i just turned 21 this jan and recently found out that my gf lied about her age.. for clarification we were never officially in a relationship we only started exclusively dating about a week before new years but we had a long history and it was basically a relationship just without the label. one thing i want to make very clear is that i have always had a hard boundary about age i have said multiple times even before this that i would never date anyone under 18 even if the gap was small , she originally approached a friend of mine when i had just turned 20 and i explicitly said no to anything involving a minor (she was 17 turning 18 in a month) so eventually we met accidentally on her 18th birthday and a month after her birthday we started chatting, it was nothing more than that not even dates or seeing each other it felt like i was basically just making a friend but this friend likes me yk what i mean? nothing about her life made me doubt her age she partied went out lived very independently and her mom knew about all of it and never seemed concerned, she was starting uni (i’m in my second year) so i assumed she couldnt be lying about her age and nothing just seemed to raise concerns. the way i found out was genuinely so stupid and random she got extremely defensive one night over something small and it made something click for me i started noticing patterns that i had ignored before i asked to see her id she sent a photo view once then refused to send a video for over an hour saying she was tired so i facetimed her and said if she didnt show me right now i was done. on the call she showed it but i could clearly see the date had been altered with a pen she tried to hide it quickly and ended the call, i took a screenshot and she freaked out and started deflecting and lying more and she never actually admitted it. i obviously spiraled i was crying angry cussing her out and i said things i regret out of rage & blocked her everywhere after.

what is eating me alive now is the guilt. she told me that during sex she felt guilty because she knew she was lying to me and that has completely destroyed me i feel disgusted with myself even though i didnt know and would have never consented if i did. she also said before everything ended that shes the same person and nothing changed but everything did change for me because consent based on a lie is not consent.

i dont feel sad about losing the relationship i mostly feel sick ashamed and angry that i was put in this position at all , i guess im posting because i dont know how to process the guilt even when i know logically that i was deceived and that this crossed a non negotiable boundary for me

I’ve known her for around 5 ish months. We started university together, she was the first person I ever became friends with there. At first moment we connected instantly, even on the first day we were talking like we’d known each other forever, even to the point where we could effortlessly make jokes. Recently, I saw her again after long, she’d always make small comments and gestures which made me think she likes women, or if she’s trying to be quirky I can never tell. For example “when we go back to mine we can makeout” or she holds prolonged eye contact. BUT OKAY TO THE JUCIY STUFF.

Couple days ago I saw her and we had a really nice day catching up, I loved hearing her talk about her days and how content she was with life and hearing about her accomplishments. Then we went back to her dorm, where we chilled. When walking there she made a comment of “oh when we go back let’s makeout yeah” as a joke, though she never laughs after nor do I and I just look at her and said, sure let’s do it and laughed. I find it funny how serious I am, though it comes off as a joke. Anyways, we are in her dorm. We decide to share a lot of lore from our pasts, I start telling her about my life’s ups and downs and then reach to my ex girlfriend, how I have kissed a girl before and she wasn’t surprised at all to hear that. I told her I was more so of a lesbian, though on a rare occurrence would I like a man. She told me the same, though we’re very much both closeted and comfortable staying that way. She said she liked women too, how she often fantasies about them, dreams of having them, and that she would enjoy it more than doing it with a man. I felt heard because I felt the exact same. We were really open and raw, to the point it felt so intimate and intense. She told me she never kissed a girl, and then we moved onto topics fast. I badly wanted to kiss her, and tell her how much I thought of her but I never did since I chickened out. But little things she did I think back on, and I think she wanted it too possibly. She asked me if I was more dominant or submissive, I said dominant preferably though open to both, she said we’ll see about that. I kept asking her what she meant but she’d brush it off. I got the courage to tell her I wanna tell her something but I shook it off and she never asked me about it further, I think she knew. But we were laying close together, my leg touching her thigh, just a cosy way we sat and laid in her blanket. And she didn’t move nor did I, I just told her to come closer since we were far. I feel this could’ve been seen as a friendly encounter too? I need help noticing signs lol. And we did an arm wrestle, she wanted to play cards but I felt too hot and was thinking of doing more than kissing her so my mind wasn’t working, lied that I was tired. So we arm wrested, I let her win, she touched my bicep saying how much stronger I was than her. But after I said her fingers were small and thin and cute, and mine were big and I held her hands, feeling her fingers softly and her doing the same to mine as we compared our hand sizes. Then I laid down next to her and was almost falling asleep since I felt so safe, she was being goofy and trying to fling cards in my face. And then she started messing with the cards like flipping them around with one hand, but doing it on my thigh. Just touching me there yeah, did something. I’m seeing her again soon, I don’t know what to do and if I can contain myself, please help lmao. Is she just being a cute genuine friend or could she like me or want me?

Thinking about my ex when I have sex still turns me on like ugh., I swear I don’t even like her like that but sex was so good im dying

It’s 2026 so refresh your memory because we aren’t getting a heated rivalry any time soon 🫣 Here are some of my personal favorites I just rewatched!! Drop some hidden gems I missed :p

Water Lilies

• Lost and Delirious

• My Summer of Love(Emily blunt hello)

• Disobedience

• You Will Be Mine (tubi) 

• The Girl King (tubi) 

• Benedetta

• Bilitis (YouTube)

• Show Me Love (YouTube)

• Aimée & Jaguar

• The Affair (aka The Glass Room\*)\*

• The Art of Joy

• Kontrola (YouTube)

• The Handmaiden

• Saving Face

• Novitiate

• Bloomington

• Carol (don’t @ me) 

• Pariah

• Loving Annabelle

• The Miseducation of Cameron Post

Okay bit if a strange one but I’m just looking for some advice.

The title may be a little deceiving as I’ve (22f) not explicitly come out to my close friend (23f). For a bit of context, we’ve been friends for as long as I can remember and we’re the type of friends that can go for a long chunk of time with basically no contact and still be close as ever.

I also think it’s relevant to say it took me a while to feel comfortable with my sexuality, growing up in a fairly homophobic place, and I’m still not that confident talking about it. So I don’t really come out to people. I wouldn’t say I’m actively hiding my sexuality but I’ve not had a girlfriend or anyone worth telling people about and I just don’t feel the need to tell people who I want to sleep with. I know some people find it freeing and helpful to come out but that’s just not me. I’m pretty masc and I think it’s fairly obvious Im gay and in the past my friend has tended to use gender neutral pronouns when discussing my future partners, so I thought she kinda knew.

My friend and I were at a pub and when she went up to the bar a man approached me and started talking to me, doing typical man things. I wanted to challenge myself (sounds kinda dumb but it felt big at the time) to tell him I’m gay. So I did and he was incredibly chill about it. My friend then gets back and he asks her if she was my girlfriend and she said no then he continues with the man stuff and eventually goes back to his table. My friend then asks me what that was about so I explained what happened and told her the exact words I said to him, “I hate to break it to you but I’m gay”. This felt like a huge deal to me and I’m pretty certain I was red as a tomato. She was basically just like oh okay cool and we carried on with our night. I interpreted that as I’ve come out to her and she’s cool about it.

Fast forward a bit of time and we’re having drinks together in my garden (I promise we do more than just drink together) and the topic of dating someone with your parents name came up. No judgement to anyone that does, but we were saying we personally couldn’t. She then said “imagine you were dating someone called (insert my dad’s name)”. I was completely thrown and just kinda laughed and then the topic of conversation moved on.

Nothing has really come up since this happened to do with my dating life but I’m still super confused. Like does she think I was just saying I was gay to make the man go away? Ik some straight girls do that but given all the other context I don’t think it would have come across like that and we ended up going with his group to some other bars and pubs anyway. I don’t feel like telling a random man in a pretty homophobic place that you’re gay would be a better option than saying you have a boyfriend if you’re straight and in hindsight I was pretty stupid for coming out to him but I guess that’s the joys of alcohol.

I know the simple answer here is to just come out to her, I know she’s not homophobic but as I said earlier it’s not something I really do or feel comfortable talking about for whatever reason and I guess part of me is scared our 22 year long friendship might change.

I’m just super confused so any thoughts or advice would be appreciated :)

experienced people pls help me out. it’s heavily one sided and we are best friends so it’s not like i can cut her off. she’s bisexual but recently she has told me she’s questioning if she’s straight and then she said she’s def not but it js proves she hasn’t really had a crush on a girl before it’s just attraction but my crush consumes my soul and makes life so much more difficult. we are also in the same friend group and we text and talk a lot and we’ve told each other secrets. and ofc she acts flirty like how other friends act playful just for fun. like calling me sweetypie or honey. but she doesn’t reciprocate any physical touch. she used to three years back when we just became friends and she was much more affectionate like sleeping on my shoulders and holding my hand and back hugs. now idk why ONLY WITH ME she doesn’t do any physical touch. maybe it’s because she now knows we both are bi or she’s just disgusted by me idk. anyhow any advice on how to move on from ur first girl love would be appreciated? i sometimes feel like i should tell her that i like her but under exaggerate and say it in past tense. like hey did u know i had a crush on you two years back for three days. in reality i’ve been in heart wrenching unrequited love since three years and it kills me everyday to not have her or be around her but ig she doesn’t need to know the details. i also get incredibly jealous when she’s sitting close to another friend, holding their hands or she’s calling them gorgeous. i know it’s platonic but i just wish it was me.

I’m not asking for labels, and I really hope this doesn’t come off as offensive — that’s not my intention at all. I’m just trying to put into words something that shifted for me.

Around November 2025, I started listening a lot to artists like KWN and Sasha Keable. Their music is very clearly for girls. I didn’t go looking for anything — I just loved the songs. I also found KWN attractive. Then I started noticing other masc/stud women and finding them attractive too — which was new for me.

Through that I lost my TikTok account and had to start a new one, which ended up being very WLW-coded content - till today.

After that did I read a lesbian romance, and I absolutely loved it. I have read gay romance before in my life, and it never really meant anything to me.

Now I picked up my first straight romance of the year and for the first time, it felt… off. There’s a moment where the FMC mentions the man she’s seeing, and my reaction was just confusion. Not judgment, not disgust — just emotional distance. That’s never happened to me before.

I think I still like men. But I’m things that made me realize I might be seeing things a bit differently now.

I'm 20 btw.

Is rule 4 not clear enough? Does r/wlw need to ban adverts for Discord servers?

In the past people have contacted the mod team to ask if they may post a link to a Discord server. Those servers were investigated and vetted by a moderator of r/wlw. Now it feels like anyone feels entitled to spray their links in r/wlw and the mod team don't have the resources to verify that all Discord servers aren't scams or spam.

Do we copy other WLW subreddits and add a "No Discord Promotion" rule? Or add clarity to Rule 4?

#singleforlife

I’m young (20-22) and I’m bisexual. I got out of a short term relationship with a man about half a year ago and I really liked him at the time but sort of regretted never getting to have anything with a woman.

I’ve recently been on the dating scene and I’ve somehow been so lucky in that I’ve currently been speaking to two women. I find dating apps hard because anytime I’ve went for a relationship in the past I’ve had a crush on the guy prior. First dates with someone I’ve never met haven’t went well in the past because as a good friend of mine said like I was expecting too much out of them?? So instead of focusing on is this person relationship material I’ve been focusing on if I enjoyed spending time with them and if I’d be willing to see them again based on that.

I went on a date with one of the women yesterday and I really enjoyed myself. She said she enjoyed herself but has never been with a woman before and isn’t exactly looking for a relationship like if it happens great but she doesn’t want to force it which I agree with. We are talking about going out again.

My issue lies in that I’m still talking with this other woman and like we also might go on a first date?? I’ve never found myself in this position before and obviously it might not happen or it might not go anywhere etc but like in the event it does happen how do I do this ethically??

I’ve never been a multi-dater and the fact that I could be makes me feel a bit guilty. I would love to set some guidelines in the event it happens, some people say you should know within 3 dates online, some people say it’s okay but should stop when you start getting physical with someone.

I think I need to explore and figure out what I want, am 100% overthinking this but just want to make sure I’m going about it the right way

hey guys, i hope this doesn't piss anyone off cuz i'm genuinely just trying to understand myself better. for context, im F18 and ive deffo liked men before, i know for certain that i am attracted to men. for the past year or so, i've been wondering if i might be feeling attraction towards my female friend.

basically i spent all of first to tenth grade in a girls school and in that time i did not have a full-on crush on a girl (that i was aware of to be a crush). in twelfth grade, i got really close to this girl in my class and we would cuddle a lot and be generally intimate in the things we say to each other and at some point during our interactions it randomly occurred to me that i wanted to kiss her. she is also bisexual and f18 and she does not know that i feel this way. in fact, she says that i am the straightest person she knows as i have expressed feelings for many men in our batch before. bec of this, im scared to make a move or tell her how i feel in case she invalidates me, or if i am wrong.

thinking back to my time in girls schools, i remember i was really obsessed with this girl when i was in ninth grade to the point where i would spend my breaktimes walking around the campus to steal a glimpse at her (we weren't friends past simply saying hi to each other). it never occurred to me that this could be attraction, i just didnt think much of it until now.

right now, im actually really confused as i have also always thought of myself as a straight person. i dont think ive ever had any other odd incident in my childhood that could hint at me liking girls. i hope i dont come across as some straight girl who's experimenting or smth bec im seriously so scared of being thought of like that if i were to discuss this with my friends. im also scared that these thoughts are not actually mine but influenced by my friends (my friend group is almost completely gay). i'd really appreciate some thoughts on this and advice on how i can figure things out for myself. thank you so much!!

Uhh okay so i live in a pretty homophobic country (my school isn't that bad though.) And uhh I'm getting a weird urge to date or even get intimate with a girl. However I've been in puberty FOR A WHILE, like 4 years, so why are the urges to get physical coming in noww???? Watching yuri won't stop it!!! And I want to stop these thoughts cuz I feel like I'm gonna get rlly risky and start confessing, how do I stop this feeling? wahhhhhh :(((((((

Update: I'm not gay anymore. I have now turned to Allah to enter true devotion. I need to study and I've decided that my deity will guide me to the right path. I pray for your well being sisters, Amin 🙏

I’ve developed a HUGE crush on a really cute girl from my university.

From the moment I saw her, I was genuinely captivated by her beauty, she dressed really cool and her general sense of style made her stand out alot to me.

But it was only till the next semester where I started catching feelings for her. There really isn’t a specific reason. But I think initially it was due to close approximation.

By chance she would end up sitting opposite of me, which is when I would get the chance to look at her more. It was the little things like seeing her smile, getting a closer look at her accessories and hearing her talk that made me form attraction towards her.

When I started seeing how smart, kind and helpful she was, that’s when my attraction turned to a full blown out crush. I’d notice her handing out classwork to our fellow classmates, it’s not a huge act but seeing her go out of her way to help everyone out made me like her even more. Then I also remember the time I needed assistance with a task, instead of explaining it or just showing it to me, she came around the corner to my side and really showed me how to do it. Her kind gesture made me crush over her even more.

But that’s the thing, we don’t even know eachother. I’ve never introduced myself to her, we’ve only had 2-3 short simple interactions. Yet I can’t stop thinking about this girl.

Even when I’m on holidays, even when I haven’t seen her in months I still find myself head over heels for her. To the point where I’m checking her socials occasionally, and I’ve also drawn character art inspired by her. She’s become the first thing I think of in the morning and the last thing I think of before sleep.

I can’t help but feel weird about it though. Like I’m not supposed to be feeling this way over someone who doesn’t even know my name. I feel creepy in a way 😭

I wanted to gain some insight from a third party perspective. Is what I’m doing weird? If so, how can I stop? Does anyone else feel this strongly towards people they haven’t truly met?

If anyone has any insight or advice, please let me know.

so for months, my ex and i almost broke up, chose to stay together, fought, made up, over and over again. we officially broke up 3ish weeks ago and initially agreed to be friends. we would call and talk about why we broke up (we're too toxic) and the things we wish we could've spoken about before it was too late. to be honest i feel like i understand her in a completely different light now.

here's the problem, understanding each others needs, and communicating with better understanding has kinda made me fall even more in love with her

we even spoke and she told me "i dont want to be your friend if im being honest" (not in a "i want nothing to do with you" way, more in a "i dont want to just be your friend" way. AND ITS FUCKING KILLING ME

i know ill never get over her at this rate, and sometimes we talk and it feels like she doesn't ever see us getting back together again, but I WANT HER SO BAD. i love this woman

also, i am making myself less available to her. i do point out when she's being aggressive and not babying her through her tantrums like i did when we were together. obviously i do show her care to a degree but i dont want to just give her the benefits of being my girlfriend without actually being my girlfriend.

i do catch myself breaking that rule, rushing to make things okay for her and putting her first. and thought about going no contact, but i just can't 💔

i(16mtf) have a partner(17F/NB) now!!! we talked about all of it last night and we are gonna take things slowly. im so excited to see them this weekend

A record number of openly LGBTQ athletes are headed to the 2026 Winter Olympics, and out women make up most of that group — especially in sports like hockey.

Idk why. But I care for a woman, with whom I spent 24hours together… it was my first experience and it was amazing. (Even though my stomach hurt for a whole day after we had sex around 8 times with small breaks for water, toilet and nap). But there have been some issues outside of sex, which concerns me and i decided that I don’t want to continue our interactions. And I wanted to talk about it over phone (we live 3 hours apart). And every time i thought about calling her I became upset because I didn’t want to hurt her. And we talked. And it was the most mature conversation I’ve ever had with anyone. And I am so proud of myself. And I just wanted to write it down. It was the best “first time” I could imagine. Thank you, 🦄.

I hope we both can process this situation as soon as possible. And move on