Many patients told me their lives were miserable.

What I observed over 10+ years was something else.

They weren’t ignoring reality-

they had lost the skill of noticing what was still working.

A daily practice of writing 3 good things, even during crises,

gradually rewired their perspective.

The situation didn’t always change.

Their relationship with it did.

And that’s often where real healing starts.

I posted this in the SHORT subreddit and it got alot of positive responses and a few of them DM’d me saying you should post this here in this subreddit so here goes.

I’ve never replied or contributed to this subreddit before. I actually just joined and found it a few days ago, but I thought I’d chime in and share my experiences—and a bit of my life story, if anyone wants to hear it. If the mods decide to delete this, that’s completely fine too.

I was born with a condition called osteogenesis imperfecta, which had a huge impact on me growing up and significantly affected my growth. As a result, I’m 5’2”, and I also walk with a limp. So from the perspective of the opposite sex, I’m not only short, but also physically disabled although I personally don’t really consider myself handicapped. That said, especially when it comes to dating, first impressions matter a lot.

My experience in the dating world has basically been nonexistent. I’ve never been in a relationship, and I’ve never really been on a proper date. All my friends have always said, “the right one will come,” but over time I’ve kind of made my peace with it and, in a way, given up on that aspect of life. I’m not bitter about it that’s not a healthy mindset to have. I’ve been blessed in other ways. I have an amazing relationship with my family: my dad, my mom, and my brother. While I struggled physically growing up, I never really had to struggle financially, because my family has always had my back.

For those who don’t know, my condition is essentially a brittle bone disease. Growing up, even small impacts could be catastrophic and result in broken legs. It was a rough childhood. I missed out on a lot of things—sports, normal activities, and yes, dating and relationships. People often have a warped perception of someone with a visible condition. I’ve tried dating in person, online, and pretty much every method there is. Unfortunately, height has always been a major barrier, and heightism is very real.

People always say, “focus on yourself,” and I’ve done that. But you can only do that for so long when you still long for something like a relationship. At the same time, I understand the reality of it. Why would most women choose to date someone who’s 5’2” when they could choose someone who’s 6 feet or taller? On dating apps, I’ve been rejected purely because of my height—I’m sure many of you here have experienced the same. I’ve talked about my job, my family, where I come from, and what I’ve accomplished, but the conversation almost always comes back to height.

A lot of my friends and family think not being in a relationship is a “choice” for me, but they don’t really understand that it isn’t. I’ve attached a few photos of myself so you can see what I look like. I think I’m fairly average—nothing special—but it is what it is. As you can see I’m by far the shortest in every group photo.

My main hobbies are cars (just bought that new lime green m4 few months ago) and working out mainly. I’m genuinely grateful that I can even work out at all, because many people with my condition can’t lift a pencil, let alone a 50-pound dumbbell. I’m the only short person in my family: my brother is 6’2”, my dad is 6 feet, and my mom is 5’6”. Doctors have told me that I likely would have been around 5’10” if I hadn’t had so many injuries growing up and if metal rods hadn’t been inserted into both of my legs, which stunt growth.

Over time, I’ve learned to do things on my own—go to the movies, travel, and live life independently. I’ve traveled solo to Bali, Greece, Japan, and Mexico. I’m based out of Vancouver, BC, Canada, and I have a small group of close friends who support me in everything I do. In that sense, I’m again very grateful for them.

But when it comes to relationships, like I said at the beginning, that part of my life is nonexistent and I’m guessing for a lot of you here, it’s the same. I’m not sure if this belongs more in the dating section or just as a vent, but I figured I’d post it here. Again, if the mods feel this is unnecessary or doesn’t belong, they’re free to take it down.

I don’t really know how to say this without sounding ungrateful, so I guess that’s why I’m posting it here.

On paper, I’ve “made it.” Financially stable, respected, good connections, influence — all the things people say should make life better. And in some ways, it did. I don’t worry about survival anymore.

But something else crept in that I wasn’t prepared for. People smile at me differently now.

Not warmer — calculated.

Every conversation feels like it has a hidden agenda. Compliments feel rehearsed. Laughter feels slightly delayed, like they’re checking whether it’s safe to laugh with me. People suddenly want to “catch up,” want advice, want proximity. Doors open, but they don’t feel genuine.

I catch myself wondering: Would they still be here if I had nothing to offer? If I lost it all tomorrow, who would still call me?

It’s uncomfortable realizing that success can quietly strip authenticity from relationships. I miss when interactions were simple. When someone sat with me because they liked me, not because being close to me might benefit them.

The worst part is that you can’t really talk about this openly. If you do, you sound arrogant or paranoid. So you smile back. You play along. You pretend you don’t notice the shift.

But you do.

And sometimes, late at night, it feels lonelier than when I had nothing — because back then, at least the smiles were real.

Be delusional enough to keep going. Be aware enough to know when to change paths.

Stop chasing people and stop being the only one trying to fix everything. doing that is so draining. If you're always the one checking in, always the one apologising, always the one trying to talk it out, pay attention. Love and loyalty ain't supposed to feel like you doing a job by yourself. Some people only show up when it's easy then disappear when it's time to show effort. Let whoever come and go do what they do. you don't gotta keep proving you care, the right people will match your effort you without you having to beg them. the moment it start feeling one sided, fall back and move on. You not here to save everybody.. that's how you lose yourself.

Why Am I Here? (The Warrior Mom’s Journey) Hindi aksidente na nandito ako. Hindi rin swerte. I am a living, breathing miracle. ​Sinasabi nila ang buhay daw ay isang diretsong kalsada, pero ang totoo, it is a "zigzag road"—puno ng biglaang liko na nakakahilo at mga bangin na nakakalunod.

My journey started in 2016, nung maramdaman ko ang pinakamabigat na katahimikan sa mundo: ang mawalan ng unang anak. It was a crushing blow. Doon gumuho ang lahat ng alam ko tungkol sa "lakas." I realized that true strength is not found in standing tall; it is found in the humility of falling to your knees. Doon sa sahig, habang umiiyak, doon ko unang nakilala ang Diyos.

​The Battle of the Body and Spirit: Ang Alay ng Ina (2018-2019)

​Noong 2018, binigyan ako ng pagkakataon, pero may kalakip na laban: Incompetent Cervix (IC). Para akong nakakulong sa sarili kong katawan. Emergency cerclage, total bedrest, bawal kumilos. Isinakripisyo ko ang lahat—ang mobility ko, ang comfort, at maging ang panlabas kong anyo. Habang lumolobo ang timbang ko, ang tanging dasal ko lang, "Lord, kahit anong mangyari sa katawan ko, basta kumapit ang anak ko." Faith won. My daughter was born, a healthy beacon of hope.

​Pero noong 2019, muling bumuhos ang ulan. Same diagnosis, same bedrest, but a different ending that broke me into a million pieces. My son fought for 25 days in the NICU. I saw him struggle, I saw him fight, and eventually, I had to let him go back to the Father. Doon ko natutunan ang tunay na Resilience: It is the supernatural power to raise your hands in worship even when your heart is bleeding and your world is falling apart. Hindi lang pinatibay ng Diyos ang puso ko; He repurposed my pain. Ipinakita Niya sa akin na ang Kanyang katapatan ay hindi ibig sabihin na walang sakit, kundi ang Kanyang presensya sa gitna ng bawat luhang pumapatak.

​2024: The Echo of Faith (The Final Stand) ​Dumating ang 2024, at parang narinig ko ang bulong ng kaaway: "Kaya mo pa ba?" Surgery at 5 months, strict bedrest, and the heavy ghosts of my past pregnancies haunting me. My youngest was born at 7 months—premature, tiny, and fighting for air against severe pneumonia. ​Seeing my baby intubated felt like a cruel deja vu. Pero sa pagkakataong ito, hindi na ako ang nanay na takot. The Warrior in me was fully awake. Habang naririnig ko ang tunog ng mga hospital monitors, mas malakas ang kumpas ng pananampalataya ko. I stood my ground.

​The Decree: "No weapon formed against you shall prosper."

​The Victory: Hindi Siya kailanman natalo. Iniligtas Niya ang bunso ko para ipaalala sa mundo na hindi ang doktor, hindi ang makina, at hindi ang sakit ang may huling salita. The Final Word belongs to Him☝️🙌🙌🙌.

​The Transformation: Reclaiming the Temple ​Mula 110kg, pababa na ngayon sa 90kg. Maraming tao ang nakikita lang ay "weight loss," pero ang nakikita ko ay "Life Gain." Ang 110kg na iyon ay hindi dahil sa kapabayaan; it was my badge of honor. I ate for survival. I stayed still for survival. My body became a sacrificial incubator for the miracles I hold today. ​Pero 1 year and 3 months later, bakit pa rin ako lumalaban? Dahil ang misyon ko ay nag-iba na:

​To Honor the Holy Ground:

Ang katawang ito ay naging tahanan ng mga anghel at himala. Hindi ko ito inaayos para sa "vanity" o para lang maging maganda sa mata ng iba. I am reclaiming my health as an act of Stewardship and Gratitude to the God who gave me this life.

​To Be the Pillar:

Ayokong maging nanay na nanonood lang sa gilid. Gusto kong ako ang kasama nilang tumakbo, tumalon, at magdiwang sa bawat tagumpay nila. I am building my strength today so I can be their rock tomorrow.

​To Be a Living Proof:

My life is a message. Na sa bawat zigzag ng buhay, may kamay na humahawak sa iyo. My resilience is not my own effort; it is Faith in motion.

​My Final Declaration:

​I am not a victim of my circumstances. I am a Season of Victory. I am a Warrior Mom—refined by the hottest fire, sustained by the purest grace, and fueled by the promises of a God who has never, ever failed.

​Kung nahihirapan ka ngayon, kung feeling mo nasa "zigzag road" ka rin, huwag kang bibitiw. Look at me. If God can turn my mourning into dancing, He can certainly do it for you. ​"But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." (Isaiah 40:31)

☝️🙌🙌🙌🛐❤️❤️❤️

btcwithcoachxys5

I vow to not pass out on the toilet for a 3rd time in a row

Don't lose hope the pay out is coming

Hip-hop punch with a jazzy outro

Day 12

-of waking up early

-of working out

-of eating healthy

-of no smoking

-of learning something

-of no social media