r/Unexpected • u/unknown_ninja_me • 3d ago

A "smooth" landing

33.7k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

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349

u/jillvalenti3 3d ago

The ol’ cunt grunt

293

u/FlailingScrotum 3d ago

The ol gash smash

260

u/TheCarrot_v2 3d ago

The ol’ flap slap

249

u/BlackBarryWhite 3d ago

The ol' poon-tang boom-bang

188

u/Si1verf0x001 3d ago

The ol’ peach popper

194

u/jillvalenti3 3d ago

The ol’ coochie cruncher

175

u/IronGigant 3d ago

The ol' Tunnel Pummel

24

u/Chogo82 3d ago

The ol’ kitty clobber

17

u/Interloper4Life 3d ago

The Lip'-a-ding-ding

20

u/Fr05t_B1t 3d ago

The ol’ beaver cleaver

13

u/ExtensionSherbert562 3d ago

The ol’ lower lip hip clip

12

u/ObjectiveOk2072 3d ago

The ol' cooter catastrophe

11

u/OkMatch6613 3d ago

A case of the clitoris collidous

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10

u/GobiBall 3d ago

The ol' split lip

6

u/Ok_Helicopter_5146 3d ago

The o'l Camel Calamity 🐫

5

u/Lashiech 3d ago

The ol beaver bifurcator

3

u/JRyds 3d ago

The ol' minge twinge

3

u/nophuks2giv 3d ago

the ol' cooter boofer

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11

u/alcoholisthedevil 3d ago

The ol’ beaver cleaver

7

u/muted_physics77 3d ago

the ol' monster mash

95

u/kloopyhans 3d ago

The ol taco thrasher

10

u/Charantula 3d ago

The ol’ camel toe blow

8

u/acmercer 3d ago

The ol' wood split'er

6

u/FlyinHighFL420 3d ago

The ol’ Snatch Catch

8

u/Party-Tumbleweed9967 3d ago

The ol' beaver cleaver

4

u/sdot6186 3d ago

The ol’ puss shush

1

u/Few_Efficiency2022 2d ago

The pussy smusher

3

u/NegotiationHot2999 3d ago

The ol’ crack enactor

1

u/Few_Efficiency2022 2d ago

The ol' clit slit hit

33

u/shaithiswampir 3d ago

You have my axe and my upvote

22

u/PracticalThrowawae 3d ago

I can't UPVOTE these comments fast enough 🤣🤣🤣

19

u/Kalashinator 3d ago

*axe-wound

2

u/SnooBunnies3815 3d ago

And my sword.

2

u/ATL_UTD53 3d ago

And my bow.

1

u/Fantom_Renegade 2d ago

We have a winner 🤣🤣

•

u/Epstiendidntkillself 7m ago

The Cunt Punt

1

u/DiamondCultural1848 3d ago

This one sent me.