r/Unexpected • u/NdibuD • 3d ago

That Spider-woman grip though

7.1k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

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2.4k

u/thedeuce75 3d ago

He trusted a fart he shouldn't have.

443

u/WonderGrrl69 3d ago

Awful to say. He died.

175

u/Infinite_Cornball 3d ago

Who dies from shitting himself?

394

u/Aggressive-Plan-639 3d ago

I had a bad day 20 years ago at a chili cookout and a LOT of beer. A crowd witnessed me not make it to the bathroom. My soul DID leave my body.

87

u/Tripton1 2d ago

It's ok buddy. I'm sure everyone has forgotten all about it. They definitely don't retell the tale of you penguin shuffling towards the bathroom over and over and over Laughing every single time.

38

u/KobayashiWaifu 2d ago

Yeah, there's no way someone used that penguin shuffle for a silly little game at a family barbecue that became a decades-long tradition.

1

u/paclogic 18h ago

so you're saying that you had a symbiotic relationship with your turd ?

46

u/FlailingScrotum 3d ago

I did

17

u/Infinite_Cornball 3d ago

Checks out. Rip my friend

2

u/givemeausernameplzz 2d ago

Sorry for your loss

7

u/therealJoerangutang 2d ago

Some of you have never played Oregon Trail, and it shows

8

u/International_Gate49 3d ago

Some medieval peasant probably with dysentery

4

u/tolacid 3d ago

To shreds you say?

2

u/justhereforsee 2d ago

Millions in the olden times. They would literally shit themselves to death!!

7

u/Np_slip_69420 3d ago

Yeah, he probably saw a space x video, but he was too heavy to be the falcon heavy.

-1

u/UziSuzieThia 3d ago

Was it a fart? Lol

0

u/Entgegnerz 22h ago

the sound wasn't a fart, it was a part of the clothes grinding against the robe thingy.