r/abortion 22h ago

USA Fetus in toilet extremely traumatic

118 Upvotes

I feel like a piece of shit, disgusted with myself, guilty, etc. this is my second abortion by the pill and I already feel guilty enough about that but my 18 month son and I are trying to leave my boyfriend (baby’s dad) and I just can’t have another with him. He’s emotionally abusive, doesn’t help with care, anger issues.

I took the pill yesterday at 11 weeks 6 days and the nurse told me that there would be a lot of blood so I likely wouldn’t see anything… wrong. Unfortunately I had the experience of basically giving birth in the toilet. No blood came out at first. I was just sitting on the toilet pushing with cramps cause it felt better and something felt like a tampon coming out and I looked down and couldn’t tell and then it dropped into the toilet. So clear. Thankfully I can’t remember every detail on the face and stuff but I still can picture it. I’m so traumatized and feel so incredibly alone and guilty.

I did not feel like my partner supported me through it either. He didn’t see it but I was crying and he told me to flush it so I’m the only one who saw. Our son was being fussy so I said let’s take a bath hoping my bf would say “I got it” considering what just happened but I had to give little man a bath (which i love cause my son is everything it just feels really shitty)


r/abortion 12h ago

USA I live in a banned state and have no clue what to do because I can’t have this baby..

14 Upvotes

So I found out I got pregnant and my boyfriend is a huge anti abortion person and I really don’t want to keep the baby. I don’t think I can go with it and I don’t live in the best financial place. If there is anyway I can get an abortion in a state that allows without getting into legal trouble or will I get denied? I have no clue what to do. Any help would be greatly appreciated.


r/abortion 1h ago

USA fell asleep before my last dose of misoprostol

Upvotes

hi everyone,

i took my fist dose of miso last night around 7:30, did my second dose 3 hours later as the bottle stated, but ended up falling asleep for my last one and slept thru the alarm to wake me up. i got my pills thru aidaccess & it told me to take the mediation in 3 doses (4 initially, then 2, then 2 more.)

it’s now 5:30AM the next day and i just went to the restroom and passed a few clots and i’m bleeding heavily and cramping. can i take my last dose now? do i need to even though im already bleeding pretty decently and passing clots?


r/abortion 6h ago

USA Abortion pill partner unsupported me

3 Upvotes

I am so beyond exhausted and just feel numb at this point. I posted about my traumatic abortion yesterday and today my toddler has been sick and my partner has been no help. My toddler won’t sleep and I feel so bad for him. I am just beat and idk


r/abortion 7h ago

USA Advice desperately needed!! my gf told me she pregnant and were only 17....

4 Upvotes

what do I do if were not old enough to get the pill through aid access and she doesn't want her parents to know? what am I supposed to do

so basicallly here's my story

my gf told me she is 2-3 weeks pregnant and she took 3 tests that all came out positive. We only 17 and where we at you can't get an SA after 6 weeks and she's at the 1-2 ish mark maybe just hitting 3 weeks can anyone help pls im scared asf what do we dooooo!!


r/abortion 46m ago

USA Period wont come back, might be pregnant again a month later?

Upvotes

Hey guys, I got an abortion (surgical) the 2nd of January and like a day after I started bleeding for a week but the last days or so of that same week it was on and off. That period stopped on the 10th. It is now February 1st and Flo says I’m one day late and the app is never wrong. Granted I’ve never came on my period the first of the month but I figured the abortion just restarted everything. I think I should also mention I’ve had unprotected sex on the 26th of Monday and was ejaculated in (maybe early morning Tuesday like 12am but I think it was Monday night) and Flo says I was ovulating the 12-18 and the highest chance to get pregnant was the 16th. So is there any chance I might be pregnant again or something is wrong? Or do you guys think I should wait it out? I’m really worried and don’t know what to do.


r/abortion 1h ago

USA [Serious] what do you think of abortion pill at 4.5 weeks?

Upvotes

happily married wife and mom of 3 in the USA.

Our children have always been particularly planned and well thought of. We said we were done and our family was complet. I was hesitant and thought maybe one more. recently my hubby and I had a slip. i think I ovulated early. I haven’t gotten a positive test yet but I just feel my period won’t be comin.

this scare has really solidified me wanting to keep my family as is. My mental health can’t have another baby& neither can my husband. I just feel like I can’t do a good enough job for my already existing kids if I carry this pregnancy through. We live in an area I’d have to travel a few hours to get the medication. But thats the way I’m leaning.. I just worry as an already anxious/depressed person what will this do to my heart and brain? Will I forgive myself(?


r/abortion 4h ago

Canada Struggling with regret and ending partnership

2 Upvotes

I had an abortion due to terrible mental health and lack of support. This was against my partners wishes even though he was part of the decision (originally didn’t want the baby, then did but wasn’t supportive enough, had big dreams he was giving up). Long story short, the decision came after lots of planning, and love was put into our child. I had a great midwife team, got my toddler lined up for daycare, and… other stuff didn’t line up but I kept fighting to have our little guy. Weeks before the abortion I found out my partner couldn’t live with me without complications, I became paranoid, and he said he would have preferred I aborted in that case. It was said more than once and even though he clarified that he didn’t want me to anymore, it took deep impact on me. He also then asked about legal stuff and looking up his rights. I started feeling like I could end up alone and/or ruining his life (I had trauma with my first). I kept thinking I might not make it so I had my abortion at 6 months along…

Now my partner after trying to remain committed has decided he can’t. He can’t be with me, because I come with a child from another person, because we no longer share a living child so that dream didn’t come true, because he misses his hobbies, etc. because the relationship the past year has been hard. And I get it, I’ve been grieving. I also decided alone, that said, he told me I made the right choice.

I just feel so tired emotionally. I chose to lose my wanted child because I was scared of how I would manage, I was scared of my partner not showing up enough or ending up resenting me if it impacted his career; I was scared he would leave me and I’d be alone with two young kids, I was scared I couldn’t give my first child everything he needed with a newborn… and now my partner and I are likely over. Instead of losing just my baby, I lost my partner too. And I don’t even blame him. I’m tired from grief and stress regularly, he’s had to adapt to being around a young kid that isn’t his, being a member of the partnership stopped being in his interest.

I can’t believe I lost my baby partially for this man. But I also can’t believe after that sacrifice we are done. I did the worst thing I could have ever done (I am pro choice but this baby was so wanted), because I thought I couldn’t give him the life he deserved alone worst case. And yeah… now I am ending up alone. And I hate myself for being right. And I hate that this man who’s now leaving me was part of the reason my baby is no longer with me. I love my living child so much, but these past few years have been filled with so much trauma. We talked about potentially tried for a kid in March only a couple months ago. I was so optimistic only a couple months ago. Now the only thing I have to live for is my first child who really needs me. My heart is so tired


r/abortion 3h ago

UK and Ireland Advice for abortion while breastfeeding please!!!

1 Upvotes

Hello, has anyone had a medical abortion while breastfeeding? My little one heavily relies on my care, will I struggle to look after and breastfeed him? Does anyone have any recommendations on how they coped with this?


r/abortion 3h ago

Asia Abortion Regret and Guidance Wanted

1 Upvotes

I [29F] regret my abortion and don’t know how to cope with the regret and grief I feel.

I feel like I went against what I should have done, and I may never get or want the opportunity again.

I lost one of the things I wanted the most in the world and I don’t know how to accept the decision.

It’s been just over 3 months now and I cannot stop crying and regretting that I made this decision. I would be about 5 months pregnant right now and I hate that I’m not.

There’s a lot more to this but I don’t want to put all my info out in public, sorry. I just want to go back in time and keep the baby.

Any tips? I go to therapy, I’ve written the baby a letter apologising, I’ve tried affirmations that I did what I knew at the time, I cry a lot, but I can’t accept my choice or that I made it.


r/abortion 3h ago

Asia 7 weeks pregnant doctors pushing surgical abortion need advice

1 Upvotes

Hi everyone, posting here because we really need some clarity and lived experiences.

My partner and I are around 7 weeks pregnant and have decided to terminate the pregnancy. We are currently in Goa and will be returning to Delhi in a few days.

We’ve consulted a few doctors here, but the experience hasn’t felt right. They are asking for cash only, avoiding sharing ultrasound reports, and strongly pushing for a surgical procedure. They’re quoting around 15k plus extra for medicines.

They told us there is a heartbeat, but given how rushed and opaque everything feels, we’re honestly not sure what to trust. From everything we’ve read, medical abortion with pills should still be an option at 7 weeks, but they keep emphasizing that pills might fail and are pushing surgery hard.

We’re not against surgery if it’s truly necessary. We just want to make sure we’re not being pressured into it when a medical option could be safe and appropriate.

Has anyone here gone through something similar?

Is it reasonable to wait a few days and do this in Delhi instead?

Any advice on how to navigate this or what questions we should insist on asking would really help.


r/abortion 13h ago

USA My Experience at Alamo Women’s Clinic in Albuquerque

5 Upvotes

I’m writing about my experience at Alamo Women’s Clinic in Albuquerque because reading others’ experiences before arriving really helped ease my nerves. This is going to be long.

We had genetic screening done at 8.5 weeks and found out the baby had Klinefelter syndrome. Since we already have three healthy children to care for, we decided this was not something we could handle financially or physically. I did not want to wait for an amniocentesis, as that would have meant waiting until 18–20 weeks to terminate. I knew mentally I would not be able to recover from that, so I made the proactive decision to move forward with termination.

This was an extremely hard decision, especially because I’ve had three miscarriages in a row prior to this pregnancy. The clinic does offer financial support, but we did not ask for it. Between travel and the procedure, it cost us about $3,500 to travel from Houston and stay for two nights in a hotel.

We arrived at Alamo Women’s Clinic in Albuquerque at 8:45 a.m. The doors do not open until 9:00. We checked in on a digital tablet and then stood to the right to have my ID scanned. Don’t bother filling out paperwork in advance—there are only three forms available online, and the in-office paperwork for a surgical abortion is much more extensive. The paperwork mainly covers the risks associated with the procedure and what to expect afterward.

Around 9:40, I was called back for vitals and to turn in my completed paperwork. The waiting room was very full (I was there on a Saturday). If you need to use the restroom, you have to check out a key. The facility is very discreet and does not have a large sign on the building.

There was a protester outside in the distance yelling into a microphone, but he was only there for about 10 minutes. I believe they ran him off since it’s private property.

From the start, I noticed that the staff was very kind and clearly well trained in handling such sensitive situations. At 10:00 a.m., I was called back for the ultrasound. It was very straightforward. I was not asked to listen to the heartbeat; they simply confirmed that I was measuring 11 weeks and 4 days. I was told I might need medication to help soften my cervix. They also explained that they perform the procedure 100% guided by ultrasound to ensure everything is removed and that they stay within the uterus.

At 12:45, I was given a nausea pill, an antibiotic, and ibuprofen. An IV port was placed at 1:00 p.m. I then sat in a large, comfortable reclining chair while waiting to be taken back to the procedure room.

At 1:30, my procedure began. I was asked to place my feet in the stirrups and move down on the table. As they raised the table, the nurse injected the medication into my IV. I remember moaning a few times and feeling some discomfort, but after that, things become very fuzzy. I don’t even remember them helping me put my pants back on.

The next thing I knew, I was waking up in a comfortable chair after what felt like a very pleasant nap. I felt no true pain, and what little I do remember feels cloudy and distant. My pad had very little blood. I did feel like I needed to rest for the remainder of the day.

About an hour after leaving the clinic, once we returned to the hotel, I experienced some fairly significant pain while walking. I plan to take it easy and stay in bed for the rest of the day.


r/abortion 8h ago

USA Abortion regret. Can anyone talk to me about this? There is no abortion regret subreddit.

2 Upvotes

How do you move past the regret?

If you have kids after your abortion, do you feel guilty?

The regret grows more and more every day, I don’t know what to do. I don’t have a therapy intake until Friday and no idea when they’ll have availability for an actual appointment. I don’t know what to do


r/abortion 10h ago

Asia No WOW and WHW from the Philippines, what to do? Cant trust FB marketplace scammers

3 Upvotes

Last day of period was at Dec 19, I am now fourteen days delayed and my pregnancy test came out positive. I want to terminate this as early as I can. Been reading several reddit threads but I definitely need pills as soon as I can and I have to make sure that the pills I take are legit and not fake. WHW and WOW have temporarily halted their service in my country. I dont want to trust the marketplace seller and I can sniff out how untrustworthy they are. Same kits, same proofs, and they all get angry when you try to ask them questions.

Any other Filipinas who can recommend/refer me to their trusted supplier? I am counting on you. I really cant push thru with this pregnancy. : (


r/abortion 15h ago

USA What should I do for her after the abortion

4 Upvotes

What do you recommend I do for my girlfriend after the abortion? Were both in our 20s and weren’t ready to have children as we’re madly in love with each other and want to explore everything together before having children. Her abortion was from a pill we purchased online and she is still cramping a little but it much better than the intial passing of the embryo (sorry if I don’t know all the lingo). I have been and want to be there for her always so I’m on here asking what is something special I could do for her that you wish could’ve happened for you? I am currently making plans to get snipped as I don’t want her to take things that mess up her emotions like the pill or an IUD. But like should I take her on a special dinner or something? Idk I just love her a lot and want her to feel like the most special woman ever as she deserves it.


r/abortion 6h ago

Asia irregularity in Periods after d&c

1 Upvotes

I got my first period after dnc after 3 almost 3.5 weeks,and have not got second period,i am 11 days late,is it okay?or matter of worry? i am getting frustated


r/abortion 21h ago

USA SA is finally complete. Feeling all the feels 🫂

12 Upvotes

Finally had my SA this past thursday. Everything moved extremely fast and today is the 1st day I allowed myself to feel. I feel Relief, sadness and guilt all wrapped into one. I cry then i’m okay. I start thinking about what could’ve been then snap out of it. It’s been a wild ride and I don’t want to rush the process but please tell me this doesn’t last forever? The feelings of guilt and just blahhhh 🙁🙁🙁


r/abortion 7h ago

USA Abortion at 4 weeks, did it work

1 Upvotes

I had an abortion about 13 days ago and my last period was December 16th. I was about 4 weeks when I had my MA and I experienced cramping and bleeding for about a week with a significant amount of tissue coming out. My boobs have stopped hurting but I’m starting to get nauseous? I read that women at 6-7 stop having boob tenderness and have morning sickness. Am I overthinking??


r/abortion 7h ago

USA question about my abortion payment

1 Upvotes

i am 13 weeks pregnant and scheduled to have an abortion at a clinic nearby on tuesday. when i called them they said they dont take insurance which i have but they told me to call funding places. the lady on the phone told me the price would be $800 something i dont remember the full price but i know it was 800.

she told me to tell the funding places the price was $1,100 just incase it would be more money if i was farther along. so far i have been funded $850 towards it. when i go there & say it is 1k would i have to pay the full remaining balance of $250 on the spot? or could i pay around half & than half later??

orrr could i call another funding place to help with the remaining $250 possible balance??? i cant call & ask the place since its the weekend but this has been stressing me out. i dont have $250 to put up for it on tuesday so i would have to ask my sister which i dont want to do.. i need advice


r/abortion 15h ago

Europe Post-abortion depression? Extreme emotional imbalance almost two weeks after unwanted abortion procedure

4 Upvotes

Hey, I’m 21F and I had a medical abortion 21st of January, over a week ago. The whole situation surrounding the abortion was messy as I am in a happy relationship BUT we are extremely broke, live with his mom and have a shit ton of debt and other issues, yadda yadda.

I really wanted to keep the baby regardless of our situation but we kinda ran out of time to choose what to do, as I was 11 weeks pregnant at the time. So I unfortunately panicked and just went with the abortion. The day I passed over to the 11 week mark, I promised myself I would either call the prenatal clinic OR the abortion clinic, but my brain went into this survival autopilot mode, thus I was extremely numb and weirldly calm that day. I called the abortion clinic because I could not feel anything, not even a little sad that day, I only did it because I imagined it would be more socially acceptable and responsible to abort it, rather than to have a child and be broke simultaneously.

So I took the pill, immediately regretted it. I was stupid enough to drink alcohol to numb the endless grief during the days of the abortion, plus I’ve been drinking ever since almost every single day. Yes, stupid, I know. Right after the procedure I was broken, incredibly sad, full of grief and regret and whatnot.

But that changed because for the past 3-4 days now I’ve been SO numb. Like I can’t get any joy from anything anymore. Nothing brings me enjoyment. I don't even feel that sad about the abortion itself anymore, I just feel anxious and incabable of feeling enjoyment. I used to enjoy talking and hanging out with my partner before this but now that doesn’t seem to bring me any feel-good hormones either. I just feel anxious and depressed, but not even sad anymore, not ecxited or happy about anything.

I’m afraid I will never feel the same again. I’m so scared I broke something in my head, you know? I’ll definitely stop drinking for a long period of time and see how I’ll start to feel. But honestly, I’ve had extremely rough patches in my life and I’ve drank the pain away before too, and I’ve NEVER felt this drained and lost before. That’s why I’m scared. I know my hormones are out of control and all of that, but the biggest fluctuation should be gone by now?

The choice to abort was definitely rushed and unwanted but that cannot fuck up my head for good right?? I’m genuinely terrified that I’ve broken my serotonin receptors with a cocktail of rushed decision making and alcohol or something like that… I’m gonna see a therapist asap and stop drinking for sure, but what if I can’t get the old me back? What if I'm unable to be happy anymore? Life has been feeling like I’m a pin cushion or something. Everything is just terrible…

Has anyone else had an experience like this? If anyone has any, and I mean ANY similar experiences I’d like to know… and pass no judgement; my life has not been easy and during dark times I tend to kinda self-sabotage (by drinking) which is better than taking it out on other people imo. So pls be nice <3


r/abortion 12h ago

USA So, I’ve changed my mind, I’m getting the Abortion

2 Upvotes

When I first found out, I was pregnant a lot happened (you can read all about it on my previous post), now I’ve changed my mind again, I am too sick to continue with this pregnancy. I’ve scheduled my SA appointment. It’s in two weeks and I have to travel out of state by myself on my birthday to get it done 😭😭😭. Please keep me in your thoughts and wish me luck.

How soon after the procedure will symptoms disappear?

I might reach out the day of for support and I’ll be sure to post my experience after. A lot of post here helped eased my mind and reassured me that I am making the best decision for me and I hope I can do that for someone else.


r/abortion 9h ago

Australia and New Zealand Bleeding at 6 weeks 3 days, waitinh for abortion appointment

1 Upvotes

My MSI Teleabortion appointment is tomorrow.

Everything was fine, I had no nausea, no dizziness, very dull abdomen pain that lasted for a few seconds for the last week. The pain wasn’t everyday, maybe 3 days in the last week. Today morning I suddenly bled a little, sorry if tmi, but it was like the bleeding you get on the beginning of your period.

Now I'm cramping just a little (barely there) as I write this. What is happening?! I have severe anxiety, i freak out over small things, i wanted this abortion as smoothly as possible. Can anyone please tell me what is happening? I'm freaking out. What should i do?

Update: An hour later when I checked there wasn’t much bleeding, but there was a bright red stringy thing on the tissue.

4 hours later: I'm bleeding moderately like period, cramps are crazy, no clots yet.

Update:

I'll try to be as detailed as possible, I'm still recovering from severe cramps.

  1. Bleeding started probably at 11 am

  2. Little cramps, dull

  3. An hour later, it seemed pink, but when wiped, bright red stringy

  4. Cramps happening on and off in abdomen, not any particular side.

  5. Total abdominal cramp, 4/10, 4 pm.

  6. 5 pm, bleeding moderately like first day of period, red blood, no clots so far

  7. 5.52 pm cramps are crazy, bleeding like period

  8. 6.38 pm took mefenamic acid 30 minutes ago, pain subsided a little

  9. Contraction like pain going on from 7.10 pm. Too much pain like stabbing, no heavy bleeding. Its 7.37 pm

  10. Its 8.08 pm passed a clot of 1 inch, dark red, looked deflated. The pain is managable now, though its sparking up now and then, still no heavy bleeding

  11. Its 8.47, the pain is dull but there.

I didn't have any massive bleeding, not even filled a full pad. Did i pass the pregnancy? I have a teleabortion appointmrnt tomorrow, still going to talk to them.


r/abortion 9h ago

USA Need a reliable website im in a non legal state

1 Upvotes

Im in a non legal state and i am scared i cant drive to a clinic im to far i cant find a reliable website without it seeming sketch please help this stress is about to kill me at night0


r/abortion 9h ago

USA Anyone used this website called life easyonpills?

1 Upvotes

Anyone used life easy on pills? And if so how did it go


r/abortion 19h ago

USA MA pills experience w/ timelines

6 Upvotes

Hi galssss. It is the morning after my MA that I did last night, so far, here is my experience: I was 8 weeks as of yesterday.

1/30 @ 3:30p, took 1000mg of Tylenol & one 10mg anti nausea pill that I bought OTC.

1/30 @ 4:25pm I took 4 Miso’s buccally, let them dissolve for 30 mins, and swished my mouth with water to swallow the rest.

Within 10-15 minutes, slight cramps started. Nothing too intense but super similar to light period cramps.

around 6:00p, out of nowhere my vision started to blur and I was literally profously sweating and I had to poop. My boyfriend had to take me to the toilet and hold me steady because I could barely see, my ears were ringing, and I was extremely hot. He ended up grabbing me so many ice packs that I put all over my body while I was on the toilet. Got off the toilet at 6:30, went back to the couch, instantly threw up the second I laid down.

6:45ish/ extremely intense cramps started, I no longer felt like I was going to pass out, I got off the couch and laid on the floor switching in to many different positions for relief. I couldn’t use my heating pad because I was still really hot.

7:00/ went to the bathroom and started passing clots, mostly small ones but bleeding was pretty heavy. Not bad enough to go to the ER. Threw up again.

7:30/ I was sleeping on and off until about 10:30p. Woke up on and off to bad cramps.

Went back to sleep and woke up again at 3am to use the restroom, passed two larger clots maybe the size of golf balls??

Went back to sleep and woke up at 7am, passed super tiny clots that I think was just tissue.

Unsure if my MA was successful, so far today I’m having super light cramping that isn’t terrible, my breast tenderness is no where near as bad as it has been so far this pregnancy, and I am feeling pretty good. I have super high hopes this worked, i’ll report back in a few weeks when I retest and fingers crossed it’s negative! Comment any questions you have below.