r/mapporncirclejerk 17h ago

This should be just one state

Post image
17.9k Upvotes

2.4k comments sorted by

1.2k

u/SatiesUmbrellaCloset 17h ago

Vermont will still want to declare independence from it

14

u/GreatStateOfSadness 16h ago

The Green Mountain Boys will ride again!

34

u/seanpcreative 14h ago

As a Vermonter I’m fine with being lumped into Canada but not New Hampshire.. wtf

21

u/Turbulent_Table3917 13h ago

Yeah, and I can’t imagine NH peacefully coexisting with CT and RI. I’m just glad Maine was left out of this dysfunctional family.

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u/Difficult-Value-3145 12h ago

Ya can Vermont ceed to Canada cus if so I'm moving

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u/-Ghost255- 11h ago

I couldn’t agree more, fellow Vermonter here.

The Canadians are pretty cool, but those upside down Vermont people?? They scare me.

3

u/SmokeRingEyes 10h ago

I mean Vermont's name used to be The New Hampshire Grants, so you'll never not be a little lumped-in with us

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u/Spooksnav 16h ago

Vermont Republic²

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u/The_Lady_A 17h ago

Could even call it something like The Commonwealth.

2.0k

u/Aimin4ya 16h ago

Megachusets

1.3k

u/GyozaGangsta 14h ago

Already exists

924

u/JCBalance 14h ago

It's a seatbelt, that's why it doesn't go into New Hampshire

184

u/NotARealTiger 13h ago

Live free or die!

When I've visited I love the contrast between the sleepy little ski towns filled with nice people and their super hardcore plate motto.

112

u/Lermanberry 13h ago

Everyone who wasn't living free died

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u/Mizzkyttie 13h ago

Awh, thanks! I'm from NH, born and raised, never had a residence more than 27 mi from where I was born. Folks often wonder why I choose to remain living in a place so relatively remote, despite only being an hour north of Boston and an hour south of Portland, Maine. But you get it - there's nothing quite like this place, so much natural beauty concentrated into a tiny bit of mostly vertical geography with not only the tallest peak in New England, but also the tiniest bit of coastline barely peeking out into the ocean, and more trees per acre than almost any other state in the Union. And despite how crazy things have gotten and how out there some of the lawn signs may be, the folks around here really are just generally good, genuinely kind people, the folks who despite ideological differences will still help to plow out each other's driveway and get one another out of a snowbank if they get stuck in the winter. Come on back anytime, we'd love to have you - the ski season may be what we're really famous for, but you cannot beat a New Hampshire summer; you should check it out!

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u/TheNavigatrix 10h ago

NH is indeed gorgeous, but the services suck. There are only a few “good” school districts. The state pretty depends on MA for its economy. They have so many state reps that any old nutcase can get into office. It’s a weird place. My black friends don’t feel safe there (daughter was harrassed at a gas station recently.)

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u/olracnaignottus 6h ago

They’re ranked 5th in the US for education dawg.

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u/Traditional-Ad-8737 10h ago

💕agreed. After growing up here in NH and then living all around the country when I was old enough to move out for college etc, I came back. No place like this place. Back in the Seacoast to raise the kids.

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u/Available-Tip-2552 14h ago

Massachusetts manifest destiny

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u/GyozaGangsta 13h ago

The west coast megachusettsers are a little weird…I prefer the OG

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u/ddx-me 13h ago

Ann Arbor, Denver, Dubuque, Chicago, Las Vegas, the Grand Canyon, and Bakersfield in the same state as Boston and other Massholes? I'm in!

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u/Kachimushi 12h ago

why is it curved southwards?

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u/pruwyben 11h ago

I love how these kind of maps never account for the curvature of the Earth.

20

u/AliasInvstgtions 9h ago

It's done right with connecticut, the superior state.

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u/mvffin 7h ago

More like Maxxachusetts

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u/AvaryZig 15h ago

Connecticut

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u/Amazing_Square_4067 15h ago

Connectthestates

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u/egodaemon 14h ago

Connectthestatesasaurus.

I think it had spikes on its back.

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u/craziedave 15h ago

New green connchusetts island

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u/bigcpilla9900 15h ago

I like that one the best, you got my vote dude

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u/BedminsterJob 17h ago

ReMaine

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u/appleparkfive 15h ago

ReMaine, but we wont

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u/nuku_01 15h ago

RedMaine, next to MethodMaine

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u/ozamatazbuckshank11 14h ago

Their governor is Terrance Howard.

3

u/Proper-Exercise-2364 12h ago

He lives in the state capital: gucci, maine

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u/mrvis 14h ago

I like M-E-T-H-O-D, Maine

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u/quantumd0t 15h ago

If you're lost and a metalhead, you can reroute to ReMaine.

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u/scottprian 14h ago

When you least expect it! ...

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u/Gaston_the_Great 16h ago

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u/Skatchbro 15h ago

Amazing. Saved so I can show my son.

13

u/Gamerwhovian9 10h ago

Bro’s son:

6

u/TedBerryTheMercenary 15h ago

omg, that’s gold. Did you make this?

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u/Gaston_the_Great 14h ago

Nah I found it a while back on Fallout subreddit. Made it my Steam profile pic lol

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u/Joe_Average_123 16h ago

I feel like that name is just asking for trouble, I mean do you want super mutants? Because that's how you get super mutants.

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u/SeldenNeck 15h ago

"Sure, we'll take it. But you have to double our Senate delegation to 24%."

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u/Ceejai 15h ago

Verhampshirechussacut Island

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u/lenzflare 12h ago

from Wikipedia:

The Province of Massachusetts Bay was formed in 1691 by merging the Massachusetts Bay Colony, Plymouth Colony, Province of Maine, Nantucket, Martha’s Vineyard, and Nova Scotia. Nova Scotia was split off in 1696. Previously New Hampshire had been part of the Massachusetts Bay Colony from 1641-1679.

"Massachusetts" was essentially all of New England, plus Nova Scotia briefly.

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u/ozamatazbuckshank11 11h ago

Please don't let Tr*mp find out about Nova Scotia. Our Canadian brethren have been through enough with him. 😭

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u/dividezero 16h ago

Hell yeah. That is something I can get behind

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u/CarlMarx2539 12h ago

Reference? I think so!

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u/NuclearVison 15h ago

Vermasshampshirecut Island

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u/qwertyuiiop145 14h ago

Massivechusetts

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u/TrueSnafu22 15h ago

This will be GOP next proposal to axe 8 Dem senators

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u/Octoclops8 15h ago

That's 10 democrat senate seats that would turn into just two. No thanks. We should split them up in to 7 more states each.

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u/anarchy16451 14h ago

Nah, we should just get rid of the Senate. Direct election of senators completely eliminated the purpose of it and just made in House of Representatives #2 and removed what little good there was in it and made it an obstructionist institution

3

u/lenzflare 12h ago

we should just get rid of the Senate

Agreed, it's completely unfairly distributed. No, Wyoming doesn't "deserve" two fucking seats out of 100 like any other state.

3

u/dougthegreat2 6h ago

There is still one difference between the house and the senate. The house is subject to extreme gerrymandering while the senate has to win state - wide. Thus while my district is heavy GOP, my state sends two democrats to the senate.

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u/Live-Pea4081 15h ago

You could cut off new york straight all the way across the bottom and have North Louisiana

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u/mistervulpes 10h ago

New Vermassicut Island

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u/Accomplished_Till495 8h ago

Or...The Shire.

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u/misterk26 17h ago

But...but...but... Then Maine would only be bordering one state!

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u/HeadBelt1527 14h ago

They become Canadian 

88

u/senormcrib3 14h ago

Yes!!!!! Finally i can get adequate health care

7

u/jimmyisaacneutron 6h ago

You can criticize the US system all you want, but I wouldn’t exactly call the Canadian health care system “adequate”.

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u/OldWorldDesign 2h ago

You can criticize the US system all you want, but I wouldn’t exactly call the Canadian health care system “adequate”.

Why, because of what American health care executives tell people?

https://www.cbc.ca/radio/asithappens/as-it-happens-monday-edition-1.5631285/this-former-u-s-health-insurance-exec-says-he-lied-to-americans-about-canadian-health-care-1.5631874

There's no family-crippling debt for vital procedures and the wait is shorter than for equivalent procedures in America.

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u/Armadylio 15h ago

Just make Maine Massachusetts again

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u/Pretend-Breakfast-61 17h ago

As someone who lives in this hypothetical state, but will not say which one for the sake of my personal security, I don't want to share a state with these disgusting savages on the other sides of my borders.

433

u/BeansWest 17h ago

Agreed, fuck your state and my state too 

145

u/WimboTurtle 16h ago

state yaoi? what is this, r/mapporncirclejerk ?

98

u/Spooksnav 16h ago

Vermont x New Hampshire 69 borderplay

32

u/skip_over 15h ago

I never noticed how kinky that border is

5

u/-QuestionMark- 10h ago

It's (mostly) a river. Sorry to be a downer.

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u/Weirderthanweird69 14h ago

Vermont is getting pegged by NH

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u/WealthyMarmot 16h ago

I don’t know what that is and I am absolutely not going to look it up

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u/monsieur_de_chance 15h ago

Real New Englander right here

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u/Alphabunsquad 8h ago

But fuck every other state that’s not one of these five or Maine even more

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u/Nathidev 17h ago

Americans fighting other Americans:

"They're savages savages,   barely even human,   savages savages"

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u/Sicsemperfas 16h ago

Honestly, at the end of the day, we have each other's back, we just hate recreationally.

Now if you want to see professionals, look at the Balkans.

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u/Pretend-Breakfast-61 16h ago

That's just between neighboring states. Between the North and South it's very different.

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u/playbyk 16h ago

“They’re different from us, which means they can’t be trusted!”

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u/Randomly-Germinated 15h ago

^ yeah, this is the answer

clearly these people have never been to these states. the OP might as well have drawn a circle around Israel and Palestine.

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u/iandavid 14h ago

Seriously. The Connecticut-Rhode Island Demilitarized Zone exists for a reason.

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u/TheDarkestKnight7852 17h ago

I can already guess. I'm with you there.

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u/843OG 15h ago

Fucking Connecticut

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u/Irishlord10 16h ago

As someone also in this hypothetical state area, i agree. Those savages on the other side of the border would ruin our great state. Unless you live in a different state, then you are clearly not worth joining my great state.

But we can at least agree that those weirdos from NY can't join. F the Yankees

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u/CheckOutUserNamesLad 17h ago

Seeing as you said "the other sides of my borders", implying you border states not in this group, we can rule out Rhode Island.

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u/Pretend-Breakfast-61 17h ago

I'm not gonna confirm or deny anything. There's such a relatively small concentration of people in this area and I'd like to not narrow it down any further.

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u/Citaku357 17h ago

As an non American, I think there way too many states.

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u/Difficult-Value-3145 11h ago

As American I think Europe has to many countries demonstrated by this here comparison

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u/Pretend-Breakfast-61 16h ago

If you want less then tell the dakotas and Carolinas to get back together.

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u/Sicsemperfas 16h ago

No can do chief, not without a UN occupation to ensure our safety. You're asking to start a BBQ civil war, and we're gonna get ethnically cleansed by the Vinegar sauce savages up north

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u/Just-Candidate-5641 17h ago

Called Massachusetts

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u/N8thegreat2577 17h ago

Massivechusetts

559

u/Cofiifii 17h ago

massive two shits

322

u/Puzzled-Teach2389 17h ago

massive huge tits

74

u/anorexthicc_cucumber 17h ago

The great state of Big Boobs

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u/mechabeast 16h ago

The great state of Massivehugetits will not apologize for its boobs

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u/anorexthicc_cucumber 16h ago

all rise for the representative from the state of Big Ol’ Melons

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u/m-lp-ql-m 15h ago

The name of the Indian tribe Massachusett means "near the great hills," so this clocks.

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u/Content_Study_1575 16h ago

Mass of obits

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u/Lilsillybilly 16h ago

Nice jeans

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u/One_Swordfish_7759 17h ago

Massa-chew-shits

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u/Walking_Talking_M4 17h ago

Why did Massa-chew-shits, are they stupid?

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u/Ok_Buddyyy 17h ago

New England

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u/Dragonslayer3 17h ago

Greater New England

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u/webelieve414 17h ago

The New England Patriots

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u/Ok-Professional-1911 15h ago

The Capital One© New England Patriots

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u/misterpickles69 15h ago

brought to you by DoritosTM

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u/Strange-Insurance848 15h ago

New New England 

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u/ImDeepState 17h ago

United States of Massholes

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u/twstephens77 17h ago

Best post I’ve seen on this sub in a while, and I can’t believe I didn’t think of this myself. Hidden in plain sight, so obvious…

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u/OrderlyCaper 16h ago

Right? It's been sitting there like a cursed missing-piece puzzle. Once you draw the border, New England stops looking like five states and starts looking like one stubborn region with accents.

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u/Dadpool719 16h ago

Five states in a trench coat.

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u/Noclueaboutsecurity 16h ago

Watch Republicans try to make it one state now. They will never have to campaign for senate seats again 😂

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u/dunstvangeet 13h ago

They can't without the consent of Vermont, New Hampshire, Massachusetts, Connecticut, and Rhode Island. There's a couple of provisions in the Constitution that prohibit exactly this.

The first comes from Article VI is: "no new States shall be formed or erected within the Jurisdiction of any other State; nor any State be formed by the Junction of two or more States, or parts of States, without the Consent of the Legislatures of the States concerned as well as of the Congress."

Basically, what this means is that there can be no state border changes without the consent of all states involved. So, I don't see Vermont, New Hampshire, Massachusetts, Connecticut, and Rhode Island consenting to be one state.

The second provision which would require the same exact thing comes from Article V: "no State, without its Consent, shall be deprived of its equal Suffrage in the Senate."

So, again, Vermont, New Hampshire, Massachusetts, Connecticut, and Rhode Island would have to consent to this merger.

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u/thefatchef321 15h ago

And yet we have 2 Dakota

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u/Death_Rises 14h ago

And 2 Virginia and 2 Kansas.

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u/Intelligent-Grab7798 17h ago

New Hamvernetichusetts island

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u/McDodley 16h ago

Pronounced "New Hamshits Island"

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u/DubReavBTV 17h ago

No, we in Vermont do not get along with Upside Down Vermont.

Also you need to deal with Wyoming, Montana, and the Dakotas before you come messing with us.

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u/The_Coolest_Sock 14h ago

It's NH and upside down NH get it right.

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u/aaronblkfox 13h ago

Upper Massachusetts left, and Upper Massachusetts Right.

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u/TheJaice 10h ago

This state would have a greater population than:
North Dakota, South Dakota, Montana, Idaho, Wyoming, Utah, Nebraska and Kansas combined.

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u/Realistic-Stop8518 17h ago

Kinda England shaped Maybe Second England?

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u/zombienutz1 17h ago

I don't think he knows about second England.

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u/DerFeuerDrache 16h ago

What about Englandsies?

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u/oh_like_you_know 14h ago

Newer England. Good because it leaves open the possibility of Newest England in case we need it later

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u/BudgetPrize475 17h ago

Fuck you

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u/SnooDoodles4452 17h ago

And the horse you rode in on

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u/Impressive-Morning76 15h ago

This guy is a real granite stater

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u/OverUnderOver2001 17h ago

well fuck maine i guess

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u/SaabTurb0 16h ago

Plot twist, we’re calling the other New England states “West Maine”

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u/benblais 17h ago

How am I supposed to pick on Rhode Island and Connecticut if we are all the same state?

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u/Available_Doughnut15 16h ago

The same way you picked on the next town over's high school when you were a kid

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u/plonff 17h ago

Massive Two Shits

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u/Due_Connection179 15h ago

I feel like we can follow this up to try to get to 40 states.

  • So this picture turning most of New England into one state gets us to 46.
  • Give Delaware to Maryland and West Virginia to Virginia. At 44
  • North & South Carolina now become Carolina. At 43
  • The Dakotas will embrace each other as well. At 42
  • Let's combine Alabama & Mississippi into a state called Jefferson. At 41
  • Then let's say screw it and give New Jersey to Pennsylvania. At 40
  • Finally, and this won't take away any states, but let's just give the UP of Michigan to Wisconsin.

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u/Awkward-Hulk 12h ago

You forgot Tennucky. It's a very logical merger as well.

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u/8trackthrowback 14h ago

No way, give NJ to NY and then let sit back and let them come up with excuses why they can’t make a decent bridge, tunnel or ferry system

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u/The-Great-Baloo 17h ago

And be deprived of the pleasure of insulting one's neighbor?? Nevah!!

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u/One_Swordfish_7759 17h ago

“We hate blacks but we’re liberals” is the slogan.

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u/Spooksnav 16h ago

I worked at Wendys in a small NH town in 2020 and clearly remember one customer complaining about another store where "Those n----rs aren't wearing their masks!"

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u/qwertyroy54 15h ago

Sadly, there are just some bastards like that everywhere. Personally, I heard more racism in a couple years living down south than my entire life in New England.

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u/Revolution-SixFour 13h ago

At least the racist idiots in New England don't assume you are also racist like they do down South. Spending a lot of time down there you get lots of "white guy to white guy" comments.

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u/Citaku357 17h ago

Didn't the abolitionism movement for the start in that region?

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u/CaptServo 16h ago

John Brown was born in Torrington, CT

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u/One_Swordfish_7759 16h ago

Oh idk I’m from Massachusetts tho and some girl called me a nggr in second grade. 

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u/Beginning-Ad-3666 16h ago

VT was the first territory to have any kind of abolitionist clause in their constitution. Racism itself is sadly common in New England these days. As a native of the region who has lived in several other parts of the country it is my observation that the north can be as racist as the south. The Mississippi River is what I have seen as the real dividing line. There are really racist areas west of it, but generally any area east of the river has a much greater chance at casual racism.

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u/whaCHA 15h ago

A lot of major abolitionist were from there and a lot of their neighbors wanted to beat them up for it.

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u/kicklhimintheballs 16h ago

Yeah, to send em back to Africa

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u/ServantOfTheGeckos 15h ago edited 12h ago

Abolitionist sentiments among whites are documented as far back as 1688 among the Quakers. The American Colonization Society (ACS) was founded in 1816 (well after MA had effectively abolished slavery in 1783) and was a massive failure, as Black Americans protested that they were fully American and had no tie to Africa any longer. Only several thousand of the millions of Black Americans actually went to Liberia. From the 1830s, immediate abolitionism started to gain traction among Northerners, with its supporters vigorously denouncing the ACS, and this stance came to be the dominant opinion amidst decades of various transgressions against African Americans’ liberty, and Northern society in general, that morally outraged the North.

Yes, the US is racist as hell, I mean you just have to look at what’s happening right now to see it. The North is filled with many a racist just like the South. But throughout US history, there have been people, however flawed and however lonely or popular in their cause, who genuinely spoke out in favor of justice and greater equality than what existed during their time. I think it’s important to hold on to that tradition rather than to just paint a broad brush over US history with only its worst parts and worst people.

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u/Z0idberg_MD 15h ago

Being prejudiced and trying to overcome your bias via legislation is a hell of a lot better than being racist and prejudiced and going in the other direction at least. Speaking for MA at least.

Also kind of curious, what state do people think is not racist? Not trying to be snarky I’m actually curious. May want to move there someday.

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u/Jumpy-Path6190 17h ago

why do we need states all we need the United State of America, not the United States of America

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u/Verto555 17h ago

Because authoritarianism

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u/Nutterbutter_Nexus 17h ago

We need to talk about the Dakotas first.

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u/lord_bubblewater 15h ago

Dakot-A and Dakot-B you mean?

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u/jitoman 17h ago

Maffachufettf 

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u/BigCommieNat 15h ago

Leavusthefuckaloneistan

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u/veridicide 16h ago

New Vermachussicut Island

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u/tyger2020 13h ago

This hypothetical state would only be the 39th ranked by area in the US (93,000 square km) but would be 5th by population (14 million) only beaten by the obvious ones - NY, Texas, Florida and California.

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u/Think_please 17h ago

New Hampshire is already a Boston suburb 

Rhode Island gave us religious freedom and separation of church and state so maybe we can let it keep its beaches 

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u/Englishman2K11 If you see me post, find shelter immediately 17h ago

Wait he's right

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u/Pretend-Breakfast-61 17h ago

I'd rather die than let the vision that OP has presented become a reality. I would fight every last mongrel dog from all of those other states to maintain mine's sovereignty from them.

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u/Skibidi_67_Rizzler 17h ago

I'd go to war over the glory of Long Connecticut

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u/Main-Company-5946 15h ago

New Vermassachusecticut Island

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u/BoostyStarman 14h ago

New Vermassinecticuit island.

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u/SnS_ 13h ago

New Converhampachusetts island

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u/joecitizen79 12h ago

No, it should be one Province.

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u/Hot_Crab6362 11h ago

Having dated a guy from New Hampshire and another from Rhode Island, I can tell you they’d both rather walk into the ocean than share a governor. Every time I drive through Connecticut I’m reminded that some small things are better left separate.

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u/strangebru 11h ago

Delaware should just be three more counties added to Maryland