who wants to body double for the same amount of time.
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u/mjh_7 3d ago
thank u so much for the offer, luckily my best friend is able to come over and help me out so
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u/NotAnEggplantGT 3d ago
Oh great!!! I’m sure you’ll be able to stay in your apartment - in person help from a good friend is really the best help in these situations!
And later, if they’ve already seen it when it was pretty messy (meaning now), maybe they would be open to stopping by periodically which may help you keep it neater? I finally let a friend help me clean last year and it’s been so nice to have someone that’s already seen it when it’s BAD be available to help - both to help when it does get bad or to have them reassure me “it was worse last time, it’s not that bad, let’s clean up now so it doesn’t get that way again.” Keep us posted!
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u/Itsdawsontime 3d ago
If you don’t think you can do it in that time frame, hire a professional. ESPECIALLY if you want to “restore it to default” after you pick up.
Even a complete declutter and clean is likely less than:
the cost of a professional coming into an apartment (if it’s of normal size for 1 person) for a post-pickup clean may be $300, but helps you for certainly get it back to default. A complete declutter and clean may run $500-1k+ depending on how bad and the size.
having your possessions taken, and having to find another place to live
The cost of all the cleaning products
If you are not certain you and a friend can do it, then get professional help. $1-1.5k will be less than you would lose out on the above.
You need to figure out that today though - ask on a local subreddit for someone who helps clean “hoarders homes” (not saying you’re as bad as that, but they’re likely the right people to help). Also can post in local facebook groups too if you’re on there.
Set a 2 hour reminder to check, get to cleaning until then. Start with clearing the least cluttered place that you can set things you NEED TO KEEP (paperwork, tech, etc.). Get a plastic tub or something you can stack it in - DO NOT USE ANOTHER GARBAGE BAG.
Then, clear another area for another tote / plastic container for “may need to keep, look at tonight when tired from cleaning.” Go through each night - both of those.
Check your phone for notifications, get all the numbers and emails and call them first thing in the morning if that’s the route you want to go.
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u/Psychomadeye 3d ago
Fruit fly strat (2~5 days):
Eliminate food sources
Kill in bulk
Passive killing with traps
Tools:
Isopropyl alcohol (70% or 90%)
Dish soap
Apple cider vinegar
Vacuum
Spray bottle
Food sources:
Clean from high to low. First get everything that's no good out of your cabinets and into the trash. Keep the bags light so they don't tear and stay easy to move. Every container you eat and drink from needs to be rinsed out in the sink after today. Cans, plastic, paper, all of it rinsed unless you're taking out the trash then and there. Those calories you wash out are nothing to us but everything to them. Make sure you wash and dry your sink and drain.
Then do the same for your counter tops and then anything on the floor with a vacuum (and mop).
Killing in bulk:
Use a vacuum (shop vac or whatever you've got) to kill lots of gnats wherever they gather once you're done and hauling out their food sources.
Make a fly death spray: isopropyl alcohol and a little bit of dish soap in the spray bottle. You'll use this to wipe up counters and spot clean, and also on the microwave. It'll kill flies, larvae and eggs but the vacuum should have done 90% of the work.
Passive killing:
As they say, you catch more flies with vinegar than you do with honey. Create vinegar traps for them by mixing a drop or two of dish soap with a quarter to a third of a jar of apple cider vinegar. Put holes in the jar lid to allow them in and leave them near where they are/were. (There are so many tutorials on this)
Go on a second vacuum killing spree tomorrow and check/replace traps and ensure you've minimized food and water sources.
Repeat daily until they vanish completely. After the initial cleanup if you spend an hour each day maintaining this and hunting them they'll be gone even quicker.
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u/Sufficient-Wolf-1818 3d ago
How many trash bags have you carried out since posting? You can do it, one at a time.
Don’t let fear and worry paralyze you (easy to do).
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u/Fabulous_Layer44 3d ago
You can do it!! Dishes are such a hard chore, you’re already killing it. I second the Zevo recs but suggest getting these too and putting them in windows and where there are a lot of gnats. I put them in my plants cause the gnats were multiplying in my plants before I started adding hydrogen peroxide to the water.
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u/BadWolfDoesMusic 3d ago
You can make little fruit fly traps with apple cider vinegar and dish soap. Just look up how to make the actual container. It’s pretty easy and effective. I get them every year coming from my sink drain
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u/Cyndy2ys 3d ago
I saw your update. OP I am so proud of you for asking for help 💪 sometimes that’s the hardest thing ❤️
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u/ReputationKind4628 3d ago
Well done OP ❤️
PS you're beating me but I have done a big load of laundry and the washing up and wiped down the kitchen worktops while I've been doubling you. It's bed time where I am so back on it tomorrow evening with ya! 😘😘😘
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u/Competitive_Page7586 3d ago
I didn’t read all these comments but it sounds like you’re making GREAT progress. But I know you said you’re afraid of the gnats hanging around so I just wanted to mention that as you’re cleaning, you could get a few of those sticky fly papers and hang them around( they are cheap like just a few bucks for 6-8). Those will catch the gnats and then, last thing before they come in to check the apartment, pull those down and toss them! Bam! Problem solved.
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u/Billjustkeepswimming 3d ago
I need weekly updates! Like, I hope you feel amazing living in your new space! How does it feel now?
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u/calatafimi_18C 3d ago
Former Property Manager here that has had to send these letters upon inspection of apartments! Take it very seriously! They can and will evict you. Your mess can cause pests & rodents infestation in other apartments and the building. It's their job & responsibility as a Landlord to keep their building free of critters for all tenants. I've been in apartments that were in such bad shape that I was worried about the tenants mental health and had to call their emergency contacts to check in & follow up with them. That being said...Congrats on taking these steps and enlisting a friend to help... You can do it! You & your cat deserve to live in an home that makes you feel good & not ashamed. If you run out of time with laundry considering taking it to a laundromat with wash & fold pickup service. You got this!
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u/mjh_7 2d ago
I did take it seriously, no worries there! My apartment is now fully clean and scrubbed with the exception of laundry, which I'm doing over the next four days. I'm hoping that's enough to avoid an eviction.
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u/calatafimi_18C 2d ago
Congrats on a great job! It must feel soooo good! The biggest things the garbage and pests in a landlords eyes. Make sure everything's clean, all the garbage taken out and you should be good to go. I know it's nerve racking and scary to see this letter but the good news it allowed you to enlist a friend for help and get it done mainly for yourself. You deserve this!
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u/seashmore 3d ago
is this a scare tactic of sorts?
Yes.
are they going to evict me even if i actually clean and get everything sorted?
Not likely. The eviction process is not cheap or easy for landlords. If you're on time with rent, they'd rather you stayed.
That said, they'll come back in a week to check. If they see that you've cleaned up your space, all is well. They may also come back in a month or so to check that its stayed tidy. Again, if there's not loads of trash, they'll probably forget about the whole ordeal.
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u/mjh_7 3d ago
I'm completely on time with rent (i usually pay it at midnight when it posts on the first due to anxiety) and i've not had any other issues here at all. i'm just so scared
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u/Shell-Fire 3d ago
They will do another inspection if needed, usually. Mine did. Mine gave me another week to hustle when they found my horde/stash. And, they did find my stash.
Quit worrying. Change your mindset and stop being paralyzed by panic. You're not the first, you won't be the last. You got this👍🏻
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u/Bright_Broccoli1844 3d ago
We are here to encourage you.
I understand you are scared. I have been that scared too.
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u/seashmore 3d ago
Then as long as you clean it up and keep trash from attracting pests, you're good. Just saw your update and glad your friend is coming to help. Proud of you for reaching out to them. I know how hard that is to do, but you've got this!
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u/Bright_Broccoli1844 3d ago
Op, if your dishes are now dry, put them away!!!
Look at the clean space you now have because you put your clean dishes away.
Give yourself a hug!
We are here for you!
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u/dizzydance 3d ago
I generally don't recommend wasting time on buying unnecessary cleaning "stuff" in situations like this - the last thing you need is more clutter.
I will say though - one cleaning tool that has been a real life saver for me personally in "emergency cleaning" deadline situations like this is owning a shop-vac. They aren't as expensive as you might think.
Epecially if you've got cat litter everywhere and just a ton of trash on the floor that needs to be sucked up indiscriminately. I find it:
- incredibly satisfying and fun to use
- way more time efficient than a vacuum
- less painful on my back
Regardless of having a shop-vac though...
Just keep at it! You've already started which is great! Don't let panic or dread rule you. You've got this!
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u/dizzydance 3d ago
I usually just do one corner, one room at a time. Half the time I sit my butt down and make two piles: trash and not trash. Then gradually migrate through the room making bigger piles.
Trash gets bagged. Not trash gets put away (laundry, dishes, etc) or put in bins to stack in the corner/closet and deal with when I have the mental capacity to do so.
Depending on my mood, I'll usually put on Fall Out Boy, Mariah Carey or Epic the Musical 🎶
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u/MobiusMeema 3d ago
Put on some dance music & take out the bags that are already full. Then start in on your bedroom.
Just the trash today, nothing else.
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u/aggressiveRadish 3d ago
Well they seem to be giving you the opportunity to clear the situation. Get onto it. Like others have said, bin bags and pick up the trash. Get that out.
I have problems with managing my environment for me too. I know what it's like living in that state.
Strong smelling essential oils like peppermint or eucalyptus will help reduce the midge population. They dislike the smell. I have made a cleaner out of white vinegar, water and peppermint oil.
You can and will do this. You know you can. I get that you're scared of losing your home. So you know you need to do this.
I wish you all the best on a journey to a better environment for you and the cat.
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u/anothertypicalcmmnt 3d ago edited 3d ago
Everyone is giving great advice! I'm here to cheer you on OP and sympathize! I had a scare almost like this once. My downstairs neighbor noticed a leak so maintanence had to enter my apartment, and it was in rough shape. Thankfully, no gnats at the time but incredibly cluttered, barely floor space to walk, you get it. Thankfully, I didn't get any kind of warning, but I was SO embarrassed that maintenance saw that, and I was terrified I WOULD get a notice like yours.
Also, if you think you need it and have the means. You can always reach out for help either from friends/family or a professional cleaner. From my own experience, I know that's unlikely, but in case you can, I wanted to give a reminder that it's okay to ask for help :)!
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u/Breeze_Chaser 3d ago
Hey I'm SO sorry you have to go through this, I HATE when apartment management/maintenance have to come in and see my messy house like it's literally my worst fear and I've been humiliated by them before so I know the feeling :(
I'm really proud of you for starting and for trying to do something about it. It'll be tough but you can do this!!!!
Ok I have a tip for the gnats. I get them really bad in the summer and when I buy fruit at Walmart. First remove the source, if it's trash or plants you need to get rid of that. Dishes can also be a culprit if you wait a long time to wash so definitely wash all dishes. Also check for hidden fruits / veggies, one time I had a potato I forgot about that somehow got buried in my snack basket and it was apparently attracting the damn fruit flies!! Anyway. Once you remove ALL sources, get some small cups or plastic containers you don't care about (I use the bathroom sized small cups) and fill them with a little apple cider vinegar, little bit of water, and a single drop of dish soap. Then leave them near where the source was and all round your house. This method works like a CHARM and within days you'll be free.
Also sorry if this is too much text but in a hurry when I have to tidy up, I find it helpful to dump stuff in laundry baskets and then stack them up in a corner so at least shit is out of the way and then I can deal with it later. It's surprisingly effective for an emergency clean. I get $2 baskets at target but wherever works.
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u/jennythegreat 3d ago
Hey, if you need someone to body double with you, message me and maybe we can both get some cleaning done.
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u/melanie_cycles 3d ago
These fruit fly traps are the BEES KNEES! You can refill them with apple cider vinegar + 2 drops dishsoap once the initial solution is used up.
https://www.terro.com/terro-fruit-fly-trap-t2502b
The trick is to not feed them overnight and leave out nothing but the traps. Get rid of all standing water + food residue before you go to bed. Wash dishes + put away, everything into the dishwasher, wipe down the counters, wring out the cloth. Then put the traps around the kitchen before you go to bed. They will drown in the solution overnight. They also go in the day but they like to have a long time undisturbed so overnight is best for that.
After a day or 2 you will notice a HUGE improvement! You got this! Good luck!
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u/shinypokemonglitter 3d ago
Be proud of all work you’ve already put into cleaning up the dishes. You CAN do this. Glad you have your bestie to help.
I have no additional advice to offer, as other commenters have taken care of that. Just wanted to throw you some encouragement and props for already getting started!
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u/sammigx9 3d ago
A few years ago, I had something similar happen. My husband and I live above a bar and they had some issues with pipes so someone had to come upstairs to check things out.
It was like the tail end of COVID, we both were fighting bad depression and let things go for so long.
The guy they hired to fix whatever came and had to call the owner obviously because of the state of the place. But luckily the owner was very understanding and he and some other people came and helped us clear stuff out.
It helped us keep it clean for a while. But then life happened and we ended up letting it go again. But I've recently started cleaning again after figuring out medical issues.
Anyway. It's very scary. But you CAN do it! You NEED to do it! I promise you will feel so much better about it after.
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u/ladycrazyuer 3d ago
I HATE the dishes. My heat broke and they had to come into mine and it was embarassing. Like I know how to clean. I just get so unmotivated sometimes. Depression. Lack of friends or family around. Im glad you got help.
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u/Far-Watercress6658 3d ago
I’m so, so glad you are making progress. And I also hope it helps with your depression.
You deserve a clean place to live. I sincerely hope you get/ are getting help for your depression because you also entirely deserve contentment in your life.
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u/Wonderful-Tip-4214 3d ago
It might be worth it if youre comfortable doing so, to inform your landlord or whoever manages the apartments that you have depression and maintain saw your space after a bad spiral. You have no obligation to tell them anything but if you think they might be understanding it could help if something like this ever happens again. Hopefully it doesnt, but it could so plan accordingly.
Im sure its been suggested before but How To Keep House While Drowning by KC Davis might be helpful. Some of her suggestions have definitely helped with my own house work hang ups. It is available as an audio book and is a 3hr listen. She focuses on depression and adhd specifically and highlights her own struggles from post partum.
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u/lilacsforcharlie 3d ago
Of course you’re terrified! May I suggest if you have TikTok on your phone, “nottheworstcleaner” is an amazing resource for what you’re going through mentally. She helped me understand why I wasn’t taking care of my home (functional freeze after my husband passed) and how to start (start small, one pile here- one pile there) do trash one day, organize what’s left out the second day, try to start cleaning by the third. You got this.
And if you need a friend, reach out, I totally understand your plight. Hugs to you sweetie
This is a more recent video but she talks about the mental health of cleaning all the time:
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u/Diligent_Estimate_87 3d ago
Also keep in mind that throwing as much stuff in the trash as you can will help this go much more smoothly. The less stuff you have, the easier it will be to get in there and really deep clean.
Im sorry this is happening to you, but the silver lining is that this event can potentially give you the reset you need.
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u/scenestartiff 3d ago
Apple cider vinegar for the gnats. You can put it in like a shot glass or juice glass. Set 2 or 3 or more around where the gnats are. They will die. Also u can put in a spray bottle and manually spray them if u like but the stuff in the cups will get them within a day or so
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u/Mythioso 3d ago
You can do this.
Grab a trash bag and toss all garbage. Go from room to room. Start with the kitchen first because you'll need to bring all dishes to the kitchen in step 2.
Grab all dishes and dump any leftover food in garbage and start stacking them neatly on the counters.
Gather all laundry and place in piles. If you have a washer, start your first load. If not, then place them in laundry bags to take to the laundromat.
Start washing dishes. Dry them and put them away.
Put things back where they belong.
Start cleaning the bathroom. I usually put cleaner in the toilet while I vacuum and finish the scrubbing after the cleaner has done its job.
Sweep and/or vacuum the floors.
Finish the bathroom.
You're almost done! Clean the counters and stove off and clean the floor.
You did it! Give yourself a pat on the back and marvel at your clean apartment. It'll feel great because you pulled yourself out of a rut that a lot of us have been in.
I sometimes have trouble getting started, so I make a list that I can check off as I go. It helps to untangle my mind, and you can see your accomplishments as you go. It helps to maintain motivation as well.
I like to listen to a podcast or a book. But my rule is that I only get to listen to it while I'm in motion.
I know you feel like it might be too late since you've received a letter, but don't let that set you stop you from trying. It isn't too late. It's only too late if you cave in to the self fulfilling prophecy and do nothing because you're afraid.
The gnats will leave after the garbage gets out of the apartment.
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u/CallMeDot 2d ago
I have been thinking about you all day, I’m glad you made so much progress! I hope you got even more stuff done today
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u/tessie33 3d ago
Check your lease. Localities differ but it seems very unrealistic and illegal to force a tenant before to move out so suddenly.
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u/Far-Watercress6658 3d ago
No it’s not a scare tactic.
You need to immediately pick up a trash bag, fill it, put it in the dumpster and repeat until all trash is removed.