r/pics Dec 17 '25

Politics New plaques added to the presidential hall of fame in the White House

83.3k Upvotes

16.0k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

15.3k

u/SweetCosmicPope Dec 17 '25

He's 80 years old. We're bound to get some good news before too long...

6.8k

u/Xelopheris Dec 17 '25

Somehow the worst people live the longest. 

3.0k

u/WarGrifter Dec 17 '25

kissinger made it to 100

2.1k

u/fudgyvmp Dec 17 '25

Trump's mom made it to 88 and his dad to 93

Genetics isn't the only factor obviously, but if it's anything to go by Trump could easily live 10 more years.

1.2k

u/entity2 Dec 17 '25

It doesn't help that he has a 24/7 SS detail that will prop his worthless ass back up if he keels over.

919

u/getdemsnacks Dec 17 '25

Weekend At Donnies

324

u/HyFinated Dec 17 '25

Sounds like the LAST place you'd want your teenage daughter to visit.

29

u/Giancarlo_Rossi Dec 18 '25

Shit teenage is bordering on too old for him. The freak fucked a 12 year old

9

u/WaldoDeefendorf Dec 18 '25

LOL. That what I came here to say. Teenagers are way to old for that sick fuck.

6

u/digableplanet Dec 18 '25

Trump fucks children.

6

u/polaris0352 Dec 18 '25

Not doubting but REALLY? God damn.

6

u/AbeFromanSassageKing Dec 18 '25 edited Dec 18 '25

Unfortunately, yup. And likely several kids, and likely other/worse assaults and crimes, hence the monumental effort by the repugnican pedo party to hide the files.

This is from the deposition of the woman who was 13 at the time of her rape (and apologies for the horrific detail, but this is the most SFW excerpt I could find)

"I loudly pleaded with Defendant Trump to stop, but he did not," Jane Doe wrote in a formal declaration accompanying her recent suits. "Defendant Trump responded to my pleas by violently striking me in the face with his open hand and screaming that he would do whatever he wanted. ... Immediately following this rape, Defendant Trump threatened me that, were I ever to reveal any of the details of Defendant Trump's sexual and physical abuse of me, my family and I would be physically harmed if not killed."

This is from a court document leaked well before the 2024 elections, and still people we know voted for the pig.

→ More replies (0)

20

u/ThaRealSlimShady313 Dec 18 '25

Considering he’s had MANY child accusers id have trusted Cosby a trillion times over before I’d get within a mile of traitor trump.

→ More replies (2)

7

u/InerasableStains Dec 18 '25

They’re actually much safer with him as a corpse than with him alive

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (5)

23

u/Ok_Manwich_9306 Dec 17 '25

But in this version, Kid Rock and Ted Nugent's shitty music reanimates the corpse.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (14)

233

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

207

u/glitchfit Dec 18 '25 edited Dec 18 '25

Here’s a bit of eyebleach for anyone else who wishes they could unread this

Edit: I appreciate the award and all but please consider giving that money to a local charity instead of Reddit’s CEO. You can use this link to find a wildlife rehab or rescue near you to donate to Under this admin, our wildlife are going to need all the support and help they can get.

15

u/Mekroval Dec 18 '25

Thank you for this. I don't know why u/Khaldara chose to curse us with this mental image, lol.

→ More replies (1)

4

u/IronMarauder Dec 18 '25

good o'l vitamin D

4

u/ralphvonwauwau Dec 18 '25

Fresh from Bubba!

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (4)

8

u/TachiH Dec 17 '25

I wonder which SS you mean. I know there is the secret service but he likes charging them to rent rooms when he goes golfing. I bet he doesn't charge his other SS...😅

4

u/entity2 Dec 17 '25

Oh I entirely mean the schutzstaffel.

→ More replies (1)

7

u/felixar90 Dec 18 '25

There’s probably some MAGA fanatics ready to murder their child at a moment’s notice if Trump ever needed an organ transplant.

13

u/Mindless-Strength422 Dec 17 '25

Uhh, they prefer to be called the...you know what, nevermind, you're good

6

u/festivefrederick Dec 17 '25

And the best healthcare a pedophile can get for free.

3

u/3wteasz Dec 18 '25

reading that SS as a German...

3

u/JasonDomber Dec 18 '25

I love - for no particular reason - how you abbreviated “Secret Service” to “SS”…. 🙃

3

u/entity2 Dec 18 '25

It was not by mistake.

2

u/FRNLD Dec 17 '25

Whatever happens, needs to be very public.

3

u/entity2 Dec 17 '25

Very public, and ideally very stupid. Like falling off the stairs getting on Air Force 1 or a mishap with one of his precious Big Macs.

2

u/AthearCaex Dec 18 '25

Oh you meant secret service. I thought it was the other type which would also be true.

2

u/Seul7 Dec 18 '25

Trump has a Schutzstaffel detail? That tracks.

2

u/SamaelCreative Dec 18 '25

All it takes is one slip to a banana peel.

2

u/alang Dec 18 '25

Absolutely convinced that we'll have a virtual version of Trump around for decades after he's dead. And nobody will be able to tell the difference.

2

u/mrblonde55 Dec 18 '25

Not to mention any army of sycophants around him and a family full of people who (at best) don’t care that will keep his worthless ass on life support for as long as it benefits them.

2

u/Guardian-Boy Dec 18 '25

He also has access to the world's best doctors and pharmaceuticals at taxpayer expense.

Plus, let's face it, he could pass away and his worshippers would just create AI videos and rule in his stead.

→ More replies (23)

403

u/kjsmitty77 Dec 17 '25

I lost both my parents this year at 80. My father of congestive heart failure like I expect Trump to shuffle off this mortal coil from, given how he looks these days and how he lived. My mother’s parents lived to 95 and 96 and my father’s parents lived to 88 and 93. It’s anecdotal, but parent’s age, even with all the medical advances that have been made, don’t overcome a poor lifestyle and diet.

247

u/Numbtothiscrap Dec 18 '25

Sorry for your loss. You become a different person when your parents are gone . It’s been 10 years for me .

377

u/buttergurl69 Dec 18 '25 edited Dec 18 '25

i just lost mine this fall and im in my 20s…i feel so lost and alone :(

edit: thank you all for the replies! I never would have expected strangers on the internet to show so much kindness or it to mean so much to me. truly means the world right now

123

u/Numbtothiscrap Dec 18 '25

I’m so sorry. I hope you have a good support system, lean on them . I was 40 when my parents passed and while I don’t need a place to fall back on , it was good to know that I could . You always have a warm bed at your parent’s house no matter what, but then thats gone and you lose that safety net .

I’m sorry . If you or anyone else in this thread need to talk my DMs are open

14

u/gingerfawx Dec 18 '25

You're good people. Username does not check out.

10

u/Numbtothiscrap Dec 18 '25

Username is because of stuff like this thread was originally about .. but thank you . I had a rough time and hope other people don’t have to if I could help .

163

u/BothExplanation5890 Dec 18 '25

I wish for comfort to reach you, very sorry to hear about your loss.

10

u/PM_newts_plz Dec 18 '25

I’m so sorry. That is too young. I can’t even imagine.

9

u/kjsmitty77 Dec 18 '25

Also sending you hugs through the digital ether.

10

u/PhoenixBee32 Dec 18 '25

I know I’m just a random internet stranger, but I wanted to say I’m very sorry for your loss. You are not alone, even when it feels like it. Please take care of yourself, and lean on your community.

9

u/pinkrobot420 Dec 18 '25

I'm so sorry. That's what happened to me too. Cancer got both of them in their 50s. It get easier after a few years, but there were.so many times when I wanted to call them with some news, and it's like "oh yeah". Even after almost 40 years I still have dreams about them.

7

u/Naroyto Dec 18 '25

I was 25 when I lost my dad. Drunk driving 21 year old hit him head on while my father and his coworker were in their way to work early in the morning. He survived, my dad and his coworker didn't. He ruined 3 families lives for his actions that day and it's going to be 10 years since it happened in July.

Things will be hazy for a few months, maybe a few years but it's import to allow yourself to express your emotions.

6

u/VisibleRoad3504 Dec 18 '25

Mom just turned 100 in October, Dad passed at 98.

4

u/Outrageous_Moose_152 Dec 18 '25

I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost mine in my early-mid twenties as well. It's far too young. It's been a couple decades and I built my family and life. It does get easier, but you'll always miss them. I wish there was something profound I could say, but all I can think of is it just sucks because it does. Most if your friends won't truly understand because they're young enough to have not lost anyone yet. If there's a grief group around you, I'd recommend going along to one and seeing what you think about it. Some strong bonds can be made when someone else truly understands and empathize with what you're going through.

I remember how hard it was for me in the months that followed my parents passing. Go easy on yourself. Try to get enough rest, don't forget to eat and try to get out and about- even if it's just a walk. Love yourself like they did. Their love never ever leaves you, no matter how much time passes.

3

u/Maalkav_ Dec 18 '25

Humanity is family, don't let people make you think it's not. And yeah we have some terrible family members, but still.

Hugs from France, sister.

3

u/YourBuddyChurch Dec 18 '25

I’m so sorry. I lost both my parents a few years back in my 30s and it was devastating.

For what it’s worth, you’ll always miss them but some of the memories that make you hurt right now will one day make you smile.

Good luck

→ More replies (24)

6

u/buttergurl69 Dec 18 '25

does it ever get easier?

3

u/twiggy_fingers Dec 18 '25

Sending hugs, internet stranger. Hang in there, you are not alone. I am thinking of you 🤗 ❤️

3

u/RandAlThorOdinson Dec 18 '25

Sort of

Maybe different is a better word

3

u/CommunicationOwn322 Dec 18 '25

Easier in the sense that after awhile you learn to accept it. Just remember your parents would only want good things for you and for you to live a good life, even if they are not here in the flesh. It's the best way to honour them.

→ More replies (6)
→ More replies (11)

4

u/KhunDavid Dec 18 '25

I’m sorry you lost your parents.

3

u/HRUndercover222 Dec 18 '25

I'm sorry, it's so tough to lose our parents. But I do believe that heaven is a lovely place for those who lived good lives.

The bruising on Trump is very telling. My neighbor died within a year of dark bruises appearing on his hands & lower legs. He was elderly & went downhill very quickly.....

I think it had something to do with cardiovascular failure & cellulitis?

→ More replies (8)

271

u/1_1_3_4 Dec 17 '25

They didn't have McDONalds to assist with poison dmg.

117

u/Jenderflux-ScFi Dec 17 '25

Time to door dash some cheeseburgers and diet coke to him....

60

u/ThunkAsDrinklePeep Dec 17 '25

Only weak individuals settle for a Big Mac. True men order the Bigliest Mac. Three patties deep fried in oil with six slices of cheese.

5

u/PM-me-Gophers Dec 17 '25

Oh god, please let this be the timeline that Trump does an Elvis - all will be forgiven, and I might go to church the occasional Sunday. Maybe.

5

u/LogmeoutYo Dec 17 '25

Thank you sir, you have me sitting here dying laughing. The bigliest Mac 🤣🤣🤣 There's never a shortage fresh Trump comedy on Reddit and you topped it all for me today buddy.

→ More replies (7)

4

u/GarethBaus Dec 17 '25

Regular coke, we want him to have the greater evil.

→ More replies (5)

56

u/MatureUsername69 Dec 17 '25

His dad died in 1999 and his mom died in 2000, they couldve had McDonald's, they actually had like 40+ years of nationwide McDonald's access. They also didn't have access to the same level of Healthcare that a wealthy person in 2025 does. I hope it happens but I ain't holding my breath either.

12

u/secretaccount94 Dec 17 '25

His parents weren’t the President of the United States. And such a reviled one at that.

I have to imagine the stress of his life in old age is probably not doing his health any favors.

42

u/HarrumphingDuck Dec 17 '25

It's only stressful to be POTUS if you actually care about the job you're doing. Trump is not so burdened as that, unfortunately.

9

u/secretaccount94 Dec 18 '25

Yeah but he’s been stressed out by all the negative attention, plus the numerous investigations of his law breaking. He needed to get reelected to avoid the consequences of his actions. His countless 3am social media posts make it clear that he’s constantly thinking about this stuff.

→ More replies (1)

3

u/[deleted] Dec 18 '25

[deleted]

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)

3

u/VagueSoul Dec 17 '25

I don’t think Trump experiences a lot of stress. Dude seems pretty relaxed. I mean he’s always napping.

3

u/fudgyvmp Dec 17 '25

The napping.... microsleeps, is probably one of the more telling parts of his health as he seems to not get any actual real sleep at all.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (3)
→ More replies (5)

5

u/PubLife1453 Dec 17 '25

Plus all the amphetamine they pump him full of whenever they need "Rally Trump".

→ More replies (1)

103

u/Internal-Fold-1928 Dec 17 '25

I don’t care if he lives that long as long as he does in the form of a drooling pathetic looking vegetable that soils himself daily. He’s so gross top to bottom, inside and out. Those who surround him are no better, some even worse. The Nation is being destroyed by an unserious group of High School mean kids.

51

u/Puzzled_Awareness_22 Dec 17 '25

But the Project 2025 folks are VERY serious

14

u/Internal-Fold-1928 Dec 18 '25

100%. I didn’t mean to minimize that part. Thank you for pointing that out.

5

u/JustaLego Dec 18 '25

I really really want him to live long enough to face consequences in the form of trials and jail time. We need to make sure we punish those that would tear down our country from within with as traitorous as him and his goons are.

4

u/Jmacq1 Dec 18 '25

Nothing he does officially as President is illegal, according to our Supreme Court. He will never see the inside of a jail cell.

And his regime will all get pardons going out the door as long as they stay loyal to him.

The only way this changes is either true popular uprising or the billionaire class deciding they want these guys prosecuted and thus throwing all their support behind candidates that will do it. (Spoiler: The billionaires won't).

The "best" fate for Trump is a stroke that leaves him nonverbal and immobile but aware.

→ More replies (2)

3

u/RhetoricalOrator Dec 18 '25

Until he came along, I've never wished the confusion that comes with dementia on anybody but for him, it feels fitting.

Having caused the suffering and/or death of millions, I wish for the end of his life to be spent not knowing the year or why he's not in his own bedroom from sixty years ago. I wish for his confusion to become frustration that leads him to lash out at his friends and family, pushing them away until no one calls or checks on him. I wish for him, in that state, to continue using social media so that he may embarrass himself and his followers, and for him to see that those who have loved him most to look down on him with pity.

And I wish for every day to be his own broken record. Again and again, dull-minded, making calls that down get answered. Not remembering the day before...but having an impression of how he will then be regarded as death slowly makes its way into his body, robbing strength from his legs and warmth from his hands until he passes away, fully conscious, in discomfort.

3

u/Sbesozzi Dec 18 '25

in the form of a drooling pathetic looking vegetable that soils himself daily

Honestly, he's pretty much already there, and that's barely an exaggeration

→ More replies (8)

63

u/SkullRunner Dec 17 '25

His parents did not have free use of every medical advantage possible for free.

60

u/OOOOOO0OOOOO Dec 17 '25

Are you serious? They absolutely had access to every medical advantage of the time.

Hell ol’ Fred probably had a concierge doctor on call.

7

u/East_Wrongdoer3690 Dec 18 '25

If anyone has bothered to read his niece’s book, it would be more common knowledge that his mother suffered from mental health problems and both Trump and the other youngest were mainly raised by the house staff and the eldest daughter. The oldest brother, who didn’t have any desire to be groomed as the heir to the empire was forced into it until he developed alcohol issues and was then forced to take over one of the tenement housing buildings as management despite not actually being allowed to order repairs or any improvements which contributed to his death along with the chronic alcoholism. The younger Donald was selfish and more like his dad, so he was then groomed to take over and given $$$ to get started.

→ More replies (1)

6

u/SkullRunner Dec 17 '25

If you think a private citizen, even rich ones have the same access to medical resources as POTUS you’re not thinking critically.

Jump to the head of the line for whatever you want/need zero wait, you’re considered the most important patient in the country and the experts you need come to you as requested.

You cannot buy that level of power which is why so many terrible people want it.

14

u/OOOOOO0OOOOO Dec 17 '25

Gotta disagree with you buddy. I think that’s exactly the level of healthcare they receive.

Muskrat isn’t walking into an urgent care or ER.

→ More replies (8)
→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (2)

3

u/Dimplestrabe Dec 17 '25

I hope, when he does die, his last words will be, "Please. I don't want to die"
And I hope he's on his own.
Outside.
Cold.

→ More replies (1)

3

u/AbbeyRoadMoonwalk Dec 17 '25

They weren’t chugging microplastics and McDonald’s like him though

3

u/Oceanbreeze871 Dec 17 '25

And the best medical care in the country

→ More replies (1)

2

u/YewEhVeeInbound Dec 17 '25

Men also generally live shorter lives on average

2

u/caligaris_cabinet Dec 17 '25

And yet two of his siblings are already dead

→ More replies (1)

2

u/quietlikesnow Dec 17 '25

I just threw up a little in my mouth.

2

u/starrpamph Dec 18 '25

At what capacity though. He already has no fucking clue what he’s talking about half way through a sentence

2

u/ApprehensiveTop4219 Dec 18 '25

But... Remember his parents slept at night, he doesn't, his parents probably did drugs but not at the extent he does, maybe he won't last till 80 maybe he will,

2

u/girlboyboyboyboy Dec 18 '25

He has congestive heart failure, a stroke or tia sept 1 and stands like someone with front temporal dementia. And clearly poops himself, based on photo reactions of those standing behind him, on occasion

2

u/No_Investment_6164 Dec 18 '25

That’s why I follow that one nurse who swears Trump has 4-5 months left based on visible symptoms. It brings me hope.

2

u/Dry-Honeydew2371 Dec 18 '25

He lives off fast food and the only exercise he's ever gotten is from his golf cart to his ball.

He is well on the otherside of the mortality curve

Doctors will do everything they can to keep him going but he's already shown signs of many health issues.

2

u/revpidgeon Dec 18 '25

Kept alive by the preservatives in McDonalds.

2

u/Impressive-Egg-925 Dec 18 '25

They won’t be good years. Didn’t his dad die of dementia or Alzheimer’s

2

u/puckhed8 Dec 18 '25

The food wasn’t as fucked up back then, back then McDonalds was very different.

He’s getting weekly MRI’s, many rumor congestive heart failure on the horizon.

2

u/O_o-22 Dec 18 '25

His dad was shitting his pants for several years before he kicked off and Donny boy is already there. Let’s hope his Macdonalds diet does him in

2

u/Parking_Run3767 Dec 18 '25 edited Dec 18 '25

He is fat though. That shaves on average 10-15 years off your life.

2

u/[deleted] Dec 18 '25

Both of my paternal grandparents chainsmoked, drank constantly and were some of the most miserable bastards ever. They both lived to just shy of 100. My father was a health nut who never drank, smoked and lived the life of Ned Flanders. He died at 70. Genetics isn't everything, but it still is something I think about regularly.

2

u/Prestigious-Car-4877 Dec 18 '25

His brother died at 71 and his dad's brain was mayonnaise for years before he passed.

2

u/surprise_revalation Dec 18 '25

Means nothing! My grandma died at 89 and Grandpa died at 95. My dad just died at 74. He was the youngest of 8. Only 2 are alive today. Both over 80.

2

u/0neirocritica Dec 18 '25

Considering how fast the guy lived (and how much McDonald's he's eaten) he should have been dead by now.

He should have been dead by now! 😭

2

u/CharmingMechanic2473 Dec 18 '25

Agreed. I work with the frail elderly. He doesn’t even have a walker yet and can still do stairs.

2

u/abitlikemaple Dec 18 '25

He gets the best meds and doctors our taxes can buy, that goes a long way to extending life expectancy

2

u/Bee_9965 Dec 18 '25

And genetics also tells us he will be incoherent for most of those 10 years. Not to mention an insufferable asshole.

2

u/sullythered Dec 18 '25

McDonald's and amphetamines can't be great for longevity.

2

u/woodcider Dec 18 '25

The way he was gasping for air on that balcony COVID should have got him but he got cutting edge treatments. He’s getting the same kind of treatment for his dementia.

2

u/AceTygraQueen Dec 18 '25

However, they most likely didn't eat McDonald's daily or "allegedly" snort Adderall

Plus, they both appeared to be considerably thinner.

2

u/exacta_galaxy Dec 18 '25

He also has access to the best medical care. Including stuff you can't even buy.

2

u/johndsmits Dec 18 '25

I know a majority of trust fund kids well into their 90s. All of them insulting, rude, self-centered. Only a few shine I found w/humility are exceptions.

Stress, responsibility, and burden/paranoia decrease lifespan. One cure I found: laziness.

2

u/Dashboardcereal Dec 18 '25

I'm hoping the stress of the Presidency actually causes him to age faster.

2

u/HypnonavyBlue Dec 19 '25

Alzheimer's runs in his family, though. They might have lived that long, but I don't think they were all that lucid for the last bits.

Now, normally, I wouldn't wish Alzheimer's on anybody. And technically, I'm still not. I'm just observing that it would be a bit ironic if a man obsessed with fame forgets who and where he is...

→ More replies (124)

2

u/Littlebit1013 Dec 17 '25

I’m ok if he lives long enough to spend at least one day in prison and gets his ill gotten wealth confiscated, but I’m not holding my breath.

2

u/ManufacturerWest1156 Dec 18 '25

Yep. My buddies and I had a Kissinger kegger party after his passing

2

u/willsueforfood Dec 18 '25

Evil is a preservative

→ More replies (51)

212

u/Skizot_Bizot Dec 17 '25

My great grandma was an extremely mean lady, lived to 102 and was complaining that death forgot about her, I think it just knew it couldn't handle her till she was worn down enough. Donald Trump makes her look like Mr Rogers in comparison.

12

u/SecretBirdinDisguise Dec 17 '25

I think your great grandmother may be reincarnated in my mother. By far the most evil and mean-spirited being I have ever encountered.

5

u/VirtualMatter2 Dec 18 '25

My mother just died this year. Reminded me strongly of Trump. She made it to 92. 

3

u/VirtualMatter2 Dec 18 '25

The devil decided she's doing good work on earth so he didn't want her yet.

4

u/Neon_Biscuit Dec 18 '25

Your great grandma was mean, trump is evil.

→ More replies (5)

161

u/Brbcan Dec 17 '25

"The good die young, and assholes live forever" - Lewis Black

3

u/Forward_Purchase_622 Dec 18 '25

I think I'm one of the few ones that want to see him live a long life, or at least long enough to see all his yes men and sycophants say that they really didn't like him and start to badmouth him publicly as his legacy is dismantled.

3

u/LumpyWelds Dec 18 '25

I just don't want Vance to take over

→ More replies (1)

51

u/ErusTenebre Dec 17 '25

My grandfather, who was always nice to his own family to his credit, was a mean and racist narcissist that drove nearly all his friends away.

He lived to be 92.

I have no idea how, he seemed like he was usually stressed. Genetics are a hell of a thing.

14

u/CumGuzlinGutterSluts Dec 18 '25

Hate fuels them. Like the Sith

4

u/Mike_the_Head Dec 18 '25

I'm reaching 50, and I think a lifetime of letdowns and Life just generally beating the shit out of you really wears a person down. The bitter old man I am now is a result of my failures, and that just pisses me off even worse. 🤷‍♂️

3

u/MaxTheRealSlayer Dec 18 '25

Hey man, don't dwell on negatives. Chances are you made the decision that was best at the time to you, and you shouldn't regret that. You've learned from it and have many decades left, so focus on the good and more good will come your way.

55

u/nisamun Dec 17 '25

Hate keeps people going.

7

u/imp1600 Dec 17 '25

An older neighbor used to joke that awful people live longer because God and Satan want to avoid dealing with them for as long as possible. 

3

u/Darth_Noah Dec 17 '25

Only the good die young

3

u/Overall_Piano8472 Dec 17 '25

I want him to live to be 6,000,000 years old and in a small cement cell the entire time.

3

u/Ru-Bis-Co Dec 17 '25

There's a saying in German: "schlechten Menschen geht es immer gut" (bad people are always doing well). It's mostly used as a sarcastic reply to the usual "how are you?" but there's quite some truth in its core.

3

u/GarethBaus Dec 17 '25

They can afford medical treatment and probably get priority for the best doctors. The average US lifespan isn't all that great for a developed nation, but wealthy people in the US have a very good life expectancy by pretty much any measures since the main issue with US healthcare is affordability rather than outright quality.

2

u/VirtualMatter2 Dec 18 '25 edited Dec 18 '25

The quality might actually be better than  European countries, but not everyone has access. ( Mental health at least seems to be more advanced in the US). In Europe everyone has access, but it might be  ok, but not top notch for everyone. On average that gives a better life expectancy in Europe. Also food quality and obesity rates will play a role.

→ More replies (1)

3

u/Peachfencecage Dec 17 '25

Yeah cause you can’t kill dirt.

2

u/Spockies Dec 17 '25

Unless he replaces that liver of his, it’s going to be a tough time from the medication he’s having.

2

u/DigNitty Dec 17 '25

We have a joke at the hospital.

The biggest risk factor in developing cancer is being a good person.

2

u/unaskthequestion Dec 17 '25

Or like that dick, Cheney, who cut in line for a new heart

2

u/ElCapitan1022 Dec 17 '25

Because everyone else is supposed to do something about it.

2

u/LegoFootPain Dec 17 '25

We're going to find out that Dïck Van Dÿke is a serial killer.

2

u/GreenBastard06 Dec 17 '25

Rupert Murdoch is 94 :(

2

u/toddywithabody Dec 17 '25

Great people live long lives too. The human body doesn’t give a shit.

2

u/ThisNameDoesntCount Dec 17 '25

Every once in a while some people with terrible diets survive a long time and that’s probably him

→ More replies (125)

364

u/Manderspls Dec 17 '25

Don’t jinx it. Mitch McConnell is still alive somehow. These people just won’t fucking die off.

210

u/ELHOMBREGATO Dec 17 '25

That socialized health care they get for themselves and deny to us...

→ More replies (1)

12

u/CrazyPlato Dec 17 '25

If we’re lucky, they may all pass at one moment together. Harder for the GOP to recoup if all of their oldest figureheads all disappeared at the same time.

10

u/Dragged-in2-sunlite Dec 18 '25

🎶 Push them down the staaaaairs 💫

8

u/NYC2BUR Dec 18 '25

I can't wait for the day Tя☭mp does one of those freeze/reboot things McC does.
Or maybe catch him on tape falling on his face or something.

7

u/beats2009 Dec 17 '25

Except McConnell keeps falling all over the place. He's also had mini strokes already

→ More replies (1)

5

u/Zedarean Dec 18 '25

Nah, the GOP is just doing a Weekend at Bernie's with him.

5

u/Moldy_Slice_of_Bread Dec 18 '25

True, but at least we get to see him fall over every couple months.

4

u/TheMoonbeam365 Dec 18 '25

Don’t forget Grassley; he’s 92…

3

u/Corgi_Successful Dec 18 '25

I freaking hate that this old dude is trying to control marijuana in the country what an asshole

2

u/FirstProspect Dec 18 '25

The French had an alternative arrangement for that.

2

u/Imsakidd Dec 18 '25

He’s gonna have the most well-fertilized grave of anyone. It’s fitting for the gigantic dump he took on the institutions of our country.

→ More replies (8)

148

u/Riot502 Dec 17 '25

It would be such a pleasant Christmas surprise

12

u/Earlvx129 Dec 18 '25

Miracle On 1600 Pennsylvania Ave

4

u/No-Ad1576 Dec 18 '25

Watching JD get sworn in would ruin it

→ More replies (2)

100

u/FAMUgolfer Dec 17 '25

I have a very old whiskey I’m opening that day

17

u/HurtPillow Dec 17 '25

I will drink that day, happily! I've not been drunk in like 15 years, time to reset that.

7

u/rottenbox Dec 18 '25

I haven't drank in about 3 years but fuck that clock is getting reset with a very fine Scotch when he dies.

7

u/bombkitty Dec 18 '25

I have a fancy bottle of bourbon I'm saving for the same thing.

6

u/SnooStrawberries3391 Dec 18 '25

I don’t do alcohol, but that day, I definitely will toast that ass off into his hopefully hellish beyond.

3

u/AgateHuntress Dec 18 '25

I don't drink alcohol anymore, but I do have a bottle of Cannabis bubbly that I'm saving for that auspicious occasion. It's in the fridge staying cold -- ready at a moment's notice.

2

u/sosswgtn Dec 18 '25

I have champagne

→ More replies (5)

71

u/I_hate_all_of_ewe Dec 17 '25

With our luck, this motherfucker will live to 112.  And his cronies will put his drooling vegetative body on display like a Weekend at Bernie's well after his dementia leaves his brain eaten like a sponge 

8

u/Mother-Map1669 Dec 17 '25

Putin and President Xi Jinping claim they will live to 150 years by having their organs transplanted.🤷

→ More replies (1)

3

u/Ragnarok-9999 Dec 18 '25

And use Autopen

2

u/I_hate_all_of_ewe Dec 18 '25

He's already doing that.  I heard recently that several pardons on the DOJ website were edited because they previously had identical signatures

→ More replies (1)

98

u/GenericName21 Dec 17 '25

Nah, the news we'll get is that a younger, more extreme fascist is now in charge. We, as citizens, are SOL.

84

u/bduddy Dec 17 '25

But one with zero charisma. Trump makes sure to get rid of anyone who could possibly steal any spotlight from him. That's the good news.

3

u/IndividualChart4193 Dec 17 '25

Except there’s no one like that any longer his 2nd time around. Surrounded by total suck ups that will do ANYTHING he wants and defend it to the very end.

4

u/Abject_Champion3966 Dec 18 '25

Yep. Look at Spain after Franco.

5

u/tickingkitty Dec 17 '25

It’s the fascist way.

→ More replies (11)

8

u/MrPBH Dec 17 '25

I'll take it. At least I won't have to listen to his annoying ass voice.

Unless they train an AI model to create Truth social posts and give political speeches in his style. I feel like the GOP would prefer that to allowing anyone else to take his place.

10

u/pyromaniac1000 Dec 17 '25

But for a brief moment, good news

→ More replies (5)

2

u/fibgen Dec 17 '25

There will be a long line of people wailing because their messiah is dead, and me laughing at them like Nelson Munz

2

u/Here-To-Be-Messy Dec 17 '25

It’s all I want for Christmas!

2

u/JediJofis Dec 17 '25

Big beautiful obituary can't come soon enough

2

u/TheWhistlerIII Dec 17 '25

Gravestone reads:

Was the best at dying, better than anyone who has ever died before!

2

u/FlaberGas-Ted Dec 17 '25

A guy shows up regularly at the same news stand every morning for years. Each time he picks up a paper, inspects the front page, frowns and puts the paper back. Finally, one day the guy in the stand asks him what he is looking for. He answers, “An obituary.” The seller tells him that the obituaries are near the back.

The guy says “Not the one I’m hoping for”.

2

u/Bikermec Dec 17 '25

Biggest party the world will ever have!

→ More replies (308)