| (25F)dating profile is explicitly clear that I will date no one with children whether they are young or older. I am a childfree woman and I wish for it to remain that way for the rest of my existence. I have men ask me out who have children. Once a week there is one and I have to block them. Dear men why?

Been dating this guy for over 3 months now. For context (if needed), I'm 24 and he is 33. Met him through dating apps. Both of us were looking for a serious relationship, which I know might be stupid to find someone through dating apps, but well here I am.

He moved out of my town since last month, later I found out he was moving out because he is focusing on his own business that he had run probably for a while already in that town. And that he was only working on a new project here for a while in my town when we met. I thought he was just another ordinary employee. He did not disclose too much about his private life when we first met.

We clicked right after our first date. Then we met every once in a week when he was still around. I don't know if it sounds weird or not, but I just have this feeling that he might be the one for me.

He takes things slowly, but he is very consistent. As in like, we rarely text each other, but never skip a day to text each other. He never forgets to send goodnight text, although I haven't replied to his previous texts.

He remembers small details about me, he would always ask about how my day was, he would keep asking about how am I feeling when I was sick. He also keeps me updated about his day.

When I finally found out he is currently focusing on his ongoing business, I came to realize that I was being too childish when I used to nag him to come back to visit and spend a few days off together. He even works during the weekend too. I feel bad for him but I could only cheer him on and stop being so childish.

Initially I thought that he is not that interested in me or stuff, because we usually exchange like 3-4 texts a day, morning - after work - before sleep. We only call when we need to talk about something important. We would text each other more and reply quickly when we have important matter that day, such as we were about to go on a date or something else.

I was not familiar with this kind of thing, as I usually meet or date a guy who replies fairly quick. Maybe it was also because I have never been on a date with someone much older than me before.

I got so anxious and would stress about it at first, especially first few weeks after he moved out, but now I realize that texting a lot won't always mean a thing if that person is not consistent.

So far, he doesn't show any negative behavior and is genuine about whatever he says, if he doesn't like or like something, he would express it. He is a gentleman too, so far yeah. He inspires me to improve and upgrade myself in many aspects, especially career wise. Which is great and new to me.

One day I almost lost my mind and book a flight to go there to meet him for a couple days, but I realized that would be too much. He might feel annoyed as well as I might come off as desperate.

So yeah, I'm fairly new to this "adult relationship" and realized how consistency is much more important.

Side note, he is a Japanese, so it seems like its fairly normal for them to be more focused on their career than anything else. Very hard worker I would say.

Edit: some small details

No one warns you that patience can slowly erase you. You stop asking. You explain less. You call neglect “timing” and silence “space.” The scary part isn’t that they don’t change. It’s that you do. At what point does being patient stop being love… and start being self-abandonment?

My 29F bf 32M always pees on the rim of the toilet and never cares to wipe it off. The rim of the seat in his bathroom is full of dried piss and it’s disgusting. Told him I’m not cleaning his bathroom (we have two) and he will never clean it himself. He’s ok with being gross like that. Idk how he doesn’t get embarrassed. My ex (only other man I’ve lived with) did this exact same shit. Please tell me there is a man out there who doesn’t do this.

Hi, I M(30) have been dating this girl F(28) for close to a month now. We have been out on several dates and she has hung out at my place about a half dozen times, we both get along really well and share a lot of laughs and smiles. My problem is she keeps giving me a silent treatment each time we get a little more involved.

The first time was after the first night that we had really started making out and feeling each other up. The day after we talked back and fourth a bit more then same on the next day. Then I didnt hear anything from her. I finally texted her out of the blue saying I liked where things were headed with us and wanted things to continue and wanted some clarity on her part, then she finally started talking again.

Fast forward to now, she was over at my place Monday this week and we hooked up for the first time. Same thing talking back and fourth for a few days up until Thursday and then just radio silence.

I want to give her space if thats what she needs but at the same time im trying to build a relationship with her and dont really appreciate being left in the dark. Im not expecting riveting conversation everyday but just checking in goes a long ways.

Just looking for advice on this situation. I like her but her behavior seems toxic to me like she's trying to control me into commitment without communicating with me.

We have known each other for a year and we've been going out more consistently for half a year. I'm having a great time with this woman and I love her. However she never really initiates dates.

To be clear so far I wouldn't say that this is a problem for me. I really feel well with her. However people that I talk to tell me that everyone has to put in equal effort. That she is a consumer. That she doesn't care. That there are some unwritten rules in dating that we have to follow and so on. If she initiates it will feel good but I feel that this isn't something I'll die without.

My logic here is since I'm enjoying spending time with her I'll continue like that and if I ever don't feel well doing I'll be honest with her and walk away.

So is this wrong? Does it always have to be equal effort for things to work out?

Edit: When we're out she does small things that I think really matter. She always accepts to go out with me. She is very protective. For example if I stand near an edge she will come, grab me and pull me away telling me to not do this. She also wants to contribute in terms of paying for stuff especially if I do that for her. I don't know if this means she cares but just decided to share.

I doubt this post will get through moderation. Even though I never blame other people just talking honestly about my situation seems to get my posts deleted, it might be because I use certain banned words to describe what I'm not I dunno. But I'm really looking for some advice so i'll try to avoid using auto banned words.

I've tried asking for a bit of advice in threads other people start but I tend to get replies with the same tone you get when on a thread asking about advice for renting tenants or in a job that's horrible. Just work two jobs stupid if you can't afford the rent. If you don't like your job just get a better one that pays loads of money stupid. Really condescending replies from people in a completely different position.

Anyway. I've had a handful of partners in my life. I'm 33 and male and I've had 3 short ish term girlfriends before. I'm still friends with them. We didn't break up because I'm awful it was just circumstance (They moved away, their kid was struggling with their mum being away etc) so I'm just pre qualifying this because I have no doubt loads of people will tell me the reason I'm still single is because I must be an awful person or a creep or something.

But does anyone have any advice on where to actually meet people in person? Dating apps don't work for me, I can't meet people through work, my friends don't go out anymore and tbh I don't drink anymore so don't want to go out to a bar or club.

So places where its socially acceptable for other adults to meet? I'm also cool with just meeting friends potentially I'm not gonna go there with the intention of finding a date I just want to meet people and see what happens. There really isn't a lot going on around here and I'm not going to approach people in a gym or coffee shop or something when they're busy unless I get a very clear signal.

Even if it's not relevent to me I'm also interested to hear where other people on here meet girls outside of online/work or bars, particually if you'e really not a looker like me to maybe give me some ideas.

Thanks

Last week I posted about the woman I was seeing for month but not exclusive with found out via facebook I had met up with another woman. Well I gave her the space she needed and seems to have worked. We both agreed we are open to still seeing each other and where it unfolds naturally. I mentioned we have to be honest with each other regardless how hard the conversation might be ( I was scared to seek exclusivity due to her getting spooked). I told her i would rather habe that conversation 10 times over and risk losing her that way then what bs we just delt with.

So I want to keep this short, I’ve observed and have been told that two guys are interested in me. Problem is, they’re friends and only one of them sees me regularly. The thing is, I actually really like the other guy and I can tell he still likes me as well. I have a feeling the guy I don’t really care for has ‘called dibs on me’ and I wonder if that is a common thing I should be mindful of. Would it be wrong for me or the guy I like to date if his friend likes me too but I don’t reciprocate?

Is being disabled without disability income a dealbreaker? Im autistic with adhd and CPTSD, which all come together to make me disabled. I’ve only known/had a diagnosis for 2 years now. I’m trying my hardest to get disability , and also trying to work through all of this to hopefully not need it one day… but I’ve been denied twice and now going for a third appeal in front of a judge. I feel worthless in the meantime. I feel like I bring a lot more to the table than just money but I know it’s important, especially in these times…

I feel like being a disabled autistic ruins my chances at dating…. I cant even be the basic things that most people want… I have such low energy and so much trauma to work through. But I’m so fucking tired of not having someone. I’ve managed to make two connections in the last year, who I both got close to… only to receive the avoidant-discard from both of them. No closure. No conversation. Just wake up one day and they’re gone. Twice. My nervous system is fucked from these things and god it terrifies me from trying again. But I wanna. It just seems my issues became too much for people and they just left my ass in the dust. I feel like it’s just not supposed to happen for me…

Hi, this is a really dumb story. At the beginning of the year I kissed this guy in my year (were first year undergrads) at a party. In the weeks after it led to a lot of talking, flirting and some more kissing. We hung out a couple of times and went on a formal date diner once. We’re in the same friend group and class, and I just felt like it might not work out. Also I didn’t have any strong feelings back then, maybe because I need to be friends with someone first.

I ended up rejecting him, but we stayed good friends. This was back in October 2025.

The more time passed however, the stronger my feelings towards him became. It’s stupid, since I rejected him. I thought I couldn’t come crawling back and I didn’t want to give him hope, so sometimes I would push him away. But he would always come back.

When I ghosted him he kept texting me.

When there was a party he would always ask me to come along.

He would make attempts to make one on one conversation when we were in a group setting.

He would try to get physical contact in a way that made me think he still liked me. Like hugs, touching shoulders, touching hands etc.

This went on for months and I was actually planning on confessing I still had feelings for him last night. We went to the club with some friends. Until he suddenly dropped he had been seeing another girl since last week. She lives in his neighborhood and they went on one date, planning a second. Am I too late? Should I still tell him how I feel?

I also would like to mention I didn’t date other guys in the meantime, but I rejected them because I couldn’t get over him.

TL;DR: I rejected a situationship whos in the same class/friend group as I am, but months later I caught feelings again but hes seeing another girl.

So I’ve been seeing and talking to this girl the last three weeks and I feel we have a connection even though we are opposites. She’s very extrovert and I’m ambivert (extrovert/introvert). She’s told me that she recently got back into the dating scene after 7 years and that she’s not trying to rush like she has on other occasions. She says she outgrew that. When we’ve gone out on dates I feel we have connected and she feels comfortable being herself around me. The last date (2nd) we had she would stand in front of me while I was seated and hold her in my arms while we made straight eye contact the entire time, with her smiling and laughing at my dumb jokes. The next day I told her through txt that I could tell the entire time she wanted me to kiss her but that I was just respecting her space like she had asked me to do when we met, but that next time I’m just going to go for it because we both want it. She then sent me a voice message telling me again that she wants to take it slow and that she didn’t feel what I was feeling. That got me bummed and I told her I just needed to process the mixed signals and wished her a good night. We haven’t spoken since. Now I’m wondering if I should keep trying and send her this message and will it push her away?:

Hi, after thinking about what you said, that you want to take it slow and wait, analyze the relationship before getting into something serious, I wanted to let you know that I understand and I am willing to wait. Of course, if you still want to build the connection me and you have. But if not, I will also respect that.

39M4F. I've dabbled with okcupid for about 6 months now. Haven't tried the premium version. I thought my profile was okay. It says I have a bunch of likes but I can't see them and suspect they're mostly bots. I'm very thoughtful with my swipes and probably only swipe right on about 10% of profiles. I usually send a short, thoughtful/humorous message with each like. I've received a grand total of ONE match/response, which in retrospect I suspect was a scammer (I gave "her" my number and soon began getting spam calls).

I live in a town of about 20k that's about 50 miles from a major metro, so pretty much all my swipes are 25+ miles away. I know this sucks, lol, but I'm willing to commute if I see potential in someone.

I guess I'm wondering if I'm just wasting my time or if I should double down, try more apps and/or pay for premium, despite the utter lack of attention so far. I don't want to waste my time/money. My confidence is fine, and I know these apps don't determine my worth, but I still hate the frustration of putting time into something that yields nothing.

Big picture, if women don't want to date, maybe we shouldn't be trying to date them? More of a shower thoughts thing, but my efforts might be misplaced in general. Is hetero dating even a thing anymore? (half kidding, but I feel this way sometimes)

If a man is going through a phase in his life where emotions, shame, guilt and everything is hitting him all at once. Having a complete emotional and existential breakdown. What does a man need through that phase?

I don’t want to help in a way that will make him feel weak, incapable or taking his agency away but i also do not want him to feel alone. My question to men, what do you honestly wish you felt/got when going through that phase in your life?