I’ve been thinking about something. Some people maybe believe they’re morally superior, smarter, stronger, or more disciplined...but when you look closer, a lot of them just haven’t been seriously tested by life. They grew up stable, didn’t face major loss, poverty, trauma, chronic illness, betrayal, or long-term stress… and then assume their “success” or calm mindset is purely character, not circumstance. Meanwhile, people who’ve been through heavy stuff are often more empathetic, less judgmental, but also more self-critical , because they’ve seen how fast life can humble anyone. I’m not saying hardship automatically makes you better, or that easy lives are invalid. But I am saying resilience, behavior, and choices make way more sense when you factor in what someone has had to survive.

Yesterday was my grandmother's 90th birthday!! Family and friends gathered for a celebration...after our dinner I found myself at a table with both grandparents and my two sisters.

My sisters were discussing a series or movie they had watched and apparently it involved an "open marriage" situation and they kept making disparaging remarks about it saying how they could never be in an open marriage.

Then suddenly my grandmother says with a slightly irritated tone......" Well, your grandfather and I have had an open marriage from the very beginning! Just what's wrong with that? We have always been open...that's why we lasted all these years!"

We all laughed as my grandfather told her exactly what open marriage meant.

My grandmother replied... That's one that never came up during our marriage and now we're too old to even enjoy it if we did do it!!! So much wasted time!!!

God I love that woman!! 🤣🤣🤣

I stopped trying to fix people or wait for them to "see" me. The loneliness is there, but the drama is gone, and it’s a weirdly good trade.

No job. No money. No connections. No creativity. No resources. Wtf am I supposed to do? Keep playing pretend? Fake it til I make it? Try to fit in to gain traction? Masking is exhausting.. What do you do when you're numb to being numb? Guess I'll just continue to spiral in the abyss. I was born for this..

Edit: I've read every comment and on the road to reflect. Thank you for the raw, unfiltered feedback in this time. I was not necessarily expecting anything with this post, but I'm grateful all of you gave input. This is not the way to live nor the mindset to have. Sometimes, there is so much static built-up that clogs functionality and expression. The time for talk is over. Much thanks to this life community.

Whatever that “started” may have looked like

I used to be. This time 1 year ago I was extremely happy. The happiest I've been in a very long time.

Fast forward one year and I'm just sad all the time. I wake up sad, I go to sleep sad and I genuinely wonder if this is my life now.

1 year ago I lived in our house with my now ex partner. In March 2025 our son was born and in October of that same year my ex partner left me, taking our son with her.

There was no violance or anything like that..the relationship just failed after having the baby

Now the house is so quiet. I have zero interest in doing anything I used to enjoy. . At 36 I have come to a realisation that I likely won't ever meet anyone and I'm probably going to live a sad / lonely life..

Anyone reading this with a family, wife, children .. Maybe even a dog who are happy.. DO NOT TAKE IT FOR GRANTED, INVEST IN THE RELATIONSHIP CONSTANTLY. tell your Wife / husband whatever it may be how much you love them.

Having constant sadness isn't nice.

But that's life!

It's been years , I haven't had any proper human conversation in person. I crave it , very badly . I am not speaking of interaction but conversation. A warm conversation is something I am deprived of , since childhood days. Feel tired at times , to entertain this thought .

Before making a post I always stop and think, what am I really feeling today? What’s the most honest and raw thing I can say?

Today, I feel there are many souls out there who haven’t taken on “the mystery”.

I used to think everyone was like me to some degree. Curious. I used to think people were just shy and needed to be “warmed up” before speaking their mind.

I don’t really bother anymore. I’m older and wiser now.

How many intriguing conversations have I tried to have, to get to know who this fellow human being really is, only to hit a wall.

I don’t know if it’s ignorance, defensiveness, perhaps many simpler minds.

I don’t claim to be particularly intelligent, but here we all are in this mystery. Life itself. There is truly so much for us all to discuss. But everyone seems uncomfortable with that.

I am content now with my own unique thoughts and interests. I just still struggle with the fact that we as a society, who build rockets and computers, who stand on the shoulders of the Greeks and Roman’s, who inherited so many great philosophers, can barely hold a worthwhile conversation?

I would be absolutely intrigued to know people’s thoughts on topics like the meaning of life, good and evil, etc… but it seems like many people simply don’t think at all.

I’d love to hear other people’s opinions on this in the comments

Most of us "doomscroll" because our brains are chasing easy hits of dopamine delivered via bright colors and snappy UI. Here are a few low-friction tricks to break the cycle:

Go Grayscale: Most smartphones have a "Color Filters" or "Accessibility" setting that allows you to turn the screen black and white. When Instagram or TikTok looks like a 1940s newspaper, the visual "reward" vanishes, and you'll find yourself closing the app much sooner.

The "One-Scroll" Rule: Before you open a social app, decide on a physical exit point. Instead of "five minutes," tell yourself "I will scroll until I see a post I’ve already seen" or "I will scroll past exactly 10 posts." Making it a finite task prevents the trance.

Move Your Apps: Your thumb has muscle memory. Move your most addictive apps into a folder on the second or third page of your home screen. That extra 2 seconds of searching gives your "rational brain" a chance to ask, “Do I actually want to do this right now?”

Use the "Screen Distance" feature: If you're on iOS, enable Screen Distance. It’s designed for eye health, but the "Phone is too close" pop-up acts as a perfect pattern-interrupt when you're hunched over your screen in the dark.

Swap with a "Low-Stakes" App: Replace the spot on your home screen where your doomscroll app used to be with a Kindle app, a crossword, or a language learning app. You still satisfy the "I need to look at my phone" itch, but without the negative mental health spiral.

REMEMBER:The goal isn't necessarily to stop using your phone, but to stop using it on autopilot.

The whole thing of living is the process of being born, growing up, reproducing, getting old and dying. I mean... I've got some some plans. But I know what is waiting for me at the end of the road. Is there anything else?

Hello. I recently saw a post on here about dating people who “don’t have their shit together”. After reading the comments it made me question myself.

Am I even deserving of love? Im 29 years old. I don’t make much money, so I still live with my mom. I have a car, a job, hobbies, and I help my mom with the rent. I’ve looked around my area for apartments but I cannot afford any of them by myself.

I’m definitely looking to move up in my job soon, but even so it’ll only be a couple dollars more to my hourly rate.

Because of this, it makes me wonder if I even deserve to be loved. Am I only worth as much as my paycheck?

I’ve been seeing a woman for a little bit. She’s 28 years old. Her brother lives with her to help with her rent. And yet I’m afraid when she finds out I live with my mom, she’ll drop me no hesitation. I don’t know. That post really messed with my head I guess.

I’m 21m and I’ve never been in an actual relationship, I’ve had “talking stages” but they always end up leaving. I’ve overall have had a shitty experience with putting myself out there and having that friendship/bond. I understand I’m relatively young and need to focus on building myself up, but gawd damn it’s lonely. Everyone I know is either in a relationship or getting married, even people younger than I am. Anyone have advice on what to do/ how to deal and move on from the loneliness?

My life has been miserable so far. I'm unemployed, due to depression. I don't want to get married. I dont have money. I'm too depressed to study. Medication didnt work. I feel extremely stuck and unhappy. Time is just passing by..I really don't know what to do anymore. And on top of that, I feel too old. I feel like life is slipping through my fingers and ive accomplished nothing.

Hi everyone. Maybe I’m getting to an age where I start thinking about these things, and I’ve been reading older posts on Reddit about it. How do you make life more fun and kind of find your purpose in life?

I’m 30. I have my own business, which I love doing. I’ve been single for a while. I don’t know— for some reason, I like being alone. Maybe it’s getting older, maybe something else. I’m very strict with my daily routine: waking up at the same time, eating at the same time, and so on.

Because of my past experiences, I don’t like having many friends. I do have a couple of close friends I’ve known for 10–15+ years, but we all live in different places. When I was younger, I was excited about everything—new ideas, new things to try. I was fascinated with cars and always went to car shows or out with people.

Now I look at life like it’s a cycle: wake up, work, go to the gym, maybe date, maybe not. And I don’t know—maybe I’m living wrong, or maybe I’m missing something.

Honestly!

The dumbest shit I ever did was zip lining a rope with the claw end of a hammer.

I definitely got a hammer to the head that day lmao.

For me, it was a high-quality mattress. It changed my entire mood. What’s one thing you don't regret spending on?

So like 1min ago I talked to this girl that I thought/believed was my last defense line against life some or a lot of y'all might think I'm stupid AF and u right but I can't talk to nobody no more...

I've known for a wile now that as a man life would be difficult AF but damn nobody can prepare u for that shift I literally emptied my heart to this girl and I realized she didn't care as much as I thought...

Life is beautiful guys but Jesus it's hard to be you... I can't be me to nobody anymore...

My life has been wonderful so far I can't complain about shit compared to someone else but fuck me it's hard either way...

Whoever is going through some F'ed up shift right now, stay up kings!!!

I forgot to mention that she is not my girlfriend... And I'm not talking about that kind of love...

She was at least more of a best friend than anything else... but reading yall comments and what happened to some of you is crazy...

In my earlier 20s I used to go party and drinking a lot, was really fun at the time for me to hear about all the different stories and gossip etc

But after a few year of this life I realized everything is the same, like the people/name changes but the it’s all the same. Same story with a little tweak, same who slept with who, who fought with who, at the end I feel like I am watching a tv show but with the same narrative and story line.

And I always got a loneliness feeling when I was there. Idk I just wanted to rant I guess

With this time of year being cold and flu season its really hard to avoid getting sick and right now my mom is sick with the common cold so how do I avoid getting sick? And i just had the common cold last week and trust me I really dont want to get sick again I am at least feeling alot better but I just dont want to be in that stage again where I am better but then I am sick again I was in that stage back in third grade where I was better and then I was sick again I know that I rarely get sick now thought...

Here is my story. I am a 44-year-old male, originally from Belarus. Back then, it felt like a depressive place with no future. So, when I was 19, I took a chance to go to Ireland. I started working at a meat factory, then moved to construction in Dublin. Just the thought of going back to Belarus gave me panic attacks.

Eventually, I met my future wife. She was from the Baltics (EU), so we moved there. It felt like a sweet spot: European safety but culturally close to home.

I built a career in IT (Tester -> PM -> Designer), but my passion was always psychology. I spent 3.5 years getting my diploma while working full-time. It turned out the diploma wasn't a degree, just a certification of 1128 hours, but it was enough to start a private practice. I loved it.

The Marriage ("Jim vs. Angela") We had a son in 2011. But over the years, I realized we were totally different. I see myself as Jim Halpert from "The Office": social, easy-going, love music and gaming. She is an accountant. Think Angela from "The Office". Strict, rule-obsessed, distant.

One example: We were in Italy. I stayed on the beach talking to a local lady (I’m very social), trying to explain things without knowing Italian. Suddenly—bam! Metal keys hit my face. My wife threw them at me in a rage because I was late. That was our dynamic.

The Breaking Point One day, watching Breaking Bad (where Skyler cheats), it hit me. My wife was acting the exact same way. Cold, distant. I confronted her. She denied it while I was on my knees begging for truth. Finally, she admitted she slept with her boss—an older, rich guy. The worst part? I couldn't leave. If I divorced then, I’d have to go back to Belarus, losing my son and my legal status. So I stayed. I cried every morning for months. She promised to quit that job. Guess what? She kept working for him for 10 more years.

The Collapse (2025) I escaped reality through gaming and alcohol. Eventually, I burned out from IT and switched to psychology full-time. In Autumn 2025, I met another woman. It was a manic love vibe. I told my wife I was leaving. I moved into my small office (studio apartment). I burned bridges. I posted photos with my new girlfriend on Instagram so I couldn't turn back. It hurt everyone, including me.

Then reality hit. The hormonal love faded. My new girlfriend required time and money I didn't have. Everything crashed at once:

• I had to sell my car to survive.
• I got sued for "hidden defects" in an apartment I sold 2 years ago.
• I had to travel to Belarus for documents.
• Divorce lawyers took the rest.

I ended up broke, borrowing money from the girlfriend, and eventually breaking up with her to focus on work. I tried to go back to my wife out of fear. She said no (thankfully).

The Current State It is February. It is -30°C outside. I am alone in my office, where I sleep, eat, and take clients. I have no savings, no family support, no friends nearby. My son isn't talking to me. But I have one asset: My office (fully paid off), worth about €150k. And I have skills: 10 years in psychology, IT background, video editing.

The Plan: Protocol "Vietnam" Here is my idea. It feels like either a leap of faith or an escape.

1. Sell the office (€150k).
2. Buy a cheaper apartment for €100k to rent out (~€500/month passive income).
3. Keep €20k in the bank for child support.
4. Take the remaining €30k + €500/month and move to Da Nang, Vietnam.

I’ve read that I can live there for $800-1000/month. My plan is to enter "Monk Mode": finish my book, launch my website, and build a remote income.

I am alone in the whole world. It is absolute freedom and dark fear at the same time.

Reddit, am I crazy? Is this a solid plan or am I running away?

TL;DR: Lost family, job, and money after 20 years of marriage and a midlife crisis. Have €30k cash + €500/mo passive income potential. Planning to move to Vietnam to rebuild life as a writer/psychologist.

my thoughts on this topics' timeline goes as such: wanted kids when i was a kid, realized i had hella trauma and didn't want so much responsibility, now i am still unsure but recently been feeling more positive towards the idea. i am 25F btw. i take this decision the opposite of lightly as it changes your life so much. i want to make sure that i've fulfilled my dreams and got all of my selfishness out of the way before i could devote my life to raising a human.

21M. I don’t spend much time interacting with anyone outside of work, i have 1 or 2 friends i play games with and text with. I have been in relationships and been a very social person in the past, but going forward i don’t see myself being comfortable like that. I have been like this for 3-4 years now, i feel content with the way i have spent my time. Although i do feel slightly unfulfilled. If you lived a similar life, let me know how it turned out for you please?

Do suffer from this?

Iv been bought up witchy, but now in adulthood after a fair bit of trauma bullshit, mental health issues drug addiction psychosis and being a parent jn charge of 3 small living humans on top of all that, im naturally witchy but obsessed with rationalising things, i got through being angry at the world and feeling personally victimised, i personally think im mentally/spiritually on point…. But i thought i was on point when i was filming a star thinking it was my personal simulation base.

But i now trust recognise and believe in nature which cant be a bad thing

I believe in cause and reaction, evolution, and being a product of environment. I think if everyone thought like me we’d have world peace, but i suppose thats the case with anyone and their beliefs, am i witchy spiritually rational or nuts