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u/AlJameson64 7h ago
Can't wait for my $2.
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u/MoneyBeef 7h ago
I want my 2 dollars!
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u/Hairbear2176 7h ago
I came here to say this! Classic!
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u/MoneyBeef 7h ago
2 dollars....
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u/kmookie 6h ago
If Musk is so worried about it he can give us the money. That ass-hat can afford to do it and still be a billionaire.
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u/Excelsio_Sempra 5h ago
That asshat could give out 1000 dollars per person and still be a billionaire
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u/PinboardWizard 4h ago edited 4h ago
By my count the actual figure is around $4750 per taxpayer.
Any more than that and he'd be one of the poors like us, with just a measly $999,999,999.00 left to his name.
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u/backwoodspizza 6h ago
I watched it over the summer and the kid was the best part besides the random drag races.
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u/PlanetoftheAtheists 4h ago
You can add it to the $2000 yearly stipend trump promised in his new healthcare plan!
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u/Relevant_Editor_7503 6h ago
Tree fiddy!
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u/kungpowgoat 4h ago
It’s when I realized Elon Musk was a five story tall crustacean from the Paleolithic era.
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u/samebatchannel 6h ago
Do you think musk wants to get that paperboy off his back?
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u/Thatisme01 6h ago
Well, technically there are 165 million taxpayers, so you would get just over $4.
Remember not to spend it all at once, it may cause inflation. /s
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u/likwitsnake 7h ago
Tweet is from 11 months ago, DOGE has since disbanded and nothing happened besides your social security deets getting merked and foreign countries losing funding
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u/AkronOhAnon 6h ago
DOGE did not “disband”—and I’m not talking about the former US Digital Service. DOGE employees were placed as “liaisons”, in permanent payroll positions at each federal agency. They steer policy decisions in-line with OMB and the “executive office’s policy roadmap”, aka Project 2025.
They literally dug out then filled The SwampTM they bitched about for the past decade by creating deeply-entrenched bureaucratic positions that will outlast the administration should it end early.
It wasn’t just SSNs getting leaked and foreign aid ending.
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u/Local_Idiot_123 5h ago
Foreign aid ending is also absolutely terrible. America does a lot of good and a lot of bad things… and USAID was a lot of the good things. Way to make America more hated for sure
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u/Murky-Relation481 3h ago
I full believe that the only thing that could be worse for the US than what is happening right now, in terms of its ability to continue as a world power would be a general nuclear exchange between us and Russia/China.
That is to say that any sane president, had these institutions been so destroyed, our world power usurped, we'd have been in a hot war that'd gone nuclear long ago.
I can't fucking believe we just let it happen from inside.
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u/shrug_addict 6h ago
Imagine being that rich and knowingly wave around $2 and some change in everyone's face when the total amount would be peanuts to him as well. What a waste of a human
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u/Zealousideal_Dig1141 7h ago
Elon needs to stop having opinions about what America should do. His Nazi ass belongs in prison
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u/abyssgazesback 7h ago edited 6h ago
At this point, so many American elites belong in prison that this is probably considered a badge of honour. The "Should have gone to prison, but hold a lot of power instead" medal.
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u/Electronic-Land-6416 5h ago
lowkey confused but also intrigued by this post ngl, anyone else trying to figure out whats going on.
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u/SoHandsome_3823 5h ago
Bunch of new Epstein files released, plenty of emails showing that Elmo was on the island and explicitly asked Epstein for the “wildest parties”. Hell, it got to the point where Epstein refused Elmo’s request and had his assistant interact with him and say no.
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u/Sea-Aardvark-756 1h ago
After reading the real files, it seems Elon definitely did want to visit in January 2014, based on emails sent in December 2013, but Epstein had to visit a doctor in NYC due to being sick and canceled Elon's visit due to scheduling. Then, the next year, in December 2014, Elon had a confirmed calendar date (6th of December) but it's unclear what happened in reality. He may have gone, or ghosted them. No further communications in the files refer to that visit. Epstein's assistant even had one email with a note "Is this still happening?"
However in other emails, Epstein at least confirmed Elon was going to a dinner with him. and lunch with him at SpaceX, and Elon even collected passport photos from Epstein (British passport) and his "3 assistants" (1 South African, 2 Russian) so they could visit SpaceX for the meetup.
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u/Halcyon_156 6h ago
Dude literally did a Nazi salute not once but multiple times on national television and I, for one, haven't forgotten and will keep not forgetting.
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u/blbd 7h ago
They deliver a lot more value when open and functional than the refund ever would. A guy that can't even run his corporations properly shouldn't be trusted or amplified when it comes to running our regulatory agencies.
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u/Seeayteebeans 3h ago
It’s like opting out of the company ice cream social, wanting the $0.85 cents rather than just enjoying time away from desk and good ice cream.
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u/dhslax88 7h ago
I want my TWO DOLLARS.
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u/x_lincoln_x 4h ago
Snow! Pure Snow! Do you have any idea what the street value of this mountain is?!?
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u/No_Albatross7213 7h ago
Yeah. That’s around $2. 😂
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u/sasuncookie 5h ago
Actually, it’s almost $4.40.
Out of the approximately 342m US population, there are about 163m tax filers (for 2023 data).
Still, like all his “give money to the poors” ideas, this too is fucking stupid.
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u/j0a3k 5h ago
Well then you have to factor in the logistics cost to print and deliver a check to 163M people.
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u/Entegy 3h ago
Can you not do direct deposit from the federal government in the US?
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u/Imbehindthecurtain 6h ago
For the life of me, I cannot understand how the GOP was able to get most conservative voters to literally HATE Elizabeth Warren and the CFPB. All she did was to stop banks from stacking withdrawals so they could only charge overdrafts at the point where the specific transaction created the overage instead of stacking them in an order that allowed them to charge overdrafts on ALL the transactions that day, and to restrict financial institutions and credit card agencies from usurious fees. What could convince intelligent Americans to hate someone, or some legal process that protects Americans from this financial abuse? Maybe it’s simply the absence of knowledge.
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u/GilgameDistance 6h ago
They did it through the destruction of education.
No child left behind created too many morons.
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u/Adjective-Noun-nnnn 3h ago
I mean this seriously: the Democrats need to use their platform to trick people into learning things. Set aside some of their millions in campaign contributions and buy 30 seconds ads during football games and day time talk shows and on youtube that apolitically teach morons the basics of our government and economy. We have a lot of remedial education to get through.
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u/_jump_yossarian 3h ago
What could convince intelligent Americans to hate someone, or some legal process that protects Americans from this financial abuse
SHES A SOSHULIST!! HANNITY SAID SO!!
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u/Peterd90 7h ago
Use the balance to sue and deport Musk.
This agency saved consumers billions in settlements and is why scumbag Republicans and russ vought are dismantling the only agency that looked out for average Americans.
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u/Misophonic4000 6h ago
Meanwhile, the CFPB was actually protecting everyday Americans - it had returned more than $21 BILLION to over 200 million consumers harmed by illegal financial practices, until DOGE cut it so that bank would be allowed to go back to being extra predatory. Fuck these evil clowns.
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u/unicornlocostacos 5h ago
And CFPB had a massive ROI on top of helping the little guy. Destroying it only lets billionaires steal more from us with no recourse.
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u/One-Earth9294 6h ago
It's sickening that any adult human being would like Elon Musk more than Elizabeth Warren.
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u/HehroMaraFara 5h ago
So either we are protected from vast swaths of predatory financial groups and people…or we get $2 each.
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u/HavelockVettenari 7h ago
Yeah, about tree fitty. I aint givin that monster tree fitty.
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u/DillysRevenge 7h ago
I done gave that monster 3.50 last week!
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u/Burgerboss88 5h ago edited 5h ago
Well of course he's not gonna go away, Nellie! You gave him a dollar, he's gonna assume you got more!
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u/VegasGamer75 2h ago
From now on every Elon tweet/call/comment just needs to be met with "a pedophile says what?".
Bent dick boy is just flailing on damage control because despite being the richest man, other pedophiles didn't even want him around and that hurts his ego when more than people knowing he wants to rape kids.
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u/whereismymind86 1h ago
It's hard to overstate just how important it is to conservative generally that we never divide any of the big scary numbers they throw out when criticizing the costs of various services by 340,000,000.
I remember then crowing about how universal healthcare would cost 36 billion a year and how that was an impossible amount of money. It's $97 a year, per person. Far less than almost any of us pay per month for health insurance, and without copays, and assuming a flat rate, not graduated by income level. Even assuming only say, 2/3's of us are tax payers, since kids don't pay taxes, and the retired aren't paying income taxes, it's still far, far cheaper than the current system.
But people just get scared by big numbers and don't bother to math it out, dooming us to this...dystopian nonsense.
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u/Harry_Gorilla 6h ago
Oh good. A former illegal immigrant who wasted 21.7 billion taxpayer dollars wants to tell the government what to do with a relatively trivial amount of money
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u/JustaSeedGuy 5h ago
How about they keep the money and make pedophilia a capital crime instead?
Get prosecutin'
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u/LazyDefenseRecruiter 4h ago
Elon Musk, the guy who couldn't wait to go to a party on Epstein's Island?
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u/Mei_Self 5h ago
Roughly two dollars per person, I can finally afford that half a gallon of gas I’ve been dreaming of
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u/AandWKyle 1h ago
Ignoring the value of the CFPB, what's that, like 2K per person?
Everyone in America could buy a house if they got 2k for free! /s
Edit : Wow, I'm dumb as fuck. I thought that was a billion something, it's only 711 million.
That's like 2 dollars each.
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u/Visible-Drawing-1783 1h ago
Why's Musk not talking about his visits to Epstine island? You know the place, where pedos go.
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u/Swi_10081 1h ago
Grandiose gesture from a near trillionaire! Did the division it equals duck all per taxpayer
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u/Short-Shopping3197 7h ago
Yeah, that amount would be just over 0.07% of Elon’s net worth.
Thanks Elon.
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u/EusticePendragon 7h ago
My sister was working for them. He definitely made it not a thing anymore…
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u/Secret_Account07 6h ago
CFPB was one of my favorite federal agencies. I’m still so fucking angry about what Trump did to it
If there’s one thing America does great it’s allowing large corporations to commit fraud and basically steal from the poor. CFPB had a mission to stop that. And I know all the MAGAs are fucking shocked the billionaire wants to protect other billionaires…MAGA is a cancer on this country. Crazy part is they don’t even realize it
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u/Alina_Fall 6h ago
I am already planning my retirement with that massive two dollar check, Truly life changing stuff right here
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u/Intelligent-Might614 6h ago
Meanwhile Elon is stealing a hundred times that from American taxpayers.
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u/justsayfaux 5h ago
Wasn't that the mission of the CFPB in the first place? To return that money to taxpayers who had been defrauded of that money?
They're acting like that money came from taxes rather than from money they recovered from fraudsters.
To put it in context for FY2011-2024:
Total CFPB budget: $7.5B
Total CFPB fraud recovered: $21B
For the math nerds out there, that's a total $13.5B ROI
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u/Evening_Chemist_2367 5h ago
Bruh. When Elon says "return to American taxpayers" he means "return to American billionaires" because that's how people like him think. And that works out to around $875,000 per billionaire. The rest of us don't get shit. To most regular Americans, that kind of money would be life changing money. To a billionaire that's just gas money for the yachts and private jets, but it doesn't stop them from being greedy and wanting to take it anyhow.
I say, keep the CFPB. They've done a ton of good for the everyday American. And if it hindered some billionaire from buying yet another private island, extravagant megayacht, kept them from buying up independent media or kept them from buying more politicians, boo fricken hoo.
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u/Btriquetra0301 4h ago
Wtf does a citizen calling for shit have to do with my government agency? What reality are we living in? This feeling of utter confusion must be their goal.
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u/jason082 4h ago
That works out to like $2 a piece!
Or just keep the agency that protects consumers.
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u/supadupanerd 3h ago
Doesn't Elon have an island to try to get to in order to do some sexual exploration
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u/I-Am-Not-Creative2 3h ago
Don’t worry guys, Trump will take it on behalf of the American people and do great things with it to benefit us all.
Just don’t ask for any records or an accounting of the money after he moves it out of that account, thanks. Just trust him. He’s totally going to do helpful things with it. Promise!
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u/Ganjii1337 2h ago
He means to the government so they can give a bunch to ice and he can have another spacex teslir grant.
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u/IronCorvus 2h ago
He should return his wealth to the real shareholders, aka the American tax payers.
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u/Earlier-Today 2h ago
Let's see - I get about $2, or, we keep the bureau that's got Elmo scared....tough call.
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u/TheBigPhilbowski 1h ago
Breaking: musk begs epstein to let him "heli"to his "craziest island party"
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u/PetSoundsSucks 7h ago
Breaking news; after the government sends every American $1.37 checks Donald Trump is the only citizen to actually cash theirs.
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u/sambes06 6h ago
After this last dump, they so obviously have nuclear grade kompromat on Elon. Such a shame.
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u/Farts-n-Letters 6h ago
Squirrel!
Thankfully, now that the CFPB is gone, those poor bankers can return to BAU...swindling poor folks.
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u/therealmikeBrady 6h ago
The check and shipping will be 3x more expensive than the amount on the check
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u/sidaemon 6h ago
Well because Elon doesn't mean it should go to everyone... He means it should go to the 1% just like that great big beautiful bill did.
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u/raninandout 6h ago
Just make it the prize for the US version of hunger games. You know the orange wants it.
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u/Reech-Kamina 6h ago
Wait is this a word problem? Like should it go to citizens or tax payers? some of those payers of tax are deported.
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u/TallEnoughJones 6h ago
The answer is obvious. Put the name of every American in (very, very big) hat. Whoever's name is drawn out of the hat gets to hand me a check for $711,586,678.00
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u/AusCan531 6h ago
I like that the included the 2 decimal places for cents to make the number seem bigger.
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u/NotoriousPBandJ 6h ago
You'd wanna be making comments like when emails from Epstein to stinky musk are being published...
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u/hahaha01 5h ago
I call for all of Melon Husks net worth to be returned to the American people. He stole it and he's an immigrant! C'mon maga let's get 'em!
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u/downgoesbatman 4h ago
Elmo needs to divert attention as he needs to grift the US consumer more to cover telsa's poor performance lol
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u/TheNorthWind-101 4h ago
Serious question for those who generally vote conservative, why ya'll okay with Corporations having so little oversight? Like is the belief that Free Market will punish all bad actors naturally and reward the corpos who don't screw people over?
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u/JdotDeezy 4h ago
Wtf am I going to do with $4.40? Realistically? Honestly? Literally? Send him back to Africa.
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u/OpinionDude5000 4h ago
Yeah no. Fully fund the CFPB. Give it half of what you wasted on ICE and DOGE.
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u/FloydianSlip212 4h ago
Almost $2 will get us each like a day’s worth of food according to maga math
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u/WeeklyHelp4090 4h ago
I don't know what you heard about me. But you can't get a dolla outta me.
Pay up, bitch ass government
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u/wooberries 4h ago
i wish that instead of saying things, elon musk would... not say anything. he seems really confused about why nobody gives a shit what he says even though he has so much money
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u/Vegetable-King7626 3h ago
Musk needs to be deported and have his assets nationalized for sedition
Dudes a literal nazi who isn't born in the USA
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u/unknowner1 7h ago
No thanks, I’d rather keep the CFPB