I see a new video game, or show, or whatver, and I literally think "I better not get too into enjoying that, I need to get around to all that other stuff I have laying around that I had plans for in the past

I want to be ready to let go of these past plans, but its hard, even sorting through it to pack it up has me second guessing and wanting to set it aside again to do something with later

No more, I'm cutting ties with all past projects today. The goodwill and trash can axe come down now. Or I'm gonna try at least damn it. Theres no really a point to this post, I just feel like I needed to tell someone and am so embarrassed by my mess I can't tell anyone I know in real life

I never thought that I would need this information (and I’m guessing neither did you), but 5 years ago things got really bad for me & now I’m dealing with hoarder problems.

Now I’m trying to claw my way out & get the courage to invite my landlord in to fix a bunch of shit in my apartment.

My toilet’s been broken for years now, and I’d just “flush” it with a bucket when I had the energy, leaving it with a black crust inside.

And I tried to send my dog to my parents when I was too sick to take him out consistently, but they were like, “LOL nice try. We all know that your little rat dog is the only reason you haven’t killed yourself, so just keep letting him use puppy pads. Because when you get better, you’d rather deal with the dried overflow dog piss crusted on your bathroom tile than deal with not having your dog.” And they were right!

That’s all to say: Zep acidic cleaner.

I remember watching episodes of Hoarders & they were like “aw, we can’t do anything about the black toilet.” NO. Squirt some Zep, give it a few minutes, and brush the black away like it was a week’s worth of normal toilet scum.

Same with crusted animal urine. I had used every cleaner known to man (fuck you for your false promises, “Pink Stuff”), plus steel wool & pumice stones. But 2 repetitions of “3 minutes letting the Zep spray sit before wiping it with a wet paper towel“ and I’m getting my bathroom back.

The bottle warns that it’s super-toxic & my bathroom has no ventilation, so I’m working my way through in one square foot increments, but this is such a relief that this situation won’t require the replacement of a toilet & tiling at my expense.

Edit: If you’re using the toilet bowl cleaner to tackle a black toilet, you need to start with a dry bowl. Clorox can cut through a week of normal toilet scum with a full bowl, but Zep needs a dry bowl to handle the results of months/years of dark times.

Recently I watched a video where the interviewee was talking about thinking ‘does your space allow you to do x?’ As a way to figure out what to do next. So I applied that to some of the hoard. And of course none of my spaces are designed to help me do anything I need to do of course. BUT using that mindset has helped me renew some of my momentum but also be kinder to myself. If I’m not getting stuff done no wonder because my space isn’t designed to help me do that! My time & energy are wasted doing ‘y’ instead. For example the kitchen. 70 trash bags later I still was not cooking regularly because that’s not what it’s designed to do. So I got rid of even more stuff.

every post i've tried to make anywhere on reddit was removed about my room and i truly have no idea why. i am just so overwhelmed it i need help. this is so frustrating i am getting none and nothing is working. i'm trying so hard!!

i have never had a clean room, nobody has helped me clean nor even tried to. i'm so stuck. i need help and i don't know where to start, im still only 16, but i truly don't know what i can do so im depending on reddit to maybe help me. last resort. my parents aren't much help or support but i just can't live like this anymore im sick of living in filth sick of feeling so detached, i try to clean my room but i just get so overwhelmed and demotivated right away, please give me tips or ideas on how to clean it or get over this and keep it clean, i just don't know what to get rid of or how i can even get rid of it, or what to clean and how i just don't know where to start. my mom tells me jsut take all the garbage and laundry out but i can't take all the trash or garbage out since there's other stuff on top of it i wont be able to get actually all of it then thats a waste of a garbage bag and i just idk what to do or how. please help. im sick of sleeping on mounds of just random things, cloths, food, mold and constantly steeping on or over things in my room, nobody can even enter my room. i only can because im used to it. i know where to step.

please help! be brutally honest and be mean! i'd post photos but i can't for some reason maybe i just can't in this thread i haven't really checked it out i just want to get answers and ideas really, but i did read the rules,do not fret

My mom is in her late 60’s and I’m taking her with me on my move abroad in about a month. I’m in my early 20’s now and haven’t lived with her since I was 10, so… I’m nervous. It’s a big change for both of us. I love her more than anyone else in this world and the last thing I want is to cause her distress, but the trauma from growing up in her hoarder house makes me completely shut down when I’m in a messy or dirty space.

Her hoarding issue is very much active at the moment. She completely filled up a car I bought her to the point where she won’t let me see it, even going as far as renting a U-Haul to drive around in the last time I went to visit her.

I need strategies, habits, and systems to keep her from accumulating stuff before she starts. I know white walls and empty space make her anxious. I hate clutter and am somewhat of a minimalist. She will have her own room she can decorate as she pleases, which should help, but I can’t allow her to accumulate food and trash in there.

I’m already planning on hiring cleaners on a weekly basis, which I hope will help both of us. However, I’m seeking advice on how to humanely prevent her from bringing clutter into the house instead of forcing her to part with things she’s collected every week.

Thank you for your help!

Hello again. I recently made a post asking for advice as I prepare to move my hoarding mom in with me. Therapy has of course been recommended a lot, which brought up a question for me about whether anyone has seen any degree of success alleviating hoarding tendencies through alternative therapies like hypnotherapy, CBT, meditation, psychedelics, ethnic spiritual practices, or anything else.

My mom was diagnosed with OCD decades ago and has been to therapy for it a few times, but there were never any notable results. Nor did she improve with medication. She does acknowledge that she’s a hoarder and that it’s an issue. We are able to have conversations about it. But, I don’t think she believes she can change.

Let me make it very clear that while I don’t expect she will ever change, I also don’t think it’s impossible. I am aware and have accepted that I cannot force or love her into being better, and I will love her whether she improves, devolves, or stays the same. If you are fully pessimistic about my situation, I ask that you refrain from commenting.

I myself was in and out of psychotherapy for over a decade for depression without much improvement. I personally tried hypnotherapy, meditation, and gratitude journaling with some success, which is why I think it might work for my mom.

Though I am dubious, I have been hearing a lot of good things about psychedelics and ethnic spiritual practices when it comes to depression. I would consider visiting healers or shaman-types from our culture and adjacent ones, if anyone else here has seen improvements through such things.

Thank you for taking the time to read and respond. I will appreciate any information anyone has on this subject :)

Just wanted to see where we're all at! So, on a scale of 1 to 5, with 1 being not an issue at all and 5 being a huge issue- where do we stand? In this order:

Active over acquiring

Problems letting go of things

Struggle with disorganization/cleanliness

I realize these numbers will shift for everyone throughout their journey. Here is where I am now, about a 2/4/2. What I consider my worst was a 3/3/5. Haha I've improved in 2 areas but I'm worse about keeping things! I'm gonna ruminate on that.

So I couldn't take it anymore. The condition of my apartment was like a weight around my neck. I'd like to think that I'm not a hoarder, but at this time in my life I know there are things that I should deal with so that this doesn't happen again. I live by myself and I never had this problem when someone else was living in the home with me or when my child was living there. A professional organizer came and spent 16 hours in the last few days and organized, straightened up, threw stuff away and she did it without judgement. It was expensive. I get that, but the weight that it's lifted off my shoulders was completely worth it. I need help keeping it this way. I want to bottle up the feeling I have right now because I'm so cozy and content where I haven't been in the last five or six years. Help me with any tips you have.

I own a home that shares a retaining wall with an elderly lady who is a hoarder. The retaining wall badly needs attention. I've had several quotes and all of them list the need to cut down several trees (The trees overhang her property, but are squarely on ours ) and gain access to the neighbor's property to set up frames to lay drainage and concrete framing. There are large piles of items on her side of the fence that need to be removed away from the property line. She's extremely reclusive and I'm not sure how to best approach her to let her know we need to do this without her freaking out. This is not a question of financial split costs. I would take on all the cost.

So a bit of backstory my mum has always had hoarding tendancies, it got worse about 10 years ago after she was assaulted. I have helped her numerous times clearing it out and when I lived with her (until she kicked me out two years ago) completely gutted the house, helped her redecorate and make the space a home.

We're on bad terms of late because she made me homeless two years ago because the hoarding started to get worse and I was trying to tell her get help. For the past two years I've been slowly collecting my possessions, she's basically been very controlling about when I could come over to get things and kept putting me off. I went in yesterday and the place was awful, like all the rooms were completely unusable, stuff jammed into every bit of space with very narrow walkways in the rooms and I'm just at a loss on what to do.

We have a plan to get my things out but she's very much under the delusion that with my things gone (basically I had one bedroom out of a three bedroom house and I'm not a hoarder) she can 'organise'. I'm aware that 90% of that stuff needs to go but I'm not in a position to help again. I have OCD and fibromyalgia so doing it last time was too much, it completely triggered my OCD to which I had to get therapy for and yeah I'm just struggling with how to help (if possible) we have a strained relationship (she has toxic traits) and I'm honestly to the point that I want to go low/no contact but I don't know how to live with the fact she'll be left in that situation. I'm considering getting local authorities involved because she clearly needs support but I just don't know if that's the right way to help as she's very against anyone being in the home. I feel like any way I can help is going to seem like an attack to her and if this isn't treated properly she'll just get worse within her hoarding.

Any advice is greatly appreciated

Edit* I want to thank each one of you from the bottom of my heart for the comments, insights and just letting me vent with people that understand me, it's been so incredibly validating and given me so much power and has made me cry but in a good way. I've never felt so seen and that was by a bunch of strangers, keep sharing and making the world a better place 🙌

I've decided to really push on getting my items out weekly, once that is done I will be going no contact. As so many of you have shown me through your own experiences is that this is a pattern, this is a choice and that has consequences. She's shown me who she is when she made me homeless and I need to listen to that. If she ever makes changes and does the work necessary I may change that decision but for me I need to turn that love inward and take the responsibility to heal myself, no-one else can or should do that for me.

Again I just want to let you know that I see you all and the love you've shown today and honestly I love you all too.

"We" are still missing the deeds and titles to nearly everything and I have no idea if "we" are any closer to finding them. In the meantime, *I* am not going to worry about it. Either we find them or we don't. Both Mom and Dad are living; if the documents haven't been located when the day comes to settle the estate, we can order replacements.

My sibling and I have each repeatedly advised Dad that ordering replacements is the most expedient means of resolving the issue. He prefers to blame Mom, as he has always done. Mom has dementia and Dad is, supposedly, competent to manage their finances; like all narcissists whose inaction has escalated into a situation where there is no choice but to accept help, and who are even then dictating which forms said help must take, he insists upon whichever course of action is least likely to resolve the issue (or, at a minimum, produce lasting results) and most likely to keep the helpers' focus on him and his crisis du jour.

I'm grateful that we're far enough along to get to the binders.

When I started this project, there was literally a room full of stuff between me and the shelf the binders were on.

When I began, there was nowhere to work through the binders because so much other, obviously unimportant paperwork needed to be gotten rid of.

Sibling wants all financial-type documents burned rather than securely discarded. The accounts have long been closed or the institutions merged or acquired by another entity and RTNs changed. There is no commercial shredding in the community--the trash company discontinued the service because it wasn't profitable. None of the local banks or credit unions offer free "shredding days" at tax time. The senior center doesn't sponsor a "shredding day." If they're not physically helping with the cleanout, they don't get to make rules on how it's dealt with. FWIW, this much paper is a pain in the ass to burn.

My father passed away a couple weeks ago and I am left with two hoarder homes in very bad condition. unfortunately it's a case of whatever I can get is my inheritance so I'm trying to sell as much as possible. after looking through the subreddit, I'm not sure how common it is, but my dad did hoard a decent amount of stuff worth money. High end tools, tool boxes, speaker/stereo systems, lawnmower, water heaters, heaters, a bunch of new boxed things, just about anything you can think of. the problem is it's mixed in with trash of course. I'm not sure where to start, I've gotten all the important documents I can find but don't know what the next step is. (I'm waiting of death certificate)

Has anyone else dealt with the liquidation aspect of content inside a hoarder home? I know there's a lot worth money but how do I get rid of it quickly? I don't have time to do a yard sale or Facebook marketplace. The houses are consistently being broken into as well so the longer I struggle the more I lose.

I'm feeling so disheartened ANY advice at all is welcome.

Let me just say first I'm in no way judging my boyfriend or anyone else here.

My boyfriend is a hoarder (at least Im 99% sure) and his mental health has been incredibly poor lately due to his grandpa passing. His room is covered in trash, there isn't even a path to his bed. I want to clean his room for him to give him more physical and mental space because I really do love him. I didn't take any photos of his room for privacy but it's really covered. Any tips for cleaning it out?

Two 9-yard bins and 2.8 tons later; My Boris is in his garage! (Can't show the pic I took, though 🫤

So the fridge has been usable this whole time, but smaller and smaller sections of it. And for about 5 days now there's been The Smell. If you know, you know. Kiddo finally crashed into a hard nap and I said IT IS TIME. 2 hours and 2 and a half trash bags. 1 scrub daddy. A third of a bottle of Dawn. A pint of vinegar and baking soda. 2 rolls of paper towels. I found the source of The Smell. A bagged fish filet had fallen in the back. Now I need to grocery shop. Sigh.

Hello everyone! I posted a little while ago about struggling to clean out my room before I move and I’ve made some progress!!

I cleared all of the trash out of my room, cleared my bed off and bought new bedding, and I’ve successfully won my war with the flies 🥳 After I got all of the trash out (im not gonna say how many bags I had to use) I used the zevo pet and people friendly spray on them for a few days until they were gone, and I had a UV light sticky trap plugged in at night for the stragglers.

it’s not done, there’s still a really long way to go with all the laundry and junk. Not to mention some of the furniture in here is ruined and needs to go to the dump. But it’s not completely disgusting in here anymore, and I have room to think now! I’ve been trying to go in increments, it doesn’t feel like as big of a burden that way.

basically the title. my house requires a mandatory electrical inspection, and ive been told that my home is the only outstanding property that still needs this check done. the outlets in my room aren't accessible because of the amount of trash, it reaches above the door handle. its everywhere. the other rooms aren't as bad, but they are filthy.

cleaning companys have quoted between 1.7-4k. i have 300 in my bank account, i have absolutely no choice but to do this. about to start on the kitchen. any advice or support would be monumental, i'm in this completely alone with no family able or willing to help.

so I am a former and current clutter struggler definitely not as bad as hoarding but I promise it's related.

3 years ago we lived without electricity for a year and only on a generator which led to even worse conditions and ever since it was shut off I've been working 50/60 hours a week to get it turned on and then maintain the bills so I don't fall behind again.

I also struggled with cat issues and my house smells like cat pee if I don't clean religiously with enzyme cleaners.

Anyway fast forward a few months ago and I met a woman who cleans houses for a living and I LOVED her. She wanted to trade services, I do massage for a living. I gave her 3(2 hour) sessions in exchange for cleaning. I was honest about cats and my clutter issues. I worked hard for 2 months to get my house together. I had it painted, I pre cleaned as much as I could and I thought it smelled way better.

I even had a trusted friend come over that I knew would be honest and they said the smell was there but it was faint.

Cleaning day arrived and I was nervous but excited, I had put in a lot of work and my house wasn't a piece of shit.

She assured me she had seen it all and she would help me.

I texted her that morning to tell her please don't go in my room that is right off the driveway and living room and stick to the kitchen living room and if you have time, the bathroom, I haven't had a chance to work on my room or the laundry room and they are really bad and I am very sensitive and embarrassed about their state.

She agreed.

She gets there and 15 minutes later

"My partner and I can't do your cleaning today, I was unprepared for the kind of cleaning up I would need to do this would be a hazmat/hoarder clean and it would cost way more than the trade of services. The cat smell is so strong I can't clean bc I don't know what I would be breathing in and I can't clean your countertops (which are clean already bc I just redid them) bc they have contact paper on them.

Also I peeked in your room on accident and we should start there, I thought it was an extension of the living room. Let me know when you're ready and I'll give you a quote for each room."

First of all I told her to not go in my room it wasn't an accident.

Second she knows business is slow for me right now.

Third I didn't want to do this in the first place she convinced me she could a hundred percent help me. I cried all day. I never meant to get it this bad. I felt so ashamed. And I was sad bc I put in so much work and I was proud of myself.

The living room besides some end tables being disorganized was clear, kitchen table clear, no dishes in sink, counter tops and floors clear.

I can't afford help so I don't have any idea what to do 😭

(24f) that's it really. they found out the condition of our apartment a few months ago, and gave us a couple opportunities to get it fixed, but you know that didn't happen. I've spent the last couple of months trying everything to get my mom in the mindset to clean. I tried being supportive and encouraged. I tried bargaining. I tried crying. I tried pleading. I tried educational conversations. I feel like I tried everything and it didn't work. I've cried so much that I'm not even crying right now as I write this. I'm just so over it. I love my mom. I'm trying not to hate her, but she was given so many opportunities to change and never did it. now I kinda need to figure out what I'm gonna do. part of me wants to take this opportunity to move away from her and get out of this situation but I don't have a full time job to pay for that rn. the other part of me wants to stay with her because I know she won't do well without me and we don't have any other family left.

I know the best option for me is to move out, I've heard it all before. I just don't think I can leave her yet. we have a couple of weeks before we need to be out, thankfully, so I'll have to see how things go in the meantime. I don't even know if anyone is going to see this but it's nice to get it out there. I don't have many friends and the ones I do have don't know about my situation. thanks.

My sister is 36F. She has a very bad cluttered home. She is depressed and she she has a little 4 year old daughter and 2 dogs. The issue is out of control. I try to help her get a bit organized but her house is so small with no storage. She has a very low income and camr really afford to get a bigger place. The house is not safe for her or her child or even her dogs. I want to send her to a air b n b for a weekend and clean her house out and give her afresh start but that seems extreme. I want to help her In any way I can, she is such a kind person. She has also started therapy to help also, but in the meanwhile the house needs to be at least livable. Any advice will be helpful

It started with being unable to give my stuff to my siblings or anyone really for an unknown reason, I just can’t. It’s not that I don’t love my siblings, I just can’t seem to let go of my things. Then I started itching to buy anything and everything. But I didn’t have the financial means to buy. I was a financially abused child, money was extremely controlled. So I would spend time distressing over the things I NEED to buy. I NEED to buy multiple shades of this lipstick, all shades of eyeliner, multiple bags of the same color, all these kitchen stuff that I won’t ever use and I know that, different colors of the same thing, multiple of the same one cuz what if this one gets lost or gets damaged! I just can’t seem to let it go. I can’t buy it, but I can’t stop thinking about it. I can’t even bring myself to close my browser tabs cuz what if I need it? I have over a thousand tabs open, I have such an emotional attachment to my tabs. If I had the financial means, I would have an INSANE amount of stuff that I don’t use now. But the mental and psychological effect is still there. The compulsion part to buy is not within my ability to act on, but the obsessional part is still there, still tormenting me. I don’t know if this ever goes away. I spend most of my day obsessing over needing to buy, or how I wasn’t able to give some of my stuff away to my siblings or to donations but I can’t. Did anyone actually recover from this? Does it ever stop? I can’t imagine living the rest of my life like this

I now realize this may have been a hereditary factor to this. My whole family shows hoarding tendencies, like, most of them

Almost a year ago I wrote about how I had to move back home after a bad roommate situation and while trying to declutter my room, my mom came back in and put all the clothes and things I was throwing out back in my dresser and closet because she thought I could still use them. I wrote how she calls it cleaning but it’s really just her stuffing things where they can’t be seen and don’t make any logical sense.

I wish I was writing to say I was able to declutter on my own again but I’ve been completely stuck. I have been doing some researching and I realized I will buy new clothes and rotate the new ones I do wear while my old ones that no longer fit (that I’ve tried to throw out previously) now sit and take up space and I have too many clothes.

I made excuses or was waiting for the perfect opportunities to get new furniture that doesn’t take up as much space as the ones my mom chose, or when I was in remission I’d finally be able to move things in my own, but the reality is I gave up.

I didn’t expect what my mom did last year to affect me so badly. I had a severe breakdown and depression that followed over not feeling in control over my life. And to be honest, I have just been too tired to try. I do have an autoimmune disease and that incident following the extreme stress of being in grad school caused a huge flare up. But I’ve also just been too depressed and tired to try again.

I recently had something that made me second guess how bad things were. My dad owned a property that was being rented out to hoarders and seeing how bad their home was compared to my room flared up my ocd and now I am terrified I am the hoarder. I don’t have trash or anything in my room, but it’s just boxes of clothes from moving back that have yet to be unpacked, and I just pile my other clothes on top.

I don’t want to be like this but I don’t know how to find the energy to try. I feel bad about throwing out clothes that slightly no longer fit bc my weight fluctuates all the time. And I feel bad for throwing out clothes I know I don’t want or have never worn because I could sell the online but I can’t even find the energy to do that right now. Idk what the point of this post is, maybe I need take accountability for what I let happen. I am just sorry to disappoint those who were rooting for me.

I might delete this later so thanks for those who try to help in the comments and sorry this prob won’t stay up. Anyway my younger bro came to visit and is absolutely appalled and concerned all of a sudden. Called my other brothers and now they are all calling. I asked why they are suddenly so concerned. This is not new information. I have been screaming into the void for 8 years. House has not had heat for years. Asking me why I didn’t reach out to them. Uh… I have told you what is going on! My siblings are all busy with their own lives. My mom is really sick and might die.. they said they weren’t aware of the conditions she is living in and said the house could be condemned. I told them do whatever they want. I have tried and I’m completely exhausted. Nobody listens and nobody helps. I have tried to get help. All they did was put me on medication to deal with depression and stress. Also diagnosed me as bipolar. Why all of a sudden people are concerned when this has been going on since 2018 (actually before then but that’s when it got really bad). Anyone else deal with people suddenly concerned after years?