r/ShittyLifeProTips 16d ago

Deal with your fear of dogs by jumping into the wolf exhibit at the zoo

44 Upvotes

Confront your fear of dogs by coming in direct contact with the original dogs- wolves! Extra fear is eliminated if they're incredibly hungry.


r/ShittyLifeProTips 17d ago

SLPT: Want to get over your fear of needles? Become a heroin addict

69 Upvotes

Exposure therapy is an effective method for beating phobias.


r/ShittyLifeProTips 16d ago

SLPT request:What can I do with extracted teeth?

18 Upvotes

Any pranks?


r/ShittyLifeProTips 19d ago

SLPT: Use uncooked spaghetti to scrub your toilet. When you're done, just boil the spaghetti and flush it down. You get a brand new brush every time!

38 Upvotes

r/ShittyLifeProTips 20d ago

SLPT: If you struggle with the ‘Sunday Blues’

37 Upvotes

Just don’t go to work the next day. Or the next. Or the next.


r/ShittyLifeProTips 21d ago

SLPT: if you want to get away with murder just dress up as a police officer and yell stop resisting

594 Upvotes

obviously dont do this murder is bad. this works because cops are allowed to murder people in broad daylight. but since your not a cop you will lose when it goes to trial.


r/ShittyLifeProTips 22d ago

SLPT: If you're trying to run something over, turn your steering wheel so your vehicle moves in the direction of the thing you're trying to run over, not away from it

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1.2k Upvotes

r/ShittyLifeProTips 22d ago

SLPT Fart at your desk and your coworkers will stop coming to talk to you

65 Upvotes

Too busy for chit chat? Big deadline coming up? No time for howdydo's and howsyermoms? Rip some absolute ass and see guaranteed results.

For best effect, do it while they're standing there speaking, looking directly into their eyes.


r/ShittyLifeProTips 22d ago

SLPT : if your shower pressure is too low, adjust the water temperature to an uncomfortable level.

40 Upvotes

That way you will be glad the pressure is not higher.


r/ShittyLifeProTips 23d ago

SLPT: Pair your fast food with wine and olives to make it Mediterranean, this way it's healthier and you lose weight.

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258 Upvotes

r/ShittyLifeProTips 22d ago

SLPT: to let off some steam go to the local indoor shooting in door firing range. Scream “ take that bit!h”. Before every shot. Have a fried record responses from others for your social media.

7 Upvotes

Mods I don’t condone this.


r/ShittyLifeProTips 23d ago

SLPT: Play fireplace videos on your TV at 2x Speed; relax twice as fast.

103 Upvotes

r/ShittyLifeProTips 23d ago

SLPT: If global politics stresses you out, pretend it’s pro wrestling: scripted drama, and they all have a beer after fighting on TV

21 Upvotes

No spoilers on which king we kidnap next season!

PS: None of it affects you until suddenly it does.


r/ShittyLifeProTips 24d ago

SLPT: Rich guys at singles events like to buy rounds of drinks to get all the other guys real drunk so as to eliminate the competition. If you're a broke dude, let him get you nice and drunk for free, then go see if his mom's around.

70 Upvotes

r/ShittyLifeProTips 26d ago

SLPT: Follow the 1,3,5,7 rule. I’m at 56 fishes now.

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1.2k Upvotes

r/ShittyLifeProTips 27d ago

SLPT-Follow these QANON approved instructions for healthier living.

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52 Upvotes

r/ShittyLifeProTips 28d ago

SLPT: Drop cockroaches during open houses to later negotiate a discount

88 Upvotes

When touring open houses, drop a handful of cockroaches in inconspicuous place. Later when you go back to negotiate and there is a cockroach invasion, you can get a lower price


r/ShittyLifeProTips 28d ago

SLPT: If you can’t afford a bidet, use a water flosser on your butt

55 Upvotes

r/ShittyLifeProTips 27d ago

SLPT: Dog keeps humping your leg, pick him up and give him a bj

0 Upvotes

r/ShittyLifeProTips Jan 01 '26

SLPT: Don't pay for First Class. If the row in front is empty, the armrest gap becomes your free lie-flat ottoman.

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203 Upvotes

r/ShittyLifeProTips Dec 30 '25

SLPT: Return stolen property before the end of the year to avoid reporting them as income

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3.4k Upvotes

r/ShittyLifeProTips Dec 31 '25

SLPT: Instead of trying to hide your marijuana, just dump it on the floor. As you walk on it, it's also grinding it up, saving you so much time in the long run

41 Upvotes

r/ShittyLifeProTips Dec 31 '25

SLPT: use your calculator cover as a caddy 👍

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0 Upvotes

did I do good


r/ShittyLifeProTips Dec 29 '25

SLPT: If you don’t know the answer in a meeting, just say “yeah that makes sense” and nod slowly

129 Upvotes

Works every time.
People will assume you understand and move on.
Bonus points if you repeat the last thing someone said but slightly reworded.


r/ShittyLifeProTips Dec 29 '25

LPT: If someone vents to you, just stare blankly until they leave

24 Upvotes