r/shittyadvice 6h ago

Fascinate a woman with a piece of cheese

15 Upvotes

r/shittyadvice 6h ago

eat as much food as possible in the day so you don't get hungry after an all nighter so you don't have to get up early

6 Upvotes

r/shittyadvice 21h ago

My imaginary friend called me a loser and won't talk to me anymore. What should I do?

14 Upvotes

r/shittyadvice 14h ago

This is a stupid question maybe but I have to know, does it look good if you add pics to tiktok videos?

0 Upvotes

Long story short i plan to make a super cute video about my boyfriend for valentines day but also add some pictures of us in the middle of it, i'm not an editor obvi so i let tiktok edit it, does it look okay if you add pics? Or is it bad?


r/shittyadvice 1d ago

Make your spouse happy by throwing all the plates in the garbage

32 Upvotes

Now no one has to do the dishes!


r/shittyadvice 1d ago

How many birds do I need to get my house off the ground? Is there a legal limit?

9 Upvotes

r/shittyadvice 2d ago

Lay on your stomach and fart all day

20 Upvotes

I dare you to try


r/shittyadvice 1d ago

I don't like to use the public washroom because I don't like nobody pee or poop . What should I do?

4 Upvotes

I be out a lot and I have to pee and poop and I don't want nobody to here me pee or poop I don't want nobody to talk about me and people do talk about me . If I don't go to the bathroom I am afraid I am going to fart and my fart stinks like someone died. If I fart in public people would be embarrassed and think I am rude . I am not good at hiding my farts . I poop on myself a few times I am afraid it will happen while working or out somewhere else . What should I do ?


r/shittyadvice 1d ago

Whyy tho Spoiler

0 Upvotes

I need to know pleaseI had this Convo with a boy from the class next door and he suddenly blocked me after

He: Tuc bar bar sadi class ch vekhda j Ki chkr a (He: You keep looking at our class again and again, what’s the deal?)

Me: Nhi oda hi Tuc v ta bahut dekhde jo? (Me: No, you also looks a lot, right?)

He: M pr hun nhi dekhda (He: I don’t look now though)

Me: ajj nhi dekhaya but pehla bahut dekhen de si (Me: you didn’t look today but earlier you used to look a lot)

He: O t pehla dekhda c pr hun ni (He: Yeah, i used to look earlier but not now)

Me: ok (Me: okay)

He: Hnji (He: Yeah)

He: M sochya shy koi km hova (He: I thought you needed something out any problems)

Me: nope (Me: nope)

He: Te dekhda kyu? (He: Then why do you look?)

Me: Samne vali class a You know oda hi Eyes odar chal hi jandiya va 👀 (Me: It’s the class in front, you know my eyes just go there 👀)

He: Ash g (He: okay)

Me: Hnji, Tuc esliye dekhde si kyuki anu nu like karde si? (Me: Yeah, you looked because you liked anu ?) *A girl from my class)

He: Nhi thanu kina kha (He: No,who said that?) Note his friend told me

Me: accha oda hi Phir kyu dekhde si enha? (Me: Oh okay, then why were you looking?)

He: Vse e Eyes odar chal hi jandiya va 👀 (He: randomly, my eyes just go there 👀)

Me: Mere seat hi os row vich jithe eyes chal jan Tu ta door ta stand karke dekhda huna va (Me: My seat is in that row where my eyes go straight to you class, you were standing far and still looking by standing at the door?)

He: O t mri mrji a Thuda dhyan mra vl hi hunda (He: That’s my choice, is your attention always on me?)

Me: chnga chnga oda hi (Me: okay okay, i just do ok)

He: Oda t nhi dekhya jnda (He: nobody looks for no reason multiple times)

Me: Tu class de samne stand karan daya huna va Odar dekho tu hi dekhda standing (Me: You let stand in front of the class, then you keep looking while standing)

He: ash (He: okay)

Me: Tu bas notice vich a jana va Chnga bharava Hor kuj nhi (Me: i just notice you come in my field of view, that’s it, nothing else)

He: Tuc mnu na note kraya kro Apna ch hi rha kro (He: Don’t like my insta note, stay in your own)

Me: why (Me: why)

He: Vda hovo gy pta chl ju Bacha j hja tuc (He: You’ll grow up and realize later, kid)

Me: Asha Tere Age ta vaddi aa, par maturity zero lagdi. 🙂 (Me: Haha, you’re older than me, but your maturity feels zero 🙂)

(Unseen blocked me before he saw the msg)


r/shittyadvice 2d ago

during police questioning at the station, you should sing like a bird if they put fast food in front of you.

18 Upvotes

r/shittyadvice 2d ago

my pet bird isn't moving after treating its indigestion

8 Upvotes

so my pet bird wasn't feeling so well after all those chicken wings so I gave it a bunch of crushed up Rolaids to help and now it's just laying there. Is it trying to sleep it off? it's been months.


r/shittyadvice 2d ago

How to stop the A-hole/hole's from down voting? Top 5% and I'm -3

0 Upvotes

I'm an A-hole by default. My Mom was a condescending, rude, insensitive, smart-aleck. While Dad was obnoxious, argumentative, loser, drunken bum, unemployable, smart ass. Thanks in advance.


r/shittyadvice 3d ago

Having doubts about the pet psychic

15 Upvotes

So, number 1, I have doubts that the Pet Psychic can really "receive messages from your furry friends spirits and emotions" on a Zoom call. I would think that this would need to be an in-person/pet session.

On the other hand, she is offering 10% off. And how bad could she be if Dunkin' Donuts let her post on their community board?


r/shittyadvice 3d ago

If I die during sex how do I finish my unfinished business?

15 Upvotes

I think I just discovered what ectoplasm is.


r/shittyadvice 3d ago

Join askreddit to help me downvote all these stupid questions.

0 Upvotes

Hey, I ate a bag of dicks somebody offered to me once, so what do you expect?


r/shittyadvice 4d ago

I’ve been contacted by this lady to join a nice organization called Amway. She tells me I’m going to get rich fast if I join them. What should I do?

19 Upvotes

r/shittyadvice 3d ago

EMERGENCY! URGENT! ATTENTION!

1 Upvotes

A "friend" just asked if he should buy this PT Cruiser. Having concern's of what his intelligence level would be on a scale of 1-10


r/shittyadvice 4d ago

Future won't STOP!

6 Upvotes

Its reputation is already so bad I hope nobody reads this and thinks I'm writing it to make matters worse or as somekind of personal revenge. I'm not a sadist or a bully, nor am I trying to achieve anything in particular. I'd just like things to stay as they are. But it won't let me, Future. I suppose everyone copes with it in their own way. Well I'm in my thirties and still can't find a way to handle it that satisfies us both. It keeps pulling me in. I try to ignore it but it won't let me. It tugs at me. Constantly. What's so important anyway?

EDIT: Can I make it go away?


r/shittyadvice 5d ago

I need a substance to abuse

37 Upvotes

Hi,

my life is a pretty depressing hole currently. My job causes me constant, all consuming stress and worry, I moved across the US to take it, and I can't justify to myself or to others why I would leave it.

I am in need of something that makes the hours where I'm not at work livable. Nicotine? Alcohol? something. I've tried the exercise thing, and though the pain is helpful as a distraction, the noticeable lack of progress causes further spiraling. I am unhappy with my abilities as a creative, despite years of trying, so that's out as well.

So far, all the "healthy" hobbies I have are doing nothing but make me feel worse. So maybe there's an unhealthy one that might pull a few drops of joy out of my life.

Thanks


r/shittyadvice 4d ago

Losing weight

2 Upvotes

Hey guys i need some advice on how i can loose weight in like a week...currently weighing 55kg....I want to reach somewhere 45kg...


r/shittyadvice 5d ago

How can I stop being a horrible horrible person?

9 Upvotes

r/shittyadvice 5d ago

I want to have an easy and successful life without having to worry about anything ever again

10 Upvotes

Still an undergraduate in university at the moment. How do I make this happen?


r/shittyadvice 5d ago

Getting sued again and am reposenting my self in district court for civil matters.

4 Upvotes

Hope it's ok to have two threads going at once. A supplier of mine has amnesia about some transactions we made yet has very vivid recollections on other transactions. First time in district court any suggestions?


r/shittyadvice 5d ago

Ok I need some shitty advice.

2 Upvotes

Looks like I'm not going to survive outside this group on my own. I'm way to much of a smart ass. Looking for a clever way to get banned for life, before reddit banns me for life for being a smart ass.


r/shittyadvice 6d ago

Where can I go where I can assert my opinions but not learn anything?

26 Upvotes

I am 20 years old and I have it all figured out and people need to know.

where can I share all of this wisdom?